


Deliverance

by Zeds_Dead_Reader (Zeds_Dead)



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Abduction, Angry Sex, Canon Related, Cruelty, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Relationships, Eventual Romance, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Fights, Grief/Mourning, Humiliation, Humor, Loss, Love, Manga Spoilers, Medical Experimentation, Pain, Poisoning, Reader-Insert, Rough Sex, Secrets, Sexual Tension, Smut, Torment, Torture, Violence, servitude
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-17
Updated: 2016-03-29
Packaged: 2018-05-27 06:18:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 21
Words: 54,429
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6273121
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zeds_Dead/pseuds/Zeds_Dead_Reader
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You didn't join the Survey Corps because you were exceptionally gifted.</p><p>You didn't join the Survey Corps because you had a righteous desire to aid the fight.</p><p>You didn't join the Survey Corps because you wanted to.</p><p>You joined the Survey Corps because someone told you to, an insistence that you were growing to resent that little bit more every single day.</p><p>Why had you listened? Obeyed that drivel and enlisted? All it had brought so far was suffering, humiliation and incredibly infuriating superiors. But perhaps there was more to it than first imagined, a situation which was wholly unforseen, one that sent you spiralling into danger, loss and love.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Lot In Life

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! I'm trying my hand at another canon fic, had this idea rattling around for a while so decided to let it out.
> 
> The story begins in the year 849, before the 104th graduate, before the wall is breached again.
> 
> I'll attempt to keep it as true to the manga as possible where those events cross lines with my own story. Obviously I'm not an expert so if there are any discrepancies with timings etc, I do apologise.
> 
> It's not following it to the letter as I want to explore a sideline to the tale we all know and love already, hopefully provide a good read that runs along side.
> 
> As always, feedback and comments are gratefully received, I do like to chat :) 
> 
> So here we go. I don't own SnK/AoT in any way.
> 
> Originally posted under my other deletexaccount, I'm moving everything over here now, taking my works with me.
> 
> Please note - these are 100% mine from my other account, if you have read this work before, it would have been on my other username. I haven't stolen this...

The rain beat against the headquarter's windows in rivers of liquid, deafening sound filling the draughty halls and adding to the chilled atmosphere. Hugging yourself tight, you hurried to the place that had been called home for nearly twelve months, the room which housed your meagre belongings and uncomfortable bed, the space which would no doubt be invaded again tonight as always. There was little chance of rest even without the raging storm outside, a fact that caused you to scowl as tired feet pounded down the corridors, the smell of the stables still clinging to your body like it was a tangible object, one which could be picked up and examined.

Slamming the door shut, you glared at the handle and the distinct lack of a lock. Being here had come with so many rules and regulations, ones that didn't apply to anyone else but you had to accept them, it was part of the deal. Throwing your clothes to one side, you turned the taps and prayed to anything religious that hot water would come out today, not the dirty, cold streams that had offended you yesterday. If they insisted on using you as a dogsbody, getting filthy and mucky every day then the least they could do was provide a method to clean in peace.

Blessed warmth sprung from the shower head and you almost cried, skin dirty and body exhausted, both begging for this relaxing event. Stepping underneath, (e/c) eyes closed slowly with a moan of pleasure, face up into the powerful jets. You stood a while, letting the steam form and fill the small bathroom, misting the window and tiny mirror. Eventually you started to soap up, washing the day's exertion away in mucky deposits of horse shit, mud and hay. The noise of the main door opening and closing was muffled by the roar of water around your ears and you ran suds through tangled locks, ridding your hair of any stray leaves. Satisfied you had done a good enough job, you stepped out and grabbed a towel, stiff fabric rubbing against your flesh during the dry down.

Wrapping it around your body, you reached for a comb to sort your (h/c) strands out, tugging through harshly when you first became aware of another presence. What now? Haven't I done enough? Everyone else gets to slack off, you grumbled internally. Go fuck about with each other and act like stupid children, but no, not you, not one of the oldest of the bunch. You had to do what they said at all times. Unsure who had come to ruin your evening, you took a peek and saw a flash of blonde hair. Fuck. Not the Commander. Whilst not the harshest, he could be the most annoying at times due to his moral high ground, the large brows having a set of ethics all to themselves.

"Can I at least get dressed first, Erwin?"

"Please do, (F/N)."

"Do you mind?"

"I'll be outside." The door closed again and you sighed. Surely nothing else needed cleaning and you hadn't even eaten yet. Pulling on casual clothes, the fact they weren't yours picked at your mind, knowing that the black trousers and white top were most certainly a man's, ill fitting garments which were graciously given to you as an after thought. Slipping into clean leather shoes, you took a deep breath and called out to let Erwin know you were ready. In seconds the towering giant was back, blue eyes serious as ever but with a hint of enjoyment. They all seemed to like it, making you suffer. That was because of your strange situation, you presumed.

Your parents hadn't prompted you to join up, quite the opposite - they were distraught when you left. Similarly, the few friends you had were equally shocked and appalled. The person who put you here was some random old woman, a female who found you in a tavern and took you to the side. At first you thought she was going to tell you off for drinking, a young woman of only twenty one not suitable for these places but instead she had turned your world upside down, perhaps ruined your life in the process.

In a crackling, haggish voice she had whispered to you, rancid breath invading your nostrils as a strange truth was delivered - you had to go into service, choose the Survey Corps. If you didn't, someone integral to the survival of humanity would die and curse the whole of mankind to an horrific death. At first you laughed, long and loud, gaining a few glances from other patrons who recognised you as a regular from the farming community nearby, however she did something which rendered you incapable of refusal. Wrinkled hands had touched yours, gripping tight and you gasped, images flashing through your mind of your life so far, things only you knew about like the time you stole meat from the guy next door and kept it in a box under your bed, eating it bit by bit in secret.

But then came even worse pictures, your family's dead bodies, walls broken down and titans everywhere, rotting flesh on the streets where there had once been market stalls and children playing, now only mangled forms of infants and their mothers where they had been trampled. All of that would come to pass if you didn't enter the Corps. There was no doubt in your mind at the time that it was all true, how else would she be able to do that kind of thing? You'd asked the woman what you had to do once there and her answer was cruel and full of glee - just follow orders, no matter what they are. Be a servant. The real purpose would become evident when required.

By the time you had reached home her words sounded ridiculous, the ramblings of an elderly fool and you went to bed in the family home with a smile on your face. However, every single night since then was filled by nightmares, the corpses, crushed bones, humans wiped out deftly. After a month of this you had stopped sleeping, opting instead for sitting up and trying to stay awake each evening, growing more and more insane as it went on. One day, her familiar figure had approached and a weathered finger just pointed at you. And that was it. Packing a few things up, you left your parents behind and rode to the military base, begging to be let in. That first night you had collapsed to the hard mattress and slept a dream-free slumber. Since then, no more terrors, no more hideous occurrences, just pure, deep sleep.

Four years later and here you were, almost 12 months into your residence with the goddamn Survey Corps and you'd never even seen a titan, not allowed to put your skills to use or help in the fight. That part suited you fine; whilst proficient with the manoeuvre gear, your reservations at actually wielding the blade were quite strong. What did bother you was how right the old hag had been. You were a servant through and through, always treated as such by those highest as if they were in on some kind of bullying plan and you held little regard for yourself now, as did everyone else it seemed. So you kept quiet and out of sight where possible, doing as you were told and waiting impatiently for the moment to come when your apparent part in the maybe fictional prophecy would be revealed.

Turning to one of the people who ordered you around, you scowled up at the imposing form. "What do you need now?"

"That's no way to speak to your superior, (F/N)."

"Cut the crap, Erwin. I'm not in the mood. Just get on with it." That seemed to enliven him and you sighed.

"Kitchens are short staffed. We need you to scrub the pots."

"Alright." Rolling up your sleeves, they kept falling down and you cursed. Stupid massive clothes. "Can't I have proper ones that fit?"

"You'll only get them filthy."

"Yes, because you lot seem to like making me do all the shit no one else will do."

"Is that not your purpose?"

"Seems so. You guys are evil, you know that?"

"Not evil, (F/N). Necessary."

"Whatever." Sweeping out, you left him behind in your room and stalked the halls, passing cadets and superiors along the way who you simply nodded to plainly, even if any of them did try to talk to you. Not everyone was a total bastard, mainly just one actually, the clean freak who excelled at making your life hell. He had a never ending list of things for you to do, all the while smirking at your discomfort when he would tell you to redo the floors, wash the windows twice, work faster. Your presence appeared to amuse him so he tended to hover around, quipping with sly remarks and always on the other side of a door or in your path like he sought you out to deliver chores. No kind of respect was offered his way, calling him by his first name rather than the usual cries of 'Sir!' which were frequently heard.

As you entered the mess hall you saw the man himself, sitting pompously and sipping his all-important tea as grey eyes followed your progress. Not looking, you stormed through the doors to tackle the food encrusted pans. Erwin joined his friend, both men speaking softly so as not to be overheard by anyone else that remained.

"Do you think we're a bit hard on the girl, Levi?"

"Fuck off. No. We're just doing what we're supposed to."

"Yes, but do you have to look like you're having so much fun in the process?"

"Me? Looking like I'm having fun?" A glint of silver crossed his gaze and the blonde man shook his head. This might be necessary to protect the woman, though he did wonder if the Captain could be a bit too enthusiastic at times.

"How long do you think she'll put up with it?"

"Well, it's been nearly a year already. I wouldn't have thought a total fucking meltdown was far off."

"I wonder what's going to happen." Levi shrugged at the query from the other male and sighed, casting his glare around the room at all the oblivious souls in here, all unaware of the person in their midst.

"Who knows. It could be any of us that makes her snap. Even you." Leaving him with that prospect, the pale man rose and went to check on your work, inspect the no doubt shoddy attempts at scrubbing the metal items. Also, he rather enjoyed making the woman squirm. Erwin was right. He was having fun.


	2. Hope

Ignoring the other person in here, you furiously scrubbed at the item, removing food and burn marks with skill as you had done time after time in the past. Footsteps circled and a disapproving tut sounded out. Giving the pan a harsher seeing to, you channelled wrath into the cleaning motions and wiped your brow quickly with the back of your arm, large sleeves dropping instantly and soaking up the dirty water when you recommenced proceedings.

"Fucking slob." Not even the scathing hiss stopped you, pulling the annoying garment up with violent force. Levi watched carefully, aware of what might happen but strangely intrigued to be the first to witness it, preferably not too closely though. Keeping a safe distance, steely eyes saw the way the ugly clothes hung from your frame, fabric clouding the form beneath and making you look like a child who had dressed up in their parent's items. He found it oddly alluring, however wouldn't ever admit that to anyone. The way he, along with others, had kept you beaten down, made to carry out menial tasks and remain almost genderless was all part of the plan, a way to keep you inside and in the arms of safety for now, kill your spirit along with any sense of fight to make you compliant and under constant watch.

Erwin had a good point earlier, he mused. It would come. Soon. There was only so much a person could take and he relished what was like an experiment into the human psyche, almost as much as that crazy shitty glasses did. Thinking of the woman, he hadn't seen her for a while, probably busy cooking up some ridiculous scheme to bring things to the surface quicker. Levi was convinced that this would do the trick, though. Simple psychological torment. This wasn't supposed to be the point of it all, they were simply your keepers for now until the threat could be eliminated, but no one could help it. Curiosity had gotten the better of them. And by 'them', that meant a select few - trusted members who still didn't fully believe the supposed truth.

Shaking with effort, you gave the last of your waning strength and finished with a snarl, throwing the cloth to the side. Your breaths were heavy and exhausted, hair still wet from the shower you would probably have to retake now and a loud grumble came from your stomach.

"Tch. Haven't you eaten, brat?"

"And when was I supposed to do that, hmm? When I was knee deep in shit or up to the elbows in grease?"

"Watch your tongue, (L/N)." Eventually, you looked up into the stony face you wanted to slap. He was the worst, garnering a kind of intense pleasure from your suffering. On the days they went outside the walls, you had peace. That was until they returned and you had to see their expressions, help cremate the dead, tend to wounds and patch up broken minds. You didn't mind assisting with that at all, it was the least you could do for those who had been around at breakfast and then suddenly weren't, whether that was due their death or losing another little piece of their souls. However the pale man never came for medical attention, never spoke about the things he'd seen or people he'd lost. Never. Stone cold, that one.

As you wiped down the surfaces, you shrugged. "Am I to presume there's no food left now anyway, Levi?"

"If there was, we wouldn't want to waste it on you." Setting your eyes on him in a scowl, you remained steady and snarled quietly.

"Why? Why the fuck is this happening?"

"You know the answer to that so don't ask stupid fucking questions. Now piss off, get some rest. We have an early start tomorrow."

"Doing what?!"

"Just be ready before dawn, (F/N)." He rarely used your first name and when he did, it came out in a purring roll of sarcasm, like it was some massive joke. Not interested in this discussion anymore, you marched off, paying no attention to those still milling around and making for your pitiful home. Chucking clothes to the floor, all you could do was get into your night wear and flop to the hard bed, mind and body spent. Before allowing sleep to drift in, you considered the words spoken earlier about how you knew why this was all going on. In truth, you were aware to a degree but not in much detail.

The day you arrived, all the cadets had been assigned squads apart from you. The Commander had taken you to an office and introduced a manic looking woman with glasses, short angry man and a tall blonde with facial hair. This, it turned out, was the quartet responsible for your wellbeing. Four people who you would obey at all times and never question. At first, the one called Hange had buzzed around you, poking and prodding and questioning in riddles, asking what it was like and other things you knew nothing about. Mike, the towering male, had simply sniffed and leered whilst Levi graced you with a piercing grey stare. Erwin seemed nice enough, but even he appeared reluctant whilst speaking quietly.

"Tell us why you're here, (F/N)." It was all a bit overwhelming, sitting in a wooden chair surrounded by people who took an unhealthy interest in you.

"There…there was a woman. She showed me things, told me I had to join or someone important would die."

"Tch."

"Hear her out, Levi." At first you were scared of the short man, his sullen appearance and bored expression intimidating but after a few months, you got used to it. Erwin had continued after his subordinate's noise of distaste. "What did she show you?" Explaining in detail, you gave a graphic account of your visions in the tavern when you'd been touched, the nightmares that followed until you entered training and how they disappeared instantly.

"And…um, that's it."

"I see." A few glances were exchanged and you felt like you were being interrogated, not welcomed into the Corps. It also seemed that they knew more than you did, the way they looked at each other showing that you had been expected.

"So, what now?"

"Now my dear, you can come with me!" Hange had grabbed your hand and dragged you away against your will, pulling your body through corridors and into a small lab. Jars and pieces of strange machinery were dotted around along with piles of notes and diagrams, none of which made any sense to you. The woman grinned and plonked you on a seat, pulling her own close as she hovered in your face.

"What's going on, Squad Leader?"

"Hange, please. Never mind with all of that." Her glasses gleamed as wide eyes narrowed. "You really don't know?"

"Not a clue."

"We heard about you, (F/N). We've been asked to keep you safe."

"So, you believe me?"

"Not sure yet, but we can do some tests, see what's going on inside that pretty head of yours."

"Who asked you to…"

"I can't tell you anymore than that, but what did the old woman say? All of it?"

"She said I had to do what I was told and be a servant, basically."

"Hmm. Sounds dull. Safer than taking on the titans, though, eh?!"

Back in the office, unbeknownst to you, three men had been having their own stern discussions.

"Are we seriously going to keep a capable soldier locked up and treated like a fucking maid?"

"I understand your concerns Levi, I really do. But we have our orders, and our payment, don't forget that."

"So how much does someone's freedom cost, Erwin?"

"Don't get all pious on me now. I have other plans too."

"You usually do."

"And do you trust my decisions?" Two sets of eyes locked together in a silent show of sizing each other up, watched by a smirking blonde who had kept out of this little tiff.

"Always, Commander."

"Right. Well if you're ready to be quiet and listen, I'll explain?" A pale hand gestured to allow the man to continue. "Thank you, Levi." He spoke to those gathered about what might be a valuable asset, a person who could be kept in check and rendered loyal. That would keep up their end of the agreement. But the twist was to be their own attempts to discover what lay inside, scant details already having been provided by their business associate.

"And how do you propose we do that?" Levi was leaning against the wall, small smirk on his lips as he waited for the ever-scheming male to finish.

"Simple. Destroy her will so she doesn't want to leave the walls, aggravate the woman to the point that something may reveal itself."

"We're trusting the words of an old fool."

"Maybe."

"All that might happen is we end up with a homicidal maniac in our midst."

"In that case, we hand her over to the military police." Erwin's matter-of-fact answer was met by a small huff of laughter.

"You really are a fucking piece of work."

"Are you saying you're not going to comply, Levi? You? The one so good at ordering others to carry out menial tasks and pissing people off?"

"Oh I will. I just think we're going to be disappointed."

~~~~~~

Still unable to rest, you shuffled under the scratchy covers and changed positions. Arms and legs out like a star. Curled in a ball. On your front. Left side, right side, nothing would work. And to top it all off, someone had just walked in. You'd never understood why you weren't allowed a lock. A thump sounded out with a clang of metal, making you jump slightly. "Who…who's there?"

"Relax, you shit. I've brought you some food." The shadowy figure stopped a moment, as if he had something more to say. "Wear your uniform tomorrow. Sort your gear." Levi left, closing the door gently and you lay staring at the ceiling in disbelief. All this time and he had never come here to provide anything but work. Not only that, you were being allowed to put the clothing on you hadn't touched since that first day. What the hell was going on? You didn't want to get your hopes up, he'd probably only inspect your efforts then tell you to get back into the usual garb, however the spark of excitement inside refused to be dampened as you leapt up to devour the cold items on the tray.

Outside, the man stood and listened to the sounds of movement in the room and nodded. He knew this was the right decision.


	3. Secret

Candles lit your early morning preparations, orange flickers providing the means to see what you were doing as you dealt with the straps like greeting an old friend. It had been nearly a year since the feeling of leather had bitten into your skin through the fabric which fit perfectly. Almost perfectly; all of the physical labour you had done meant that they were slightly looser than before but still infinitely better than what you had been used to. Pulling on the high boots, you bent to ensure everything was tucked in correctly as the door opened silently. Silver eyes stared, greeted by your ass high in the air, white trousers clinging tightly. Levi cleared his throat and you shot up and spun, cheeks flushed.

"Oh…morning…sorry…"

"Just get your gear on." He stood and watched as expert hands did as commanded, deftly connecting what needed to be joined and attaching the large items with skill. Seems it was an action which had been emblazoned on your mind, he thought. Good. This bodes well. "Cloak?"

"Hang on." Rummaging in the small wardrobe, you located the green cover and pulled it around your shoulders, feeling like a proper soldier for the first time in so long. "Where are we going?"

"Wait and see. Come on. And be fucking quiet." So this wasn't sanctioned activity? Even more exciting. Heart pounding, you crept down the halls in the man's wake, keeping up and following closely. Cool morning air chilled your skin as you strode outside, refreshing breeze running through your hair with delicious tickles. You noticed the direction that was being taken, one which pointed straight for the trees and you whispered while you trotted along in the dark.

"Are we doing practice?"

"I said be quiet."

"But what…"

"Another word and we're going straight back." Sufficiently chided, you sulked but only half-heartedly, still intrigued as to what this man wanted with you all of a sudden. Reaching the small forest, Levi stopped and lifted a hand. "Show me what you can do." He'd never seen you in action, only heard that the skills you possessed in this area were supposed to be impressive.

"It's been a while…"

"And? Go." Nodding, you sent the cables out with a satisfying puff of gas and lifted from the ground, elated to feel the sensation of flight once more. Wind whipped at your skin, leaves slapped at your body and trees were impaled with hooks as you soared higher and higher, skipping through the branches with spins and jumps, free falling only to pin to another trunk, skimming the ground with your heels. It was liberating in the extreme, heart filled with joy and you let out an involuntary cry of euphoria. Despite the faint light offered by the slowly rising sun, you moved with accuracy, recalling the motions as if it were only yesterday, fingers pulling on the triggers at the exact right time.

So caught up in the freedom, you didn't notice the form getting near and the first you knew of it was a body colliding with yours, sending you tumbling to the still rain soaked ground. Air was pushed from your lungs and a searing pain shot up your leg as you landed awkwardly, yelling in frustration and agony. "What the fuck?" Feet set down carefully in front of your felled form as their owner paced towards you.

"You lost concentration. Sloppy. I could've been a fucking titan."

"At that size? Pfft." A boot was placed on your chest and Levi shoved you down onto your back.

"I don't have to be doing this, you know."

"So why are you?"

"You're a member of the Survey Corps. If it comes to it, we need everyone we fucking have and I don't want to be caught out with some incompetent little shit by my side."

"Well why keep me hidden away then? Why not let me train?"

"I am now."

"Hmm. And I suppose Erwin knows all about our little session?" Levi grabbed hold of your shirt, yanking you up to standing position with ease, eyes daring you to say more as he nearly touched his nose with yours.

"Don't be a fucking smart ass, (L/N). I can just let you get back to shovelling shit?"

"Ok…sorry." Releasing his grip, the man still held you with his stern expression, silver shards examining every feature.

"Good. Now go again. This time, be ready for me." He gave you a push, making your feet stumble back. It was like he was provoking you. Not biting, you instead swept off into the canopy again, soft rays beginning to signal the start of the day. If this was indeed in secret, the chance would end soon so you took full advantage, shooting through the air and keeping a keen eye for your would-be attacker. Sensing movement, you swung to the side, seeing Levi narrowly miss both your body and a tree, correcting himself smoothly. He was good. Very good. But so were you.

Playing a game of cat and mouse, you taunted your pursuer by letting him get close, only to speed away again. Without meaning to, you began to laugh, thoroughly enjoying yourself and having fun; actual fun for the first time in years. The last memory of such frivolity was when you were about eighteen, running around like a kid with your small band of friends and causing havoc, using fences and haystacks as part of some juvenile assault course which ended up in everyone becoming covered in mud and reprimanded by local farm owners. That had been back before the wall was breached, back before life became hard and solemn.

Levi glared at the giggles coming from your open mouth, the flashes of (h/c) hair whipping in the wind that revealed the wide grin on his prey's face. Who knew she could look so alive? It had been a decision he was pondering for a while, aware of the fact you had graduated in the top ten with a proficiency in using the gear and he wanted to witness your capabilities. That and a strong sense of needing to allow you to be free. When he had grumbled at Erwin upon your arrival, he meant it - how much value was placed on a life? Of course, he did take an evil satisfaction in seeing the woman do anything asked of her, but this was much more gratifying. Something seemed to have stopped the laughter, a cloud of darkness and rather than find out what caused the shift, he took the chance and struck.

Momentarily distracted by the past, you let your guard down and found yourself caught again, rolling across grass and dirt, a body attached to you the whole time. Coming to a halt, Levi leant up on his hands and stared with triumph, lips twitching into a smirk. "Don't start daydreaming when you're in battle, (F/N)."

"I wasn't…"

"I don't care what it was. Focus." On his feet in a second, you scowled as he brushed the leaves and muck from his uniform, face screwed up in disgust. You knew what you'd be doing today. "This needs washing. Come by my quarters to collect it after breakfast." There it was. Of course, back to normal. "We'd better get back." Making no sly quip about the covert nature of the outing, you just clambered up and jogged to keep pace with his determined stride.

By the time you'd changed into your usual flapping clothes the mess hall was buzzing, full of activity and a few people nodded or smiled in greeting. Given your lifted mood, you actually reciprocated and grinned, causing some surprised looks. One particular man stood and tilted his head, usual white bandana in place. "Well I never expected to see that, (F/N)!"

"Hi Dita. I'm just in good spirits today, that's all."

"Glad to hear it. And can I say, you did a fantastic job in the stables yesterday. I hope Shallot didn't bother you too much?" Self consciously touching your hair, you smiled.

"No bother at all. I need to get one of those head scarves though."

"I'd certainly recommend it." Nodding, you said your farewells to the friendly man and greeted a few other people, a veritable glow around you regardless of the trousers that scuffed the floor and shirt that had to be rolled up to your elbows constantly. No one ever questioned it, just accepted your appearance and the fact you never went on expeditions even though you had been tipped to excel in certain areas. They knew someone higher up had made it happen, so stayed quiet. To your face, at least.

As you selected some breakfast, you took your usual seat in the corner which was always vacant, the same understanding in the those around you that this was the woman's place. Was it sympathy? Pity? Or purely habit? Almost all of them had been taken by you somewhere after a mission returned, whether for medical assistance or mental, so perhaps it was respect. Whichever way that went, you were glad to have your own little home.

Erwin leant close to the man to his left, eyes on the female who had suddenly sprouted a kind of confidence. "I don't know what you did Levi, but stop it."

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

"We can't let her leave." He knew the Captain was uneasy with the whole situation, playing along but ultimately finding it abhorrent so it would be just the thing for him to take it upon himself to do something to go against the grain.

"Erwin, get a grip. Like I have nothing better to do than indulge that piece of trash."

"I'm not a stupid man. I can tell when you're up to something."

"I have no idea what you mean, Commander." Drawing out the last word, Levi raised his cup to his mouth. Aware of being observed, you glanced over and saw a pair of blue eyes staring, an awkward kind of wave given by the blonde but the grey orbs were full of mischief as a smug look was hidden behind a ceramic shield like this was some kind of naughty secret. Interesting.

~~~~~~

Hands worked strongly at cloth, rubbing the solution into the white uniform to remove any sign of this morning's earlier activities. Levi hadn't been in his room when you collected the bundle, so you had scooped it up to do as asked. Whilst engrossed, you began to wonder just what he was playing at. Would that be it? Sizing you up? Or was some more kind of training in store?

Shaking out the wet uniform, you secured it to dry next to your own. In the interest of not making it look too obvious, you'd offered to wash some of the other's sets too, Dita taking the chance gladly as he was running out of spares. It was mundane, therapeutic work and as you stood back to admire the line of now pristine items, a voice made you jump.

"Not bad. You'll be doing the same fucking thing tomorrow if you don't get better at keeping your concentration." The man just materialised out of thin air, a habit which was as annoying as it was alarming. This time was quite welcome, though.

"So we can go again? In the morning?"

"I wouldn't get too excited. I'll only win again.'

"Yea alright, whatever you say, Captain." Spitting the official title out, you gave a sly smile that said the game was on, using his rank only when pissed off or trying to get a rise out of the often insufferable male. It never worked.

"We need drinks in Erwin's office this afternoon. Official meeting or some shit like that."

"Shall I to wear an apron? Bring them on a silver tray?" There was a faint flicker in his stony eyes but whatever it was about remained unspoken, usual bastard response given instead.

"Just bring them. Balance them on your fucking head for all I care. And for being a smart ass again, my boots need shining. All of them." Spinning on his heel, Levi strutted off as a sarcastic retort came his way, one which he had to stifle a smile at.

"Fuck me, how many feet have you got?!"

~~~~~~

Standing outside the door to Erwin's office, you stayed as still as could be, trying to pick up on some words from the important meeting. It wasn't that you were particularly nosey, but boredom had set in a few hours earlier when you couldn't find Hange for a chat, all given chores completed including Levi's ridiculously large collection of footwear. In fact, no one really seemed to be around. There wasn't an expedition due for another fortnight so that couldn't be it. No meat in the kitchens today so everyone hadn't been hanging out by the servery like rabid dogs and the grounds were fairly quiet. And that's how you found yourself eavesdropping when you should have been delivering the tea and water. That and the distinct disability to knock.

Holding the tray, wooden not silver, meant that you had no free hands and short of kicking or headbutting the entrance, you had no option. Putting it on the floor would be a no go, it was far too heavy and cumbersome to attempt that without spilling everything. So you just stood there. Listening. Not much was intelligible, words muffled and quiet but suddenly they got louder and your heart almost stopped in your chest as Erwin and Mike's voices filtered through.

"…can't keep her here anymore…"

"…need to make a choice…"

"…about the family?"

"…don't need to know…"

"…can look like an accident…"

Then the final nail in the coffin, a dark drawl with horrifically clear tones which made your blood run cold.

"I'll take care of it. I'll kill (F/N)."


	4. Starting Point

Oh fuck. No. No no no, what was going on? Why couldn't you stay here? Why did you have to die? Unable to move, you stood rooted to the spot, fear creeping into your heart and crawling over cold flesh like a swarm of bees, all waiting to sting at once. I'll run in a minute, you told yourself. Gain the use of my legs and flee. Any second now. Just wait for it...

The door flew open to reveal four faces, the closest one smiling widely as Mike raised his brows and gestured for you to enter. When you remained in place, he inexplicably started to laugh. "You should see your face right now, (F/N). Come in, we won't hurt you."

"B-but…?" Mouth gaping, you stared at them all, gauging the intent. The bearded male was still in fits of giggles, Erwin sat with an expectant look on his features and Levi just stood against the wall with his arms crossed, glaring back in cruel enjoyment. Hange was the only one to give any kind of clue as to the reality.

"Oh stop it, you're all being mean. (F/N), don't pay any attention. They were joking."

"Wha…?"

"Next time you decide to listen in on a private meeting, make sure Mike isn't one of those in attendance." The Commander started to smile too as he spoke but you still couldn't form any words correctly.

"And maybe take a fucking shower so you don't smell like shit." No emotion was available on the pale man, only that same deadpan delivery as usual. Luckily, one of the nicer people in here explained.

"We knew you were out there so these bastards decided to play a trick." Hange gestured to the conspirators with an unimpressed wave of the hand. "So don't listen. Get that butt in here, I'll take care of them later." Sudden life sprung into your limbs and heavy feet dragged you in the room, shuffling carefully so as not to spill the liquid, all the while watched closely. Laying the tray down slowly, you wiped your now clammy hands on the back of your trousers and pulled them up a bit, belt doing little to assist today.

"Erm…I'll just go?"

"I need a change of bed sheets, (F/N)." Shooting Levi a look of pure hatred in his direction, you stuck your middle finger up and strode away, sound of hearty laughter from the other two men trailing out of the room before you could slam the door shut. Marching down the halls, thoughts turned to the people you'd left behind. It was a bizarre relationship you held with those four. Even though they were your superior officers and you obeyed every single order, there was an allowance too. No one else would dare act or speak like you did with them and you felt almost like the club mascot, a sometimes offensive yet hardworking member of the team whose behaviour was tolerated on account of all the redeeming, compliant features. Hange enjoyed your company and you hers, chats frequent and often full of fun. She was the only one who never told you what to do, she asked for your help.

The three males however had no issues with that part. Mike wasn't too bad, usually giving you a smile or pat on the head, treating you in a manner akin to a pet or visiting niece. He did have a dangerous sense of humour though and you had no doubt it was his idea to spin that little prank just now. The way you suffered the jokes well and even aided with some of his more intricate plans endeared him to you somewhat and he didn't mind your banter at all.

Erwin hadn't been very clear almost a year ago when you arrived bright eyed and ready to do your bidding. He knew what you had been told and seemed unsurprised by it, so you did wonder how much more he was aware of. He would sometimes talk with you in the late evenings when your paths crossed, discuss things like how he was scheming up a new strategy or what it was like outside the walls. The man indulged your curious nature, obliging with tales of huge forests and vast plains. And, of course, titans.

The one who caused you the most trouble seemed to be getting interesting. Levi had said little at first, preferring to tut or snort instead of using his words but as time went on, even he would let the facade slip on occasion. Not often, but now and again he started to mutter a few things, usually to express annoyance or tell you something wasn't quite up to standard however the odd piece of personality would shine through, evil streak made evident during a small rant about another member of the Corps and the kind of torture he would like to inflict upon them. It was if he were using you as an agony aunt of sorts, venting his distaste. Perhaps it was because you were different, unconnected to a degree, a neutral ear to listen to his grumbles. Whatever it was, you enjoyed being allowed in slightly and he certainly appreciated your tea-making skills.

The man knew he wound you up expertly, seemingly gaining pleasure from making you squirm but as instructed to do four years ago, you always obeyed. All of that may have been why Levi never appeared to mind your crude gestures, uncouth language towards him or the back-chat. You'd seen some recruits wince when they heard you squabble, others expecting a strike or at least verbal lashing but it rarely came. When it did, the intent was usually half-hearted and all part of the game apart from outside this morning, you mused. Holding you by the shirt and shoving strongly had been one of the first displays of true physical anger you'd seen. The odd foot was stuck out when you passed to trip you up, a firm grasp on your arm that meant business had been applied all too often but this had been different and yet again you felt like he'd been trying to push your buttons.

Arriving at his room, you shoved at the door only to find it locked. Great. How were you supposed to get clean sheets on his bed without a key? Rattling the handle pointlessly, you kicked the wood in frustration. Bollocks. Something told you he did this on purpose and you sighed, resting your forehead against the hard surface. There were no other orders so until this one was complete, you might as well just stay put. The fact that everyone seemed to be busy elsewhere added to your apathy, so you sat down on the floor to wait.

Half an hour later and a sharp prod in your leg woke you from an unexpected snooze, shining boot jabbing into your limb with a steady pace. Clearing your eyes, you slowly gazed up to see the occupant of the room you slept outside staring down with faint amusement, kicks still being applied.

"Stop that."

"Get out of my way and I'll stop."

"You're like a fucking child sometimes, Levi."

"Perhaps. But I always get what I want, so it must work."

"Not this time." Crossing your arms, you remained defiant and challenged the juvenile man with a small smirk. The blows became harder, moving your body with each one but you didn't react at first, allowing his foot to continue. "Nice try."

"You really want to test me, (L/N)?"

"Yup. Only fair."

"Hmm?"

"You've been provoking me, so I'll offer you the same." Levi almost faltered, keeping his faint shock hidden well. So she had noticed that this morning? Fair enough. Let's play. Drawing his leg back, he went to deliver a harsh swing however just before he could connect, you sprung into action and grabbed out, yanking strongly as he only stood on one limb, bringing the usually unflappable man to your level and sending his ass crashing to the ground with a huff.

"That was very ill advised." The look you were treated to was full of malice, narrow shards of silver that also contained an evil sense of fun. With a shriek, you found yourself on your feet, spun round and pressed forwards into the door, arms held awkwardly behind you in a vice-like grip. Purring words were sent into your ear, loud and close. "Is that all you've got?" Squirming, you tried to ignore the way his breath tickled at your lobe and the sparks it shot into your stomach, horrified at yourself for having that kind of animal reaction.

"No…I've got…more…ngh…" Fighting against your captor, you wriggled around fervently, body twisting and turning until the most inappropriate thing in life happened, a result of all the movement and bad tailoring causing your borrowed trousers to drop to the floor. "Oh fuck..." Levi hadn't noticed from his position and wondered why the face that was pushed in the wood had turned a brilliant shade of crimson.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" Part of him hoped this was it, the event he had been waiting for coming in a rather odd display of embarrassment but a loud voice put an end to that.

"It's safe to say I was not expecting this when I walked round the corner. Captain Levi? Care to explain why you have a half-naked (F/N) up against your door?"

"Half what?!" He sprung back to see exactly what had occurred and turned away, hiding a smile and composing himself as you quickly covered your modesty with the large bottoms, tightening the useless belt as far as it would go.

"Erwin…I…it's…"

"I'm waiting, (F/N)." Scowling, you sorted yourself out and pointed to the man who was still staring down the hall.

"He kicked me!"

"She fell asleep on the fucking floor."

"I couldn't get in because some idiot locked the door!"

"And I couldn't get in because a little prick was in the way."

"Ok, ok enough. Both of you. Grow up, I haven't got time for this. Levi? Let her in. (F/N)? Find a better belt."

"I would, but…"

"No buts. Ask Hange." The large blonde stormed off, leaving the two of you with a glare to rival one of the Captain's. It was actually rather hard not to laugh and you looked at the floor, lips twitching as a key was shoved into the lock violently, metal clicking to allow entry and a hand pushed you through into the room.

"Hey, watch it!"

"Just get on with it. Don't disturb me."

"Fucking dick."

"Stupid shit." Regardless of the hissing words and recent moment of undress, you allowed the threatening grin to set in as deft fingers started getting clean sheets on the man's bed. Levi glanced up, sure that you were occupied and smirked. That had all been a pleasant surprise.

~~~~~~

"You did what?!"

"I didn't do it Hange! They fell down!"

"Oh sweetie. How awful!"

"It was quite funny to be honest."

"Funny? You must be so bored, (F/N)."

"I really am. Listen, why do I have to wear this shit anyway? I get that they don't want to waste uniforms on me but surely there's something that will fit better? I feel like an idiot." Eyes clouded behind thick glasses, thoughts whirring almost audibly as the woman tried to form a response. The truth would be no good, that wasn't an option, so she made up a feasible reason.

"There wasn't much to pick from to be honest, but I can take a look? Get you some smaller clothes?"

"Oh, I would love you forever if you could."

"You love me forever anyway. I'll do what I can, (F/N)."

"Thanks!" Shuffling in your chair, you leant forward to speak quietly in the crowded mess hall, everyone seemingly back from whatever the hell they'd been doing and enjoying dinner. It was the first time in ages that you hadn't sat in your usual corner and you felt a bit out of place, whispering in conspiring tones. "Why is Levi trying to piss me off?"

"What?"

"He's trying to get a rise out of me, I know it."

"I'm sure he's not, dear. Probably just being an asshole like usual."

"No, it's different. Like he wants some kind of reaction?"

"I have no idea. Right, I got to go. Do you mind sorting the…"

"Jars? No worries. On it."

"Thanks (F/N)." She rushed away, more erratically than her normal frantic method if that was possible, something that made you frown. After nearly a year, finally things were happening, signs pointing to perhaps learning about your real reason for being here.


	5. Changes

Puffs of cold air poured from your mouth as today's early morning session began to get underway, sun still sleeping and denying any kind of warmth. Icy hands clutched even frostier metal and you waited for the first instruction. It had been nearly five minutes of just standing still staring at the trees, time wasted with every passing second but you didn't take the bait, remaining outwardly calm and perfectly ok with the lack of action. Levi was definitely fucking with you. He was somewhere behind, how far you couldn't tell as there was no sound to gauge distance by, no light to aid your sight even if you had snapped and turned round. The man could have gone back to the base for all you knew.

Rustles and movements came from deep within the undergrowth, small animals no doubt getting comfortable for their version of night or maybe only rising to greet the new day. Each noise was amplified by the lack of illumination, senses on high alert for no apparent reason - nothing dangerous lurked here, surely. It got to the point where you started to think about things, mindless events like stacking jars for Hange yesterday and how aesthetically pleasing your arrangement had been. They'd only get messed up again, but you hoped she'd see the uniform way in which they had been placed, not because you needed validation, just to share the symmetry with someone else. Silly really, however the simple things in life could cause enjoyment, you supposed.

And then there was the promised new clothes, yet again one of the least important considerations in this world yet it mattered to you, even more so after flashing your underwear at two superior officers. Erwin hadn't spoken to you later on last night when you saw him, simply strode past with a nod. Embarrassment? Didn't know what to say? Probably the latter. Levi made no mention of it either, only grumbled a while when you went back after dinner to help him with some paperwork and such like, his most hated part of the job. If he could get you to do it, then all the better. It was something you didn't actually mind doing, a task more taxing than the usual sweeping and cleaning, causing your brain to be engaged and enlivened.

A bird joined the dawn awakening, sweet chirps tentative at first and then confidence grew, louder cries echoing around as it hopped from branch to branch, tiny feet bouncing to each bough like you should be doing. The feathered flurry came closer, not noticing your unmoving form and landed near, almost inviting you to reach out and touch it. You wondered what it would feel like, all warm and soft probably, nice and…

All that existed now was the ground, dirt in your face and a stone digging into your ribs as all air was expelled in a harsh burst of oxygen. It was hard to breathe, something preventing your lungs from expanding correctly and you were vaguely aware of the bird fleeing hastily. The pieces were placed together in a few seconds, realisation that you were essentially being sat on splintering into your brain with furious certainty. Struggling, you tried to get the body to leave, shifting side to side and grunting with effort. Somehow you managed a noise between a growl and cough.

"Fuckinggetoff."

"What did you do wrong?"

"Nothing…shit…"

"You must have, because here we are again." Levi's weight lifted and you rolled instantly, snarl in your throat as you sprung to your feet to face the smug man, rising sun allowing a slight view. Pointing an accusing finger, you stalked towards him, prodding against his chest.

"What the fuck was that for?"

"You need to learn to focus."

"And by learn, you mean get smashed to the floor?"

"If needs be." He wasn't backing down and neither were you, eyes locked in battle.

"Fuck you, Levi. I've had enough."

"Oh come, (L/N). Don't be such a fucking quitter."

"What would I even be quitting? This is bull shit." Somewhere inside you knew he was right, thoughts had been elsewhere and your barriers were down. That fact made you even madder, coupled with how you hadn't even got to use the gear today. "Are we going to train or what?"

"Not now. You might wrap yourself round a tree because you were thinking about some shitty boyfriend you left behind."

"Wha…but…oh piss off Levi, what the hell are you even talking about?"

"I'm sure a little slut like you has a trail of men back in that shithole you call home." Seeing red, you started to throw blow after blow at his body, punching and kicking whilst making a guttural sound. Levi dodged most of them, leaning back or to the side to avoid the incoming fists with ease. He soon grew tired and snatched hold of your wrists, keeping them in the air as you bucked and pulled to escape like a caged animal. Nothing had happened. Finally he'd made the woman snap but no spectacular display of wrath followed. It was quite a disappointment to him.

You saw a look of fatigue cross the pale face and calmed, frowning as your arms were still held up either side of your head. It was like he wanted something more and everything became too much. "Can you tell me what's going on?" Speaking mildly, you kept your cool, the knowledge that his words were probably meant to intentionally antagonize clear in your mind. Levi didn't move, weighing up his options swiftly. The truth couldn't come out yet; regardless of this experiment, it was only one try. He would find some way to hit a nerve more accurately next time, name calling and bringing your promiscuity into play had been rather childish however he knew little about you, taking that option and running with it. It was over, though. A failure.

"I'm helping you with your fucking concentration, (F/N)."

"Oh it's (F/N) now, is it?" Maybe this wasn't over, he mused and pushed that little bit further.

"Would you prefer something more fitting? Tell me, what name did you use when you were making money by spreading your fucking legs for the whole town?"

"Jealous are we, Levi?" It was over.

"Shut the fuck up and get back. The tables need scrubbing before breakfast."

"I can't."

"Are you disobeying me?"

"No. I literally can't. You're still holding my wrists." Some inner kind of peace had overcome you, unwilling to give in and get riled up by any of his flippant comments. If he wanted war, he would get resistance in an entirely other way - annoyingly passive behaviour.

"Tch." Dropping your limbs like they had been covered in filth, Levi curled his lip with disgust and stormed off, orange rays peeking over the treetops to light his way. You smiled and skipped along behind, full of new found energy and enjoyment now that your apparent instructor could be easily aggravated by politeness.

Doing as ordered, you went straight to work after changing into baggy items and were currently on the last wooden surface, body leant over as force was applied and soap brushed in harshly. The bucket of water by your side was dipped into and sloshed across the table, rinsing and removing the suds but also sending drops splashing to the floor. That was what the mop was for, propped up in the corner to be utilised in a moment. Last sweeps applied, you stood back to admire the hard work with hands on hips and moved to deal with the spilt liquid. You completed the task and gathered the tools up, ready to deliver the things back to the storage cupboard.

It was annoyingly far away and you strode down the hall, smiling at passers by and ignoring some strange looks. The feeling of being in control was strong and nothing could get you down. Whatever Levi was playing at, you had one up on him, you knew it. A friendly face approached, light hair framing placid features which betrayed her strength; the woman was supposed to be incredible in action and you hoped one day to see it yourself.

"Hey (F/N)! Hange is looking for you."

"Hi Petra. What's she after?"

"I think it had something to do with clothes and just as well." She giggled, hand up to her mouth in a sweet gesture. How could someone so innocent looking be such a ruthless killer?

"What do you mean?" Petra pointed and you looked down, suddenly aware of why some people had seemed so confused when they walked by. Maybe not confused, actually. "Oh what the…? Why me?" Whilst engrossed in your cleaning, you had been oblivious to the fact that you'd practically been lying across on the wet surfaces and now your tatty white shirt was stuck to your skin, exposing what was underneath in patches of damp fabric.

"Don't worry. We'll get you sorted, yea?" The other female linked her arm in yours to lead you away, still smiling widely. She was one of those many people who had no real idea why you were kept as a servant, angered at the fact this woman could be a steady ally in the field however any protestations had been met with stony indifference, assured that you were exactly where you belonged. Mop and bucket stowed safely, you continued the morning's journey to Hange's lab, chatting lightly along the way about the next expedition outside, listening intently to the plans and formation they would be using, one which hopefully would result in less death and more discovery. The Corps would be aiming for an outpost which was said to contain supplies that could be useful, sustain life and take away the wretched reliance on taxes, something which was always a sore point for civilians and politicians alike.

"I'll be out there with you guys soon. I'm fed up of this shit."

"I know (F/N). Trust me, I can tell you're itching to go. Not long, I'm sure."

"Do you know why I'm here?" Petra stopped and saw not desperation in your eyes but pure and honest questioning. She couldn't imagine what it would be like to have this kind of existence.

"No, sorry I don't. I've just been told it is how it is."

"Hmm. Sounds about right." Turning the corner, you were met by a blonde coming the other way, smile creeping over his lips as he tried hard not to laugh. "Piss off, Mike. I get it. Have your fun."

"What? It's a good look on you, (F/N)."

"Leave her alone. Can't you see she's already annoyed as it is?"

"Yes. That's what makes it all the more amusing." A grip on the arm led you past the grinning male and into your destination, an ecstatic brunette waiting with glee.

"Oh (F/N), have I got some good stuff for you, honey!" Clapping excitedly, she pointed for you to get closer and revealed the pile of fabric, stack of clothes waiting to be worn.

"Where did you get it all?" Eyes wide, you gazed upon the best thing you'd seen in ages, a simple bundle which meant so much. Hange hadn't checked with Erwin that this was ok, she didn't care - your wardrobe situation was getting ridiculous.

"Found them in an old storage room. All trousers, I didn't think you'd be one for a skirt."

"Hell no. Thank you. I can't explain how happy this makes me!"

"You're welcome. It's about time you had something that didn't end up around your ankles!"

"What?"

"Don't ask, Petra. Seriously." She nodded at your dismissal but a look had been exchanged, the older woman planning on telling all once you'd left. It was too good a story to keep to herself.

"Now, off you go and get changed before breakfast. I can't wait to see what people think!"

Half an hour later and you were feeling incredibly self conscious, a year's worth of inbuilt habit stripped away as tight black items were pulled on, no fear of these slipping down. Was this what you had become? A person so enraptured by having their own clothing? Is that it in life, being handed out treats to seem feminine? There must be more to it, you thought darkly. It wasn't that you were ungrateful for the kind gesture; a better way to describe it was pathetic. That was right, a silly little girl who needed to be justified by what she wore because there really was nothing else to look forward to right now, no end in sight and no prospects. Any inkling that something might be coming to a head had dissipated, foul mood returned once again despite the change in outfit.

Sighing, you stormed out of your room leaving the door wide open. No point closing it, anyone could walk in when they so wished. The hallways were quiet, everyone already no doubt engrossed in their morning meals and you hoped they would remain as such when you walked in to the main area. Fate was obviously not so benevolent as almost every set of eyes rested on the last one to breakfast that day, a woman who looked totally different to usual. Head down, you flew to grab some food and took up your seat in the corner, blanking any comments or observations that were thrown your way. Maybe this had been a bad move.

Shovelling the sustenance in swiftly to avoid being here for any longer than needed, you kept your eyes on the table and attempted to stop the blush that crept up from your chest. You should have been marching in here confidently but instead you felt like an absolute fool, indoctrination working it's cruel ways like a demonic puppet master. Aware of some commotion, you didn't look but heard Erwin admonishing Hange in cryptic tones, not allowing anyone else to realise what she was being told off for. You knew though. Only a matter of time before you were back in the baggy stuff, you surmised. Being that you were staring downwards, you missed one particular reaction to your new look, shards of silver glaring across the hall with a combination of amusement and intrigue.


	6. Fading Certitude

"Again."

"I've done it eight times already."

"I don't give a shit. Again."

"Fucking hell." Arms aching, you delivered another airborne blow to one of the training dummies, large wooden structure that was meant to be a titan coming under attack from your blades. Every morning had been filled with some kind of work, Levi moving you on to the physically draining sword practice and watching with a critical eye. It had been a week since your grand entrance into the mess hall and he hadn't mentioned the change in appearance once, just tutted and scowled each time he saw you. Unknown to you, Erwin had been incensed, heated argument held with Hange in his office along with the other two men. As a steely stare mentally critiqued your methods, he recalled the exchange from seven days ago.

It had all stared during what was a routine meeting, a catch up to discuss plans and also talk about the potentially dangerous woman in their numbers. This was a regular occurrence, nothing odd there but then the Commander had spoken harshly.

"Hange, what do you think you're doing?"

"What?"

"Giving (F/N) those clothes?"

"Oh come on, surely it doesn't matter anymore?"

"It does. How are we supposed to keep her meek if we don't provide a sense of low self esteem?"

"You're cruel, Erwin."

"Sometimes we have to be in order to attain our goals."

"I still say we're in for a fucking disappointment."

"How so, Levi?" He had sat down in front of his superior, bored expression keeping any sign of knowledge at bay as he ran a finger over the badly cleaned desk.

"She can't do anything."

"And why do you say that?"

"Because I've fucked with her enough to know there's no hidden power, no ability waiting to spring out and save the world. I say we put her into normal service, use (F/N) as she was intended - like a soldier."

"But if we do that, who's going to dust my bookshelves?"

"Mike, you don't have any fucking books."

"I might do. You don't know." Erwin sighed and stopped the squabble before it could morph into anything more.

"Quiet. Here's how it is. We keep the plan for now. Play it safe. And Hange? She can have the clothes but don't think I'll forget about this."

"Sorry Sir."

The official business had concluded shortly after that, leaving Levi time to hunt you down and continue with ordering you around. It was for show to an extent, keep up the facade and pretend you were essentially worth nothing more than a slave, however the early activities each day would carry on in secret. Levi had to make sure you could be depended upon and he was becoming increasingly convinced that the whole premise of your being here had been nothing but bullshit. So he would mould you into a force to be relied on, a strong fighter yet compliant house maid, such a wonderful juxtaposition. The man wasn't quite ready to say goodbye to his servant, the one who now came with feminine curves at all times, not just when in uniform.

Thinking of uniform, Levi turned his attention back to the present, a panting form standing before him with a scowl as it spoke. "And you tell me to concentrate?"

"I was figuring out how to tell you what a shit job you've done."

"What? Look! The thing has no neck left!"

"Tch. Took you long enough. That's it for today. I'll take my tea in my quarters." Sighing, you translated the statement correctly as 'bring me my damn drink.' Back in your room you took a cold shower, yelping and jumping around under the hideous water, cursing whoever hadn't made the right moves to heat the tanks. You heard a few more screams and surmised it wasn't just yourself having such a disastrous start to the day. Fleeing the icy assault, you wrapped a rough towel across your body, shivering and shaking whilst rubbing vehemently to regain some semblance of warmth. Stupid fucking bastards.

The kitchens were busy, people rushing to supply food for hungry bellies but not yours, there was the matter of tea to be considered. Swiftly sorting the items, you placed them on a tray, nodding to others as you passed by. A shake began in your muscles, previous work out manifesting in the annoying tremor as you reached the relevant room just in time. Pushing the door open with your back, the precarious china rattled and you rushed to the desk, slamming your goods down clumsily. Levi was nowhere to be seen however the low growl was as clear as day. "What the fuck are you doing?"

"My arms gave way." Massaging some life back into the offended limbs, you glanced up to see a casually dressed Captain, hair still wet from what you hoped had been a chilly shower. Judging by the look on his face, it most certainly wasn't a happy wash that he'd endured. Silver eyes stared over, still getting used to the new you, taking in the way your white shirt clung to your figure, dark trousers that sat perfectly. With a shake of the head, Levi rid himself of the thoughts that had invaded his head uninvited and pointed at the tray.

"Clean that up." Tea had been spilt thanks to your violent delivery and you sighed, cloth pulled from your back pocket to attend to the order. Glancing up, you saw you were joined at the desk by the grumpy man, one who didn't seem to be enjoying himself as much today. Usually there would be a small smirk or faint sign of delight at watching you carry out the menial task but not now, only contemplation.

"What's up?"

"Don't start that therapy shit on me, (F/N)." It sealed the deal, no sarcasm in your name. Something was wrong. Paying attention to the spillage, you kept half an eye on his movements, the way he sat more slumped than normal, blacker circles under his lids. Looking as nonchalant as possible, you hummed a bit and moved the crockery carefully to mop up underneath the items.

"You've not been sleeping." Not a question, only a simple statement, one which was met by an almost non-existent grumble.

"No fucking shit." Tossing the fabric to one side, you placed steady hands on the wooden surface and gave the man your best serious expression, one employed with others when they returned minus their comrades and friends but still reticent to talk. The glare you were met by was stony and most definitely not in the mood to chat. "I said don't."

"It might help."

"How? How are you going to be of any fucking help to me? All you know is how to wash up and keep things tidy and to be honest, you're not even any good at that."

"Fair enough. You know where I am." It wasn't that you'd expected a sudden outpouring of emotion but the words had still cut deeper than they possibly should have. Closing the door quietly, you sighed and made for the kitchens again, previous hunger abating with every step. Levi had snapped at you many times in the past, would continue to in the future however this time your worth was called into question despite his apparent efforts to make you an efficient fighter. What exactly was going on?

The Captain's already bleak demeanour grew more foggy, clouds of anger filling his mind as he scowled down at the tea you'd made for him, tray now spotless. Why had he said that? True, he wasn't one for open discussions but perhaps that'd been a little too harsh, especially seeing as you were only trying to be of assistance. There was no good reason for what was in reality a massive sulk, no indication as to it's origins other than fatigue and a fraught life of loss and pain. That was an everyday truth though, so why was today worse? It could be because all attempts at inspiring action in you had been useless, each passing day you trained and wore those clothes taking you a step away from something monumental. Sipping the warm beverage, he instead put it all down to the god awful shower and began shuffling through some stupid paperwork, making a mental note to get you back to do most of it for him later.

~~~~~~

A familiar face came into view as your broom swept the halls during the mid-morning lull, most others out training or doing something far more interesting. Dust spun around in small irritating clouds, threatening to cause a sneeze or coughing fit as tiny specks invaded your nostrils. Outside would be nice and fresh, you decided. A lovely breeze or gentle wind to ease the tickling sensation and restore you to a clear-headed state but instead here you were, confined and choked by the claustrophobia brought about by both physical and mental imprisonment. The more you thought about it all, that's what this truly was, a prison sentence. At least one person seemed to be willing to provide some alleviation from the stifling atmosphere, yet even he appeared to have turned all asshole on you. Placing full concentration on the newcomer, you smiled weakly and enquired as to what the blonde wanted.

"Hey Mike. Nearly finished here if you can wait a minute?"

"I don't need anything done. Well, not work related." The mischievous look in his eyes said it all and you shook your head.

"What are you plotting now?"

"Me? Oh, nothing much. I want you to get something for me." Coming close, the man leant against the wall and spoke quietly in hushed tones, keeping this a secret. "Erwin's stupid tie."

"Why? That's not a prank, that's just stealing."

"And? Won't it be fun to see him flapping about trying to find it?" Boredom meant that this was most certainly going to go down and you smiled devilishly. 

"Alright, you're on. What's in it for me?"

"A day off." His words rung in your ears, three monosyllabic utterances that surely couldn't be true, they'd all have to agree to it so you called him on the obvious false promise.

"You can't give me that on your own."

"Yes I can. I'll make sure the others leave you alone."

"Good luck with that. Ok, in the interest of curiosity, go for it. Deal." Shaking strongly, the pair of you sealed the agreement and gave a short nod in recognition of the newly forged alliance. Mike's part of the bargain would never materialise, you knew it but still wanted to see how far he would actually go to make it happen. Clearing up the last of the dirt, you carelessly threw the small pile of fluff and muck out of an open window before returning your tools to the cupboard, scheming how to obtain the Commander's hideous bolo tie.

You hadn't been allowed much chance as yet again, Mr Moody caught up with your sorry form, tracking you down as if he could smell as efficiently as Mike. It was nearly lunchtime but there seemed little prospect of food as papers were stacked before you, mountains of white leaves that threatened to topple down at any moment and engulf you in their thin embrace. He must save this shit up, you grumbled internally and inked yet another number in where Levi had put the wrong digit. For someone so high and mighty, he really did fall short of the mark when it came to mathematics. Sitting cross legged on the floor, you surrounded the area in documents that were arranged in order of importance and also in matching mounds depending on subject.

It was better than stable duty so you enjoyed the shift in job. Frowning deeply, (e/c) eyes ran over the words which meant little, manifests of stock and orders for extra supplies such as hay, gas and bread. The man you assisted rested back in his seat, cup in hand with a delicate grip as he watched you intently, the way you chewed your bottom lip when calculating a sum, creases above your nose that became more furrowed at times and how your body was bent forwards, nearly touching the sheets of scratchy writing. Whatever gripes he was battling with earlier had flown away alongside a small trip to a nearby town, a few luxuries obtained which now sat safely in his desk. All that remained was a distinct and impatient need to investigate, so he commenced the interrogation, holding nothing back.

"Why do you carry on with this shit?"

"Because you told me to." The mumble came from lips that were being tapped by the pen, gaze still down as the point was completely missed.

"No you fucking idiot. All of this. Why put up with it?" Laying the instrument to the side, you shuffled round to stare at the one who was questioning gruffly but without malice.

"I have no choice."

"Of course you do. You're not a little kid, you can make your own fucking decisions." Levi really was intrigued to find out what made you tick, break down the barrier and obtain a better answer than the fact you were instructed to do this. If the training was to be useful he had to understand you as a person, know your psyche and be able to see strengths and weaknesses so this was something of an evaluation. Beckoning, the pale man invited you to join him in a more comfortable position, other hand pointing to the chair opposite and with a huff, you pulled yourself up and onto the wooden frame, hard surface not much better than the floor. Legs tingled as blood began to filter back into the recently deprived muscles, shots of invisible, fuzzy pins impaled inwards making you twitch.

"I told you, Levi. I…"

"Cut the crap. People don't just do what complete strangers say, let alone crazy ass grannies."

"But the visions…"

"Could've been engineered. Planted by a sharp mind without you realising."

"Ok, you want to go down that route? Fine. I obeyed the orders blindly, ended up here. Now my question is this; why are YOU all following instructions?" Throwing it back in his face, you crossed your arms and waited for the hypocrisy to begin, aware that there was a more intricate web that lay beneath this and it most certainly did not end with you. There had to be a bigger story, a damn good reason for your presence here. Sure, you endured a lot however so did they, an extra mouth to feed, extra person to take care of, one less bed to go around. So your superiors also had a motive. Levi smirked and poured another drink, second mug filled and shoved slowly over whilst he congratulated you without sound. Well played, (F/N). Well played.


	7. Unpredictable

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies, a mini chapter dump on the way

Silence. No talking. Only eyes connected in a war of attrition, neither one of your stubborn minds willing to give up and wave the white flag of surrender. The scent of black tea filled your senses, warm liquid begging to be imbibed so you complied with the call of thirst, gulping in a rather uncouth manner and hoping to piss the guy off. It didn't work; all that your move had prompted was yet another smug expression from across the desk. Almost three minutes had passed by your reckoning, three whole minutes of nothing but glares and sips. Your question remained unanswered yet it didn't faze you, resolve stony and steadfast - you would find some truths out, right here, right now. Enough was enough.

Levi sensed the way in which you held yourself, defiance linked into impatience like best friends, hand in hand and ready to take on the world. It was rather attractive, a strong oath to stay unmoved until you had what you wanted. He wasn't about to tell all, but chose to allow you a slice of reality. Arm over the back of his chair, the Captain nodded once and broke the stalemate.

"Alright brat. You win. We were also told to."

"Told to what? Keep me here as a maid?"

"Yes. That's about the extent of it."

"So why did you agree?" Now, how far did he go? Was there still a chance that something did lie within this woman who sat glowering at him? Even if not, it was too much fun to pass up on seeing that wrath once more.

"Money." He watched as your brows lowered further, almost eclipsing your orbs when your head tilted downwards in a look of pure hatred. Your next word was growled through gritted teeth, seething with animosity.

"What."

"Oh, didn't you know (F/N)?" Levi placed his cup down and inspected his nails, boredom personified as he sighed. "Erwin was paid to take you in." That was the final straw, back well and truly broken by the revelation. Standing suddenly, you sent the seat clattering to the floor and pointed vehemently at the infuriating man.

"I've had it. You lot can go fuck yourselves. I'm out of here."

"To where, exactly? Am I correct in thinking your village doesn't exist any more? Family forced into hard labour just to survive? So tell me, (L/N), is this so bad?" Unfortunately, he was right. After the wall was breached four years ago, life became harder by the week. Whilst you had no direct hit by the titans, displacement and the never ending chain of events led to the fact that your community was inevitably swallowed up by those in power, turned into a kind of camp where the poorer members of the population found themselves forced into intense farming, ensuring the remaining members of mankind could be provided with sustenance. All of that happened after you had left, old home destroyed and reached by the all encompassing government. Guilt didn't come into it, downright self-condemnation prevailed but you had no choice, you didn't. You really didn't. Right? Slumping back down, you picked up the fallen seat and delivered a meek response.

"Fine. You've made your point, Levi. So what now? I'm just supposed to accept that? Live with the knowledge that I'm here because of currency?"

"Yes. What option do you have?" Studying your reaction, grey eyes flashed in anticipation. Would you snap or instead accept fate? A bit of both, it seemed.

"I might not have a great array of directions to go in, but really? I'm paid for?"

"Handsomely, so I've heard." Keeping it an enigma, the male sat up, elbow on the desk. "It doesn't matter, though. What does is the reason why."

"And that would be…?"

"I have no fucking idea." Exasperation didn't quite touch how you felt, soul ripped apart in strips of raw, exposed feeling. You were done.

"I'd better finish up." Dropping to the floor, you started up the monotonous reworking of the slips of paper, mind troubled and spinning with thoughts. So, Erwin took money to have you stay here as a servant, pander to your moment of awakening or whatever that stupid old woman had created. Paranoia, more than likely. How had you been so imbecilic to believe that you of all people had some important part to play in the struggle? A fight which had technically been on hold for four years but still raged on outside the walls, alongside the battle faced by humanity trapped inside. Essentially, you were imprisoned too, parallel existence with your estranged family and friends. At least you had…what did you have? Freedom? Shit no. You might as well have been back out there digging and tending to fields. Whilst thinking, you hadn't noticed a figure by your side and jumped when it spoke.

"Don't fucking sulk, (F/N)."

"I'm not. What are you doing, anyway?"

"Sorting out this shit, what does it look like?" You stayed quiet after that and smiled weakly, allowing a moment to occur which was entirely unexpected. Levi sat in a mirror of your pose, legs crossed as pale fingers sifted through the manifests and memos, halving the time needed to get through the heaped backlogs. Luckily you'd mopped thoroughly in here recently, as had he by the looks of it so there was no fear of dirtying one's trousers. The man hadn't intended on upsetting you, had hoped to turn the leaked information into rage and finally give you a purpose. It seemed that would never happen, of that he was now sure so made a personal promise to stop trying and just get on with life, whatever that meant. Sniffing with disdain, Levi passed a sheet over and flapped it in your face. "This one's wrong."

"I know." Studying the numbers, you placed the end of the pen on the erroneous one. "You wrote it."

"No I didn't." Snatching it back, furious grey eyes scanned and scrutinised, looking for any possible way to prove that it wasn't his fault.

"Yea, you did. I'm using different ink, that was done earlier. It's ok, you know. Everyone has flaws."

"Flaws?" Staring across, he searched your innocent face for any sign of a joke or jibe but found none, only an honest and open expression. So this is how she does it, he pondered. Lures them in with that sweet, sugary facade and breaks down the barriers until they can't help but spill their guts. Clever. But why bother? What was in it for you?

"Mmm hmm. Levi, no one's perfect. Not even you. So stop pretending that nothing gets you down or that you're some kind of emotionless rock. You need help sometimes too, just like the rest of us." One badly calculated number had led to this, a probing conversation that had taken such a turn from the previous one.

"Piss off, (L/N)." Giving in, the offending item was offered so you could correct it and you complied in silence, making no smart remarks or comments. There had blatantly been no power behind his last grumble, said only for show and you didn't want to chase away any chance of cracking that stony exterior. A chip was removed now and you hoped no more would come tumbling down unless you were around. Not that you deserved it or anything, but you truly felt your forte lay in being there for others to listen and advise, console, assist. Anything. The next words spoken were off topic and not what you wanted to hear.

"Morning training's over."

"What? Why?" One thing that had lightened your days recently had been cruelly torn away, screwed up and thrown to the side with that statement.

"You're more than capable with the gear. What you need is strength." A glimmer of hope sparked within and you held your breath for the whole story. "Hand to hand."

"Really?! I can spar with the others?"

"Why not?" Grinning, you sprung to your knees and sent white leaves flying, launching over to wrap your arms around the man who had allowed this exhilarating prospect. It was the only thing you could think of to do and didn't have the coherence to realise exactly how out of character and potentially inappropriate you were being. Levi wasn't sure what to make of the display at first, a person attached to his body that was not wholly unwelcome however definitely awkward. "Get the fuck off of me."

"Sorry. I'm just so…I can't believe it! I haven't fought in so long!"

"(F/N)…"

"Oh, right…yea." Removing yourself from the impromptu embrace, you blushed slightly at the girlish reaction but didn't move away fully, simply sat and stared with a wide smile. It made the Captain uncomfortable, narrow silver lines glaring back as embarrassment gave way to another sensation, one which had to stop immediately. It must. This can't carry on, he scolded to himself. Break eye contact now, get on with the work. Drag yourself away from those (e/c)…

A harsh bang at the door caused both occupants of the room to flinch and snap out of the strange dream state, mildly flustered and uneasy as papers were shuffled officially, tidying the mess your gesture had created whilst queries sprung into your mind. What the hell? Why couldn't I move? Why didn't he move? And why the fuck did I just hug him?! A growl granted the visitor entry and Petra's face appeared, mild as always.

"Hi, I thought you might be here, (F/N)! Mike needs you." Ah yes, the fiendish mission hadn't been completed and you rolled your eyes.

"I know what he wants and it can wait."

"He was very insistent. You know how he can get. I'll help out here." Sighing, you struggled with your next actions. Maybe you could get some lunch too while you were free, but something was holding you in place, reluctant to leave the thick atmosphere behind.

"Go. We can discuss this later." Levi sounded odd, dismissive voice tinged with uncertain tones. He wasn't looking any more, back on his feet and glaring down at what was no longer your problem, apparently. "And not a word." That last part was for you alone. All that had been spoken on the subject of money had to be kept private, buried inside. It would be difficult.

"Ok. See you, Petra. Good luck." She frowned and watched you scuff out and into the hallway.

"What's going on, Levi?"

"Nothing. She's just being a little shit." The woman wasn't fooled but ignored the gnawing curiosity, respecting her superior's wishes and beginning the clean up process.

~~~~~~

Leaning over the large desk, you fiddled with the assortment of items, chin in hand and huffs expelled every now and again. Erwin glanced across and gave up trying to do any kind of work this afternoon, pen dropped and fingers laced together in a gesture akin to a prayer as he sat his elbows on the surface.

"What's wrong, (F/N)?"

"Oh, nothing." Trailing your touch in circles, you maintained the air of being upset and made sure attention was fully on the apparently sullen woman. The object you desired was in plan view, removed along with the brown jacket when the Commander had entered earlier, surprised by the female that waited for him quietly.

"Come on, out with it."

"I'm bored, Erwin. Can I come on the expedition at the end of the week? Please?"

"No. You know you can't."

"But why?"

"(F/N), I am not getting into this conversation with you now."

"Have you got any books I could read then?" Childish eyes stared up with anticipation and the man couldn't help but smile.

"Alright. If it gets you out from under my feet." He rose and turned to select one he believed you might enjoy, pondering those on offer while you swiftly snatched the tie from the side, pocketing it covertly when the large male was distracted. "Here. This one is a particular favourite of mine." Taking the sizeable volume, you nodded and smiled warmly.

"Thank you! I'll bring it back when I'm done."

"Take your time. And (F/N)?"

"Yes?"

"One day. I promise." His genuine sorrow made you feel awful at the theft you had just carried out, kindness shown without question. It took everything to hold it together and keep calm, stop yourself admitting to the crime so you rushed out, door closed and heart pounding. This had better be worth it. Erwin shook his head. Why did people think he was so stupid? Your stare had been flicking over to his belonging constantly and now it was gone, no doubt spirited away for your blonde co-conspirator. The Commander wondered exactly what your reward was going to be.

Mike was found easily, hunted down outside thankfully so you could allow the breeze to wash over your body as pink clouds hung above, signalling the imminent sunset that would unquestionably be quite beautiful. Handing over the stolen loot, you stood strong. "You'd better keep up your side of the deal."

"Don't worry, I will. Take my room. Go change the sheets after dinner so it looks like you're working and then lock yourself in. I'll find somewhere else." A key was passed across in a hidden gesture.

"What about in the morning?" Whilst your training had ceased, combat was promised and you didn't know when.

"They probably won't take long to figure it out so just enjoy the lie in."

"Thanks, Mike!" He winked and watched as you skipped off, thoroughly enlivened by the prospect of a calm night's sleep. Little did either of you know, it would be anything but serene.


	8. Chase

"Where is she?" Levi stood in your empty room with the three others who knew of your real reason for being in the Corps. Mike kept his face unreadable as his superior shot him a look of annoyance, the Commander knowing full well that the guy had something to do with this.

"She'll be somewhere. Why do you need her anyway?"

"Because, four eyes, she hasn't finished her work."

"Petra said she helped you out instead? Unless it wasn't work she was doing, if you get my drift?"

"Hange, stop."

"Oh Erwin, I'm only joking. But they would make a cute couple."

"I swear I'll shove those shitty glasses up your ass if you don't shut the fuck up."

"None of this will help, so please, enough." The pale man gave a look of intense disgust to the female in the small living space despite the warning from the one in charge, swearing to make her pay at a later date. Partly he wanted you to complete the paperwork, although there was another reason for his search. Unfinished business. Not sure exactly what that entailed himself, Levi still had a clear sense of duty which drove him to seek you out.

"Tch. You lot are useless, I'll find her myself." He strode away, mentally checking the contents of your room in the short space of time he had been in there - gear was propped against the wall so you weren't off training in secret, boots by the door denoting uniform wasn't being worn so where the hell were you? As he paced the halls, a realisation hit. Mike hadn't spoken and Erwin had been overly interested in staring the man down, so he decided to try one place that would have ordinarily been the last on his list. Dinner was over hours ago, the last sighting of his prey occurring just after as your figure had scuttled upstairs with arms full of linen. This had to be right, your hiding place close to being exposed.

Of course the door was locked, that was presumably the whole point however the events leading up to your escape were unknown still. Standing back, Levi raised a foot and broke the entrance down easily, smashed wood exploding in shards as he strode in with authority. Sure enough, there was a lump curled up under the bedclothes, small sprig of (h/c) hair sticking out above the covers. Smirking evilly, he threw back the sheets to expose both your temporary den and more than he could possibly have banked on. You lay in a ball, underwear your only garments as you had totally forgotten to bother with any nightwear, not prepared to go find some and instead opted to stay out of sight. Until now.

"Hey! What..?"

"Get up."

"Levi, what the fuck?"

"I said get up. You're not done working yet."

"I'm practically naked!"

"Then put some fucking clothes on." Sliding to the floor on the other side of the bed, you tried to shuffle into the trousers without being seen, top pulled on swiftly just in time as legs appeared, a hand gripping tight to your arm and wrenching you to your feet. "Out. Now." Shoving with force, the man propelled you towards the stricken door and regained his hold on your limb, dragging you through empty corridors. Most people would be asleep by now, leaving the journey uninterrupted and you were forced inside of a new set of living quarters, shouting in defiance.

"Do you have to be so fucking rough?" The entrance slammed shut, lock clicked into place and livid grey eyes drilled into your brain. "What do you want? Can't I just get some rest?" Levi didn't have a full answer for that just yet, coming closer as he attempted to assess the situation. You were pissed, tired and the last query was somewhat pleading, stare begging to be left alone in peace. The feeling from this afternoon hadn't left him, an unfamiliar need to have your arms around his body once more, one which confused and aroused him in equal amounts. He had always been of the opinion that if you wanted something, you went out and got it, life was too short to worry about lost opportunities or unseized moments, however was this bordering on wrong? Only time would tell.

You saw the way he looked into your soul, examining every part with a precise glare and that flicker ignited within, the one which had been awakened when you felt his breath on your ear over a week ago and revisited again earlier after the unexpected hug. Nothing readable came from the man who stood near, merely a stretch of muscles and you could've touched him, brought him tightly into your warmth. But you didn't. Instead, you waited to discover what this was all about.

"(F/N)?"

"Yes?"

"The pen's on the desk."

"So you physically marched me down here and locked me in so I could do your work for you?"

"What else?" Levi took note of the faint glimmer of disappointment on your face and held back a smirk. "Now hurry up, I don't want to keep you from your precious sleep."

"Un fucking believable." Griping, you snatched the item up and sat on the chair heavily, sifting through the papers to locate the incomplete pages. "Fucking dick."

"Enough of your lip, (L/N)."

"Or what? You'll make me carry out menial tasks when I should be in bed? Oh right, I already am!"

"Don't push me."

"Again, I'm not afraid. Did I do something to upset you in a former life? Shut up and let me get this over with." No warning was given as a hand clamped under your jaw, moving your head back harshly so you were made to stare upwards into his expressionless face.

"I told you not to fucking push me." Bending, Levi hovered above and you considered lifting your knee to catch him between the legs, but dismissed that idea as soon as it had materialised; there was no way you would come out the winner after a move like that. The two of you held one another's gaze flawlessly, never wavering regardless of the internal turmoil inside of you both, a singular subject spinning through conflicted minds. Neither having any clue where this appetite had abruptly come from, you remained in place, practically drowning in equally captivating pools of colour, almost losing any hold on lucidity. In a display of coherence, the man blinked once, trance broken with a flick of the lids and he released his grip, sweeping round to take up position on the other side of the desk.

The drumming of your heart was surely audible, banging loudly against sturdy ribs and sending blood racing with deafening pulses in your ears. Levi tried to appear unaffected, cool exterior contradicting the personal schism that was currently raging as he observed how you got on with the work as if nothing had happened. He knew the woman before him had the same rift of opinion, had seen it so raw and honest so he began to wonder just why he walked away. Uncharted territory? Fear of how far it might have gone? No real reason was available as to the origins of the new found want but whatever the explanation, it was probably best that the carnal lust didn't come to fruition, he assured himself. That would have been an incredible slip in judgement and self control.

Inking in the relevant figures, you moved quickly to reach the last one, desperate to leave but also insanely interested to see what might go on if you stayed. You supposed the close training might have been a factor, contributing to what was admittedly purely human nature - spend more time with someone and things start to enter people's minds, things that were dormant stirred by proximity. There was certainly an additional layer to all of this though, a deep impulse that may have always laid sleeping, spurred on by recent events. Sighing, you stacked everything up and rose.

"Can I go now, please." Timid voice splitting through the silence, you kept your eyes down and waited to find out if you would be allowed to exit. The sound of chair legs on the bare floor let you know he was on the move, door unlocked and held open without a word. Slipping through swiftly, you practically ran back to your room, thoughts still contradictory as the destination was reached. Trying to block out the image of Levi, you got into your night shirt and crawled under the covers, cuddling in to attempt rest, something that would no doubt be impossible now. Around half an hour was filled with fractured pictures, imagination unwilling to let you have peace so in the end you gave up, deciding to walk circles round the small living area and wear yourself out.

The noise you'd been accustomed to for over a year meant nothing at first, barely registered but as you turned to see who was invading your personal space this time, the sound of a door shutting became all too different from the norm. It wasn't someone coming to tell you to clean the windows, help with the blockage in the shared toilets, sort out the stables. No, this was an individual with a totally unrelated purpose and the faint light of the moon gave a glimpse of steadfast features on the man's porcelain face. Levi said nothing, only closed the gap between the two of you and in seconds your lips were connected, kissing as if the last day of humanity had been announced, time to make your amends and do what you had always wanted to before it was too late.

Instead of pushing him away as you perhaps should have done, your arms pulled the man in, bodies welded together in a kind of urgent insistence. Hands on your back felt like hot iron, palms burning into flesh through thin fabric and you gripped tightly with yours, discovering the muscular form beneath his own shirt. Devouring each other, a flick on your lower lip impatiently requested further intimacy and you complied, just as you would do if he ordered you to collect the laundry. Tongues dragged roughly together, small resonant tones of yearning coming from your throats and you gave into the heated moment with ease, touch wandering to explore every inch within your reach. Levi cradled the back of your head in his grasp, other hand trailing down towards your waist, hip, hem of the short garment you wore…

As quickly as it had begun, the embrace was broken, panted breaths shared as the man stepped away slightly, eyes gleaming brighter than the celestial object that illuminated the room. He smirked, mouth open a crack to gasp in air and the tiny lift of an eyebrow said more than his next words. "See you tomorrow, (F/N)." No sardonic drawl, no emphasis on your name.

"If you're lucky, Levi." Giving as good as you got, you smiled sweetly and cocked your head, making an already prominent stirring in the man's trousers beg for something else. He wouldn't let that happen though, not yet. Sure, seize the day but whatever the fuck this situation was demanded care and timing. It couldn't go any further right now, boundaries were still being discovered, true personalities unearthed and there was still the matter of potentially rousing a dangerous trait, something he hadn't been able to ignore despite his promise. You were content with ending the night here too, a taste of the guy who had become suddenly and increasingly more interesting was enough for the moment. If this were to go anywhere, drawing out the delicious culmination would surely add a dimension of excitement. A couple of weeks ago and this would have been unthinkable, two people at constant loggerheads becoming close seemed laughable however the bond had grown, shown you a side that had never existed until now.

You'd be lying if you said he wasn't attractive, the amount of smouldering control in those eyes alone told you that but also the time you had been in his presence just added to the clear truth - there was more to the man than the stony exterior and brash language, so much to learn and enjoy, a whole persona to get to know.

Ten minutes earlier and Levi had been doing his own circuit, pacing through his room as he mentally argued with himself. He knew what he wanted to do, was aware of how it could be a massive mistake but one side had won in a landslide vote, all ending in his arrival in your room in the middle of the night. And now as he prowled back to his own home, the Captain was happy that the snap decision had paid off royally, cemented his belief that there was something about you, an attraction born out of physical desire as well as psychological; your ability to be kind hearted and concerned for those around you despite how you were treated was admirable, the determined soul that kept going day after day in the face of adversity was strong and both factors simply added to the magnetic pull that Levi felt himself dragged into deeper with every hour. Strange. He'd never come across this before, but then he'd never come across anyone quite like you before, either.


	9. Inevitable Disappointment

Breakfast was uneventful in that no fights broke out, no arguments between charged soldiers, upcoming expedition usually keeping people on edge and ready to snap at any given moment. However today was different, a sense of ease throughout the ranks and you watched those you lived with cordially going about their morning routine. It happened from time to time, strange serenity landing on the gathered bodies like a comfort blanket, hugging them tight and soothing with fluffy strokes. Good natured banter rang through the hall, peace unbroken until a figure stumbled into the room, hair dishevelled and uniform unkempt. Mike looked like shit to be honest, a man who had most certainly not had a restful sleep. You'd actually forgotten about him and where he might have laid his head down, all to give you a quiet night in exchange for the theft.

His gaze found yours and he made a beeline directly for your lone table in the corner, face grim and serious. Shrinking back, you shot a look over to where three others sat, begging for help but receiving nothing but an assortment of useless expressions. Hange grinned, ready to see what might happen. The large brows of the Commander flicked upwards as he smiled, glad to witness a form of comeuppance in payment for your actions yesterday. And that left Levi. The man who had behaved so passionately last night in your room, the buzz of his lips still running through your veins as his smug satisfaction stared over, faint hint of enjoyment on his mouth.

"What the hell, (F/N)? Why did you kick down my door? Do you have any idea where I slept and all along you were in your own damn bed?!"

"Mike…I can explain…" Hands up in submission, you were aware of all eyes on the impending altercation, hushed silence dropping across those gathered. In a bold move, you chose to tell the truth. Well, in part anyway. "Ask Levi. It's his fault." A small choke was heard from the relevant table, noise indicating that tea had nearly been ejected and you held your breath, waiting for the fallout. The angry male glared down for a moment and spun, stalking towards the accused.

"Well?"

"Well what?" The pale man was icy cool despite the recent cough and held his own, throwing a question back to counter the one just given to him. For what felt like the hundredth time this month, Erwin reined in his subordinates.

"Our meeting has been brought forward. Now." Protests rang out as the fun came to an end and a silvery gaze was pointed in your direction, eyes flashing with an intent known only by you whilst the quartet left for their gathering.

Once inside the office, they took up their usual positions, two of them still staring each other down. "I don't care what is going on here. Mike, my tie?" Muttering under his breath, the culprit handed the item over, head snapping up suddenly to stare at Levi. An almost imperceptible sniff was offered, missed by the other two but clear as day between a pair of wordlessly battling members of the hierarchy. Cutting the stupidly gifted man off before he could start anything, Erwin held up a hand. "We'll be heading out in a few days. I need you all to focus. No silly pranks, no bickering. Just act like grown ups, please?" A lack of response allowed him to continue. "Thank you. Now, Levi? Get someone to fix the broken door. Mike? Don't try anything like that again. Hange? How are your experiments going?"

"Well, not great. (F/N) hasn't shown anything unusual in any respect. Her blood remains the same, no amount of provocation seems to work."

"I told you. She's just like us. Fucking normal."

"I wouldn't call you normal, Levi." The woman grinned and carried on under the intense grey stare. "We haven't exhausted all routes. Think about it, we've concentrated on making her mad. What about if it's to do with the opposite?"

"That doesn't work either." Mike's snort met the admission, one of total understanding but the others frowned, waiting for the dark haired man to explain fully. "I gave her some chocolate." Laughter sprang from the tall blonde who just walked away into the corner, shaking his head and Erwin sat at the desk looking wholly unconvinced.

"Ok so it's not that either then. Even I'd go bat shit crazy over chocolate." Hange's statement caused further giggles from across the room but those out of the loop ignored it, presuming there was some kind of private joke which the often mischievous male hadn't let them in on. "So what are we going to do?" Calm contemplation seeped through the four. A year's worth of attempts had been fruitless and they were now faced with a situation, a choice - carry on or make some changes. Levi's preference was the latter, something that was already in progress and would continue in combat later today. He was sure that the Commander wasn't going to be on board with that so pre-empted any kind of resistance.

"Her skill with the manoeuvre gear is impressive. She just needs to work on her strength, which is why I've arranged hand to hand training this afternoon."

"Levi…"

"Wait, Erwin. Just hear me out." Scowling over, the shorter man held his superior's stare in silent insolence, weighing up his options and considering every possible avenue that might be travelled. A nod was given and the Captain began to explain. "(F/N) has a lot to offer as a soldier and I can bring that out. Obviously it will require close observation, although I seriously doubt there's any fucking fear of some sudden epiphany."

"Why are you so sure?"

"Like I said before, it's all bullshit."

"Thank you for the scientific summary, Levi." Erwin rubbed a weary hand across his forehead. He hated being on the back foot. "Maybe we should bring her in on this. Find out if the truth sparks a kind of realisation."

"Is that wise?"

"I can't see any other choice, Hange. What do you suggest?" Yet again, no one spoke. A potential weapon might be among their numbers, or had they all become so caught up in the story that the wood couldn't be seen for the trees? Was the past twelve months all a waste of effort? "Alright. Do the training, Levi. All of us are to be on hand. After that, we can make a decision." Nods were shared and the meeting moved on to more banal topics, official business and the matter of the now completed forms, ones which had been your task yesterday.

~~~~~~

Rain was looming again, dark clouds rolling in across the horizon to form a kind of meeting place right above where you stood. The air was fresh yet full of warning, downpour threatening with every passing minute. You shivered and glanced around at all those in attendance, some fellow graduates who had been outside the walls like they were supposed to, a few notable ones missing. Spending those three years in training together had created a bond, one which had been sliced through expertly by your servitude. They had all grown together, fought together, mourned together. You were on hand to pick up the pieces and provide solace but it didn't quite measure up to the support they must have leant to each other. Feeling like something of a fraud, you focussed and faced the next adversary, breaths deep and measured, heart still pounding from the last scuffle.

"Hey (F/N)? They letting you out to play today?"

"Yea, seems that way Brynn. How are you doing? Honestly?" The last time the you'd properly spoken, she had just returned from a mission minus the man you both knew, the man she gave her heart to. It had been gut wrenching to watch her crumble from the loss, feel the hot tears on your skin as she wept uncontrollably into your embrace. All of that came flooding back, a raven haired presence near by that you had been aware of the whole time now seeming incredibly foreboding. Whatever you and Levi were embarking on was going to constantly be at risk - life was fleeting in this line of work. On one hand, that could be reason enough to continue and grasp onto what joy was in reach, however on the other it might all end in serious pain.

"I'm ok I think, (F/N). Don't get me wrong, I miss Leo every single day but you just move on, right?" There was a sadness in her brown eyes, a deep sorrow that betrayed her overly chirpy voice.

"It's alright to still be grieving, Brynn."

"I know. I have to push it all down though, nearly got myself killed on the last expedition."

"Be careful, yea? And come talk to me if you need to. Sorry I haven't been around."

"That's ok, you've got your own weird shit to deal with. What's that all about, anyway? I always wondered?"

"I have no fucking idea, Brynn. It's getting better, though. Look, I'm actually allowed to train!"

"Doesn't seem like training. Come on ladies, get to it!" Dita had come into view, reminding you of what you were supposed to be doing.

"Sorry. Ok, no hard feelings, (F/N)?"

"Nope." Grinning at the woman who had been a friend in years past, you hoped this would be the start of regaining a sense of being, serving a purpose like the rest of them and rebuilding lost ties. The fact that all four squad leaders were here along with the Commander hadn't been lost on anyone, bodies all fighting with increased vigour to show their capabilities. In reality, they weren't watching anyone but you, apart from Dita of course. For some reason he hadn't been included in the trusted group. Blocking and throwing attacks, you felt alive, renewed strength coming out in waves and the kiss from last night surfaced again, any concerns about the future dissipating with each move. What will be, will be.

"Right, switch!" The man in the headscarf ordered new partners and you squeezed your recent adversary's shoulder, eyes telling her not to bottle everything up. Turning with a smile, you came face to face with the next in line, fifth duel of the gruelling session ready to commence. A few whispers seeped across the thick air, storm circling above now on the brink of explosion, electricity coming from the blackened sky as your mouth dropped in shock. Levi had removed his brown jacket, cravat stored somewhere safe and he stood before you with arms crossed over a white shirt.

"You get me dirty, you're washing everyone's fucking uniforms. Got it?" The need to play was in the fore of your mind, any surprise gone and you cracked your knuckles loudly.

"Better stay off the ground then, Captain." Rolling the title out in a syrupy snarl, flashes of silver met the challenge and you started to side step, eyes on the foe at all times. When you'd been sparring, all of your previous workouts came flowing back and when combined with your elation at being allowed to join in, it created a serious force. Or so you hoped. This wasn't a recruit you'd be pitted against, this was apparently the strongest member of the Corps. Others had commenced their fights, half hearted attempts as they kept a close eye on what might occur. Levi had decided to get involved against Erwin's wishes, show the blonde that there really wasn't anything to fear inside of you and the best way to do that was take matters into his own hands.

"Stop stalling (L/N) and get on with it."

"Afraid to make the first move?"

"You know I'm not." Smirking, you felt your stomach churn at the intent and wished that everyone else wasn't here anymore, just the two of you about to come together in a flurry of physical activity. Clearing your mind, you recalled the time when you'd blown a fuse, wildly hit and kicked at the man and he had been able to dodge the flails with ease, contain you swiftly. This would take more precision, you mused and gave a slight flinch forwards, testing the waters. Levi didn't react, unfazed by your fake attempt and tutted. "Is that it?"

"Patience. I'm getting to know the enemy."

"Well hurry up because I don't want to be out here when that shitty rain starts." Those superior to you were observing, aware that no signs of anything out of the ordinary had shone through as yet but your pairings up to this point had been easy.

"I hope he doesn't go too hard."

"I'm sure he won't, Hange."

"Will you break it up if he does, Erwin? I don't like seeing (F/N) getting hit."

"She can hold her own." The woman wasn't impressed, hands clutched up at her chest as she prepared to witness yet more violence. Levi grew tired of the inaction all to easily, just as you planned. What you hadn't planned was how brutal and quick it all happened. Of course you knew there was no chance of victory, yet you'd kind of hoped to put up a bit of resistance, show some power but that went flying out the window along with any pride. Fists showered down, your legs were swept to the side all in a matter of seconds and once more a body dropped onto your prone one, arms twisted up your back and face in the dirt. Shit.

"Well that was boring."

"Nmph!"

"What? Are you trying to speak, (L/N)? Give me a good excuse? Say you weren't ready?"

"Argnh!" Spitting soil from your mouth, you managed to raise your head and growled. "Fuck you, Levi."

"Wishful thinking." Struggling under his ridiculously heavy form, you managed to find a way to move one leg and calculated the distance between your foot and his ass. Flicking the limb up with vicious force, you heard a small shout and took advantage of the short lived lapse in concentration, spinning sideways out of his clutch. Springing up, you threw yourself at him with a battle cry but he was too fast. Again. Your wrists were grabbed, a boot in your chest and the world spun in sickening spirals, back connecting harshly onto the ground, pale face looming close. "Give up?"

"I don't have much choice, do I?"

"You always have a choice. Prove us all wrong, be someone."

"What do you mean, prove you all wrong?"

"Its obvious, no? Everyone thinks you're worthless. Good for nothing but menial fucking work." You knew what was going on, that provocation coming out again. It infuriated you, not what he said but the fact you still had no idea why this was being dished out. Unknown to you both, everyone else had stopped and watched the unfolding argument, aware of your penchant for squabbling but this was something entirely unexpected. Brynn saw the way you tensed up, an action witnessed before and she hoped that some kind of righteous vengeance would come bursting out, let those who kept you as a slave see the wrath.

"You're going to tell me exactly what the FUCK is going on Levi. Now. I'm tired of this shit."

"Oh you're tired. A thousand fucking apologies."

"Seriously, I mean it. Get the fuck off of me and start FUCKING TALKING!" Eyes burnt into Levi's skull and he swore he could make out some red tints in there. Erwin, Hange and Mike held their breaths and the man on top of you widened his stare slightly, all sure that the time had arrived, ready to experience whatever was on the cards. As it turned out, nothing was on the cards, the cards didn't even exist and all you did was continue glaring up with insistence. In a flurry of movement, the Captain was on his feet and you propped up on your elbows, seeing the way he looked to the others, arms raised in a shrug only to be dropped back down in fatigue.

"Told you."

"Told them what?! WHAT DO YOU FUCKING WANT FROM ME?!" Brain frazzled, you scrabbled to an upright position and stormed off, leaving a sea of confused faces in your wake. Fucking dicks, the lot of them. Those guys thought they were so good, walking around making you do all the shit no one else wanted to and now they seemed to be messing with your mind, expecting a kind of revelation. You had nothing though, only that regretful decision to ever come here in the first place and a ball of seething anger inside your chest. That was it. You were through with their shit. Especially Levi's.


	10. Facts Of The Matter

Halls were stalked through, people snapped at, boots slammed on the stone floors. For half an hour you'd been prowling around the headquarters, trying to make sense of everything but failing miserably. What were they up to? Obviously it had something to do with the reason you were here, why they had been paid to be your keepers however that was as far as your imagination got, drawing a blank from that point onwards. Answers. That's what you needed and soon, grip on reality fading as lightning flashed through the corridors. A shadowy corner came into view and you considered just curling up in a ball, sitting in the dark until all of this went away. Before you could make that decision, a hand shot from your potential hiding place and pulled you in, back shoved against the bricks as shining slits of mercury held your unwavering gaze.

"I've been fucking looking for you, brat."

"And now you've found me. Well done."

"I don't appreciate your sarcasm, (L/N)."

"I don't appreciate your games, Levi." Hissing the words, you remained steady and waited for some kind of explanation. None was offered, eyes connected in silence and in a split second both people moved in unison, open mouths together instantly, hands groping at anything they could find. The tight shirt under your touch was damp, as was the hair you raked fingers through and a small thought managed to worm it's way into your otherwise occupied brain - he'd been caught in the storm whilst trying to locate you. Pushing that down, you pressed your hips against Levi's, grinding action reciprocated as he grabbed hold of your ass roughly, tongues fighting violently like you were back out on the sparring ground.

"Shit…" The man moved from your lips as he whispered, trailing kisses over your warm neck and forcing his body closer still, palms slipping underneath your waist band to get a handful of bare cheeks.

"Levi…fuck…what are you doing?"

"What the fuck do you think?" Mumbling against your flesh, he came upwards to envelop your pout once more, squeaks of desire rumbling out in the hidden nook as he dug his fingers in harshly.

"Not here...shit…" It was your turn to shift attention, the sensitive space beneath his jaw attacked feverishly with wet smacks and you instinctively started to undo his belt, attempting to free what lay inside. Sliding in, you grabbed at his located erection and let abandonment overcome your being, removing all sense of right and wrong as you heard a moan in response to your tugs on his shaft, teeth nipping at your ear.

"Fuck it." Levi snarled into your lobe, breath hot and rapid as his left hand reached round, digits now working swiftly against the front of your panties with exquisite rolls.

"Ahh…please…stop…"

"You stop, (F/N)."

"I can't…" Approaching footsteps began as a quiet sound but soon became louder, causing you to both part company and smooth clothing down, sort hair and get your gulps of air in check.

"Appears you can."

"Shut up."

"Did you find her, Levi?"

"Yes Erwin. Sulking in the corner." He shot a sly smirk from behind a sheet of black locks and emerged from the darkness, your wrist in his pale hand so he could yank you out also. Placing you between himself and the Commander, Levi tried to reclasp his buckle before it was noticed, covertly pulling leather through metal. You were acutely aware of what was going on behind, a slight glimmer of mischief surfacing as you considered stepping to one side. It was too late, his grip on your shoulders denoting the belt was now secured.

"My office." Erwin strode away and a low voice purred in your ear.

"I'm not done with you yet, (F/N)."

"I should fucking hope not." Following the blonde, you smiled despite the wretched situation that had unfolded outside, leaving a set of silver eyes to watch you leave. And they watched very carefully.

"You too, Levi." Dragging himself out of the spell, the pale man took a deep breath, obeying his superior's command and kept his stare on the back of Erwin's head, thinking of anything but you to allow the excitement to abate. Hange and Mike were already in attendance as you slumped into a chair, glaring at the four of them, previous fury back all too easily.

"Someone had better be giving me a good explanation."

"We will, (F/N)." The one in charge took the lead and everyone sat apart from the man who had just had his hand down your trousers, choosing instead to lean against the wall as always, orbs on you at all times. "Do you know why you're here?"

"Fuck, not this again. No! I don't! Only what that stupid woman told me."

"There's more to it than that."

"No shit."

"I know you're upset…"

"Upset? That's an understatement."

"Please, let me finish? Alright. Someone came to us before you entered the Corps, told me we had to protect you and paid for our services." He had expected some kind of reaction, but when none came he turned to glare at Levi, getting nothing but a small shrug in response. Sighing, he continued. "I'll tell you everything, ok?"

"Ok." Settling back, you listened as the whole story was revealed. A man had approached Erwin a year and a half ago, pleading and promising a hefty reward to take you in, never let you leave and keep you away from main cities. The reason was simple - there were people in high positions who wished harm on you, wanted to harness your powers and use them for evil so in order to prevent you falling into enemy hands, they were told all about the prediction given back in the tavern and how to make you remain inside. At first they were dubious, but in honesty the money was gravely required so a deal was struck and agreements made. No one knew what your supposed secret was, however a hint had been given that it might be released in times of great stress, anger or emotion, hence the menial tasks, provocation and general grinding down of your soul.

"So you wanted to push me to the limit to find out what I could do?"

"Yes. I'm not proud of it, but we had to see if there was anything that could be used to our advantage. We're fighting a war, after all."

"And you're really good at cleaning my underwear, (F/N)."

"Shut up, Mike. Who was it that paid you?" Awkward silence descended and Hange shuffled on her seat, hands wringing with nervous energy. It was the man who stood that answered.

"Your grandfather." And that was when it hit you. The ridiculous tale had just been graced with a punchline so hilarious it was painful. You couldn't control yourself, laughter ringing around the office as you clutched your stomach, doing this instead of crying because in honesty, right now both were options. Speaking between giggles and hitches of breath, you broke their confused stares.

"Oh fuck me, my grandfather? He belongs in a secure facility away from any human contact, trust me. He's crazy! Delusions and visions, conspiracy theories, downright madness…I can't believe he did this! You know when you think of the most insane lunatic possible? That's him."

"So…"

"So Erwin, basically the man who once spoke to a duck for months, fed it at the table and hugged it in bed every night has spun you a massive bunch of bullshit. He has no grasp on reality, never has. One time he thought he was a titan. That was quite fun, actually." No one spoke as you snorted at the memory of your elderly relative stomping round the farm trying to eat people.

"Why would he do this?"

"Hange, I don't know. He probably had a dream or someth…hang on. What about the woman at the tavern?" The final nail was about to be driven into the coffin, Levi once more providing the answer, one which was alluded to last night.

"We were told about that too. It was the only way to make you enlist and believe you had to do everything we fucking said."

"And?"

"She's a kind of hypnotist. Drugged you and planted the images in your head somehow. What you remember as a quick conversation was actually about three hours of mental conditioning." Well, that was fantastic. After all these months and you could have stayed at home. Even then, Levi had been right the other day - in comparison, this wasn't that bad at all, really. Letting out a puff of air, you smiled weakly.

"Sorry guys. Turns out there's absolutely nothing special about me. I've just wasted your time. Mike's underwear aside." Sitting sullenly, you picked at the desk and kept your eyes down, not wanting to see the total disappointment on their expressions.

"At least you can get out there like a normal fucking recruit now."

"What?" Locking onto a grey gaze, you waited for the rest.

"Now we don't have to protect your sorry ass, we can use you to fight." You almost made a snide remark about how he seemed perfectly happy with your backside not that long ago, but kept quiet. Erwin responded.

"How do we know that this story hasn't spread? If we believed it, might those in the interior hold it true also?"

"Oh come on, really? Erwin, you're as mad as my grandad."

"No (F/N), he's right." The other blonde decided to add something sensible to the conversation. "You won't know anything about this, but people have been hanging around, looking for you when we leave the gates. I could smell their intentions and they were not wholesome."

"So we're back to square one?"

"Not entirely." All eyes were on the small man who voiced his next thoughts on the matter. "No harm training still, now there's no chance of you going mental and killing us all."

"Don't be too sure."

"Watch it, (L/N). Anyway, you never know when soldiers will be needed and then the cause overtakes the requirements of the individual." He made sense, keep you ready to go in case a time came that meant everyone had to pick up arms and get going.

"Alright. I'm game. Does that mean I can stop doing all of the shit jobs now?"

"No."

"Yes it does. Levi, we'll just have to go back to how it used to be. Everyone sharing the load." Erwin to the rescue, it seemed.

"Can I come on the expedition?"

"No." That was all four of them answering this time, one with a little more force than truly necessary.

"Why?"

"You're not ready."

"Is anyone ever ready to do that, Levi?"

"Fair point. But still, no. If there are people watching, parading you in front of them is hardly a good idea." That appeared to be the end of it, quiet thoughts being held inside each skull as individuals digested the information.

"Right. Everyone, get some rest before dinner. We can tackle this later." Erwin stood after speaking to signal the meeting was over.

"What should I do now?"

"Rest like I said, (F/N). You don't have to run around doing our bidding anymore." It was going to be strange having free time and you didn't really know what to say. Luckily, or not, Levi recognised the months of ingrained behaviour and gave you a way out.

"I need my boots cleaned."

"Hey! Don't be such an asshole."

"Listen four eyes, if she needs something to waste away the hours on, who am I to deny that?"

"Yes, but…"

"Hange, it's ok. I don't mind. Probably couldn't sit still right now anyway." Rising, you mumbled a farewell and sloped out of the room, recent discoveries weighing heavily upon you. All of this made sense, perfectly plausible yet it still was a bit depressing to think that there was no greater force at work, no final purpose to aid humanity. Fucking drugged. Of course, why didn't you realise? Trudging to Levi's room, you thought about why there was no lock on your door - if you were to have the sudden spark and went into some sort of non-existent trance or whatever, then they would need access. Plain and simple. That didn't apply now, so you would certainly be requesting one.

"Hey (F/N)? You ok? What happened?"

"Oh, hi Brynn. Yea I'm alright. Just a hissy fit, don't worry."

"Sure?"

"Yes. All good. Out of my system now." Stopping to chat, you tried not to feel like you were disobeying orders by dawdling and plastered on a smile. "What's the gossip?" Back in the training unit, that question came up regularly, something was always going on. Your old friend laughed and shook her head, light hair swaying.

"You. That was quite the scene."

"Fuck. Yea, I suppose so."

"That and…" She blushed, hiding behind the dusty blonde locks as a fellow recruit passed by. "Everyone's talking about it."

"About what? Don't get all flaky on me now."

"Ah, just the person!" Petra saved the other woman's embarrassment and bounced over, always so care free. "(F/N), I've got a present for you."

"Huh?"

"Seeing as you're kind of back in business, I wanted to give you this." She pulled a small book from her back pocket, passing it over with a smile. "I heard about the sparring earlier. Don't take Levi too seriously. He comes across so intimidating but he's not really. I suppose you know that, though."

"Eh?"

"Well, you spend a lot of time together so…" The seasoned fighter had her own flush appear, making her seem so much younger and softer.

"So what?"

"Brynn, you know? Right?"

"Know what?" You'd had enough of secrets today, for a whole lifetime in fact and put your hands on hips, glaring at them both.

"I…well…"

"Brynn?"

"The rumour is that you two are…a…kind of…"

"An item." Petra finished the stuttered sentence and shot you a look of amusement.

"Oh fucking hell. All I do is clean his shit up, fix his stupid mistakes on paperwork and try to avoid being tripped over every day. Get your heads screwed on properly." Glossing over the steamy session not that long ago, you took the high ground and turned to the item in your hand. "What's this?"

"Flare signals and formations. It's changed since you last studied, you never know when it could come in useful."

"Wow, thank you!"

"You're welcome." Still regarding you with a playful stare, Petra nodded and gave her goodbyes, leaving the two of you behind.

"I'd better get going. See you at dinner?"

"Sure, (F/N)." Reaching your destination, you found the door to Levi's room locked and groaned. Not again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So yea sorry, you're not a shifter or powerful mage...just blessed with a crazy relative. I kind of wanted to build it up like that and then tear it down to being, well, normal :)


	11. In Due Course

Resorting to the habitual regime, you once more found yourself sitting on the floor and waiting, passing the time by reading the gifted book and learning new things with every page. Lines of red followed by a singular green meant change direction, a manoeuvre you hadn't studied but had heard about from Erwin during one of your late night chats. He was proud of this formation, saving lives rather than endangering them. Perhaps it was best you didn't join the others in a few days; chances of survival on the first expedition were very, very low. Cowardice setting in, you decided staying here wasn't such a bad idea after all.

You committed the information to memory just in case and nodded each time a part was taken in fully. Your mind could hold a vast amount of knowledge without some seeping out the other side, a skill which played a part in your graduation position. It also got rather annoying, vivid recollections coming back uninvited at the most inopportune moments, random thoughts of childhood and now seemingly false ones given to you by that woman. Swiftly moving past that with a mental scowl, you concentrated on the task at hand until you were rudely interrupted.

"In my way again, (L/N)?"

"Stop locking your fucking door then. Oh, and I want a key for mine."

"No way."

"Why not?"

"Because it amuses me."

"Brilliant." Stretching aching joints, you moved your jaw side to side, bruise forming from where this man had punched you earlier. You knew he was aware but would never apologise, didn't have to, it was all part of training. Entry was allowed and you paced in and grabbed the polish and cloths from where you knew they were kept, getting back down on the floor to start your job. Arm in the boot, you brushed dark, sticky gunk over the leather, returning the items to their former glory. "So what else was said after I left?" You knew there must have been more.

"Just a bunch of shit." The voice came from the bedroom, higher ups having more space to their living areas. Yours was just one big room with a separate shower. It suited you fine though, not used to flashy or expensive surroundings.

"Sounds fun. Oh and apparently we're an item." Muffled footsteps padded through, socked feet coming to a halt by your side.

"What?"

"After that little show outside, people have been talking."

"Let them. Load of pricks." Swishing with fervent motions, you removed scuffs and marks expertly, never looking up to see what expression was on the face above. "Dinner's in an hour. Clean yourself up first. I won't be able to focus on my tea if you stink of that shit." He disappeared into the bathroom and you smiled, moving on to the last pair. It was like the clinch hadn't happened at all, life back to normal again. The same thing had occurred after last night's visit, no mention of anything really but it was there, running in an undercurrent through you both.

How this had all come about was still a mystery, feelings awakened in a matter of days that had perhaps been brewing for months, action taken swiftly as soon as the sensation had come to the fore. Levi was obviously not one for hanging around, nor were you. If something seemed right, go for it, no need to dally or avoid the issue. Hearing water, you stashed the footwear carefully and rose, ready to apply some well deserved pay back.

~~~~~~

Stares followed your progress through the hall but you ignored them, making for the corner table and sitting with your hearty meal. The food on offer today was good, previous physical exertion causing a rabid hunger inside. A figure joined you with a grin, own plate heaped full of warm sustenance. Old acquaintances were rekindled by presence, seemingly.

"Any more flagrant lies to spread, Brynn?"

"Oh come on, it's just a bit of fun."

"I know. What else is new?"

"Well, Edward got his head stuck in his horse's bridle somehow. It took three people and a knife to get him out."

"I'm sorry I missed that!"

"It was so funny. And there's a phantom in the grounds. Keeps stealing people's stuff."

"That'll just be Mike." Laughing, the two of you began demolishing your dinner, talking between mouthfuls and catching up on inconsequential things, impending expedition left untouched. No need to darken the mood. A newcomer to proceedings caught your eye and you smirked, brows raised as (e/c) orbs got hold of dull grey ones. Levi looked livid, about to snap and you maintained the innocent facade, watching as he sat down carefully. Trying not to burst into fits of giggles, you observed the man picking through his food and sipping at tea, his disgusted stare on you the whole time. That won't add fuel to the gossip fire, you mused sarcastically and waved with enthusiasm.

Any bad feelings about the path taken to bring you here had gone - for better or worse, this was now your home. Chatting with animation, you made a concerted effort to drag your thoughts from the person who grumbled audibly, knowledge that you now held control over his underwear making your chest spin with tickles of childish enjoyment. Whilst he'd been showering, you took ownership of every pair of boxers he had, hiding them well. It was purely juvenile but ultimately satisfying, a year of grudging subordination let loose in the act of revenge. The trousers you wore were the same as his, rather stiff, itchy and uncomfortable so you could only imagine the way he was feeling right now.

Food was finished and you left your friend with a small hug before hurrying away, full on run materialising as you raced to your room. Pointless really given the lack of security but it made you feel better, stupid sense of safety provided by an accessible door. Unable to remain in one place, you paraded around in circles, then back and forth in lines, nervous energy coming out with bursts of adrenaline. Time marched on and still no repercussions came, rain outside causing clatters of taps on the window. Lighting a lamp, you illuminated the space and sighed. Maybe he would lay in wait, get you back when least expected. Or perhaps there would be no reproach, mind trained on the end of the week. Whichever way, you couldn't rest until you knew.

Before you could stop it, fatigue kicked in and inevitability reared it's head. Peeling off your clothes, you pulled on the flimsy night shirt and shivered, jumping under the covers and burying deep down inside to warm up. If the strike wasn't coming tonight, then when?

~~~~~~

The day of the next trip outside the walls was nearly upon you, one evening underway for all to be together a final time. Levi had been avoiding you, paying no attention when he would pass and acting like you were invisible. It felt much more scary than dealing with an actual event. You'd been busy too, getting things ready, checking the occupants of the stables over, performing maintenance on the gear, providing bolstering words to those who sought you out. It was always the same; immediately before and after the journey saw you in demand.

As was becoming customary, a scant feast was prepared and spirits ran high along with the flow of alcohol, a last supper for some. Upset and uplifted all at once you orbited the hall, speaking to people who looked afraid, joking with the ones who covered up their fear with bravado. The man who hadn't spoken with you since you pilfered his clothing was sitting back in his seat, swigging at ale and keeping a close eye on your actions, selfless assistance dished out as always. Whilst he never asked for such mental aid, the Captain admired it all the same, taking an amount of pleasure from seeing the way you operated. He actually wasn't planning any backlash for your theft having found his underwear yesterday but he knew you'd be expecting it, so let you stew. It had been hard to remain distant, roused desire laying strongly inside but he managed it, years of being a heartless bastard coming in handy.

Erwin beamed, pride emanating from his core at those around him, convinced that tomorrow would signal the first expedition without loss. He could feel it. Mike was off somewhere speaking with some of the team leaders, hearty laughter denoting a comical tale. Hange buzzed around, anticipation of seeing her beloved titans again making her act more manic than usual, currently cornering Dita and chewing his ear off about capturing one alive. A cloud of pretence hung over this all, true emotions shoved down and painted over to enjoy this one potentially penultimate day on earth, played out as if by actors.

Brynn had been one of those afraid few, needing some steady advice and warm words. She'd partly accepted her fate, ready to join her beloved in the skies however also defiant, prepared to slay those who had ripped him from her grasp. Eventually your friend had called it a night, taking herself off to bed to hopefully get some sleep. The liquor certainly helped with that kind of thing. One by one, the members of the Corps retreated to their quarters leaving only a few behind, all of whom seemed steadfast and resolute. Content that your work here was done, you downed the remainder of your drink and stifled a yawn, ready to turn in.

Curling up tightly, you tried to stop shaking from the cold, body convulsing in spasms brought on by the icy atmosphere. If it carried on like this, extra blankets would need to be tracked down. Alerted by the door, you groaned and turned over, waiting for whatever might be coming your way.

"Think you can get away with that?"

"I thought I had, to be honest Levi."

"I'm not a very lenient man, (F/N)."

"I expected nothing less. Come on, get it over with. What's my chore for the night?" Unexpectedly, you were dragged from bed and forced into the main space, bare feet assaulted by freezing floors. Hopping about, you tried to levitate to save your skin from the onslaught when a hand gripped onto your hair, tight but not pulling.

"Out." Pushing you down the corridors, hold still in your locks, Levi marched you to his room, protests constantly spilling from your lips. Finally he let go, only to propel you inside and as happened not so long ago, the lock was engaged to prevent escape. At least he had a fire in here, you thought. Nice and warm.

"Was there any fucking need?"

"Yes." Face unreadable, the man stayed stony and trailed his gaze down, exposed legs on display. "Don't fuck with my stuff."

"Ok, I'm sorry. But let's be real, you did kind of deserve…" He paced forwards, expression now lit by some kind of feral snarl and you backed up, bumping into the desk and holding the wood as you tried to merge into the piece of furniture. "I said sorry Levi, don't hurt…" Cut off by a violent kiss, your words were dismissed as the actions from a couple of days ago were revisited, eager hands seeking out their goals in seconds. Fondling roughly, a small thought popped into your head - he still wasn't wearing underwear. Ignoring the pointless fact, you struggled with his belt and managed to loosen it enough to send the ensnared garment to the floor. Levi began to nibble at your neck, mumbles of satisfaction bubbling out as the large night shirt was ripped open with no regard, already frayed fabric succumbing to the applied force and he stepped out of his trousers.

Strong arms lifted you to the desk, dropped down in sitting position quickly as fingers rid you of the white panties you always wore to bed. They got caught on your left ankle so you flapped to try and shoo them away, all to no avail. "Leave it." Ordered by a growl at your shoulder, you gave a moan of agreement and tugged at the black top in front of you, sweeping it up and over to expose his toned and scarred chest. Straightening, Levi paused to scan the beautiful figure before him, hands on your waist as he stepped closer with a smirk of appreciation, body radiating intense heat as it leant into yours. Lips danced lightly together, two mouths teasing and playing in direct contrast to how impatient you had both just been behaving. Running your palms across the muscular form, he mirrored your touch, squeezes applied in all the right places, breasts treated with gentle reverence.

"Fuck…(F/N)." That one whisper was all it took, a way to ask permission and start what the pair of you wanted, needed, craved.

"Levi…" Again, no more discussion was required, just a single raw groan and the man reached down, grabbing your ass tightly to pull you forwards so you were now precariously perched on the edge of the desk. Legs either side of his body, you kept your bright yet clouded eyes trained onto his equally hazy ones that hung so close, oceans of silvery liquid just begging to be dived into. A shift of grip was made and you felt a push below, not a foreign sensation but one that hadn't been experienced in over a year. In a determined move, Levi entered you slowly, face tilting up with ecstasy as he was fully inside, lids fluttering and teeth gritted. Wrapping your lower limbs around his waist, you gave a sigh of release, the moment arriving that had only been inevitable for such a short space of time however in your minds it seemed like decades.

The man began a solid pace, not brutal but certainly not forgiving either. It was amazing, the incredible motion making your toes curl, every inch of him pounding deeply in with each thrust. "Shit…mmm yea…" His growl was in your ear, fingers twining through (h/c) locks while he dug his other hand into your waist, breath panting at your skin. He couldn't have waited much longer, able to quench the thirst that had been so strong and now he'd tasted you, he wouldn't be letting go. This had been building up for a while, unannounced at first and then recently the burning desire became increasingly required, leading to the current lustful entanglement.

You threw your arms around his neck, face against warm flesh as you applied faint pecks amongst words that flowed without thought. "Yes…Levi yes…fuck…ahhh…" The vocalizations of your pleasure spurred him on, hips slamming against yours in a blur of movement. Snarling, he realised this position was restrictive and gathered you up hastily, the hold from your legs aiding the short journey as feverish kisses were shared. Never breaking the contact below, Levi lowered you to the bed, continuing the powerful gyrations instantly, loving the way you felt, the way you seemed to fit together perfectly.

"Oh fuck…(F/N)…ngh…" Raising up, he leant on the sheets and dropped his head down, hair spilling over his face as open mouths bumped in lazy ghosts of previous actions. Matching the rapid speed, you pushed upwards and saw the sparkle of almost white hues in the eyes above, fire lighting in your abdomen.

"Shit…I'm…yes…Levi…" Unable to form anything correctly, you clung on and opted for babbles and moans as the man started to lose control also.

"That's it, oh yea…fucking hell…" In a barrage of sounds, two bodies quickly gave in to sexual gratification and you yelled his name, threads of immense fulfilment pulling tight then snapping all at once, whole being eclipsed with shudders as the impassioned orgasm washed over you. Incapable of clear thought, Levi called out and gasped, air expelled instantly in a groan of satisfaction, release fierce and delectable. Giving a final few thrusts, the pair of you ceased and kissed ardently, breaths expelled in short bursts from your noses, whimpers of contentment joining the wet laps.

Once calmed, he gazed down at the flushed cheeks and tousled hair on the woman beneath him, vitality embodied in the adorably dishevelled state and he smirked. "That is one hell of a fucking image to take outside the walls with me tomorrow."

"So I'm a goodbye fuck?" You were only teasing, hand stroking his jet black locks out of the way.

"No. I never say goodbye."

"Alright. Until next time then, Levi?"

"Until next time, (F/N)." Leaving you with one last peck, he rolled over and climbed off the bed, fetching a small wash cloth from the bathroom. "Oh. And you'd better see that fucking four eyes in the morning." Ah yes. The perils of becoming too carried away and forgetting any sense of timing.

"Yea, I will. That's going to be awkward."

"Fuck it." Tossing the item your way, he pulled on some softer bottoms and a top whilst you attended to your own clean up, shirt buttoned as it still hung from your shoulders. Sliding into the living area, you retrieved your underwear and basked in the heat from the fire, flames dancing and crackling majestically. It was going to be ridiculously cold in your tiny home. As if able to read your mind, a voice drawled from the adjoining room. "Where are you fucking going?"

"Umm, bed?"

"Perfectly good one here, in case you hadn't noticed." Smiling, you walked back through, getting comfortable under the covers, no questions or affirmations given, just acceptance that you would be spending the night here. Joined by a similarly relaxed human, you felt a nudge and spun to press your back to his stomach, an arm across your waist and a face in your hair. Levi breathed in the scent, humming as he exhaled in an uncharacteristic display of happiness. You didn't pass any comment, didn't attempt to make sense of it all, simply enjoyed the closeness of another person. No, not just another person, the guy who had sprung from nowhere and caused these ferocious emotions within, lit a taper somewhere inside that would undoubtedly smoulder away until the explosives were reached. With that thought in mind, you drifted soundly to sleep.


	12. Return

No light was available to suggest any kind of time of day, sun not yet awoken as you stared blankly at the ceiling, brain getting into gear. Reaching out, you patted the mattress to find an empty space beside you, sheets cool under your palm. Whenever Levi had risen, it had been a while ago. The sound of pops and cracks from wood burning suggested that the fire had been restocked at some point so you decided to make for the heat source, warm your bones ready for another day. Before you pulled yourself out of bed, you allowed a moment to process yesterday. The last couple of weeks, actually.

A lot of information had been absorbed; your true and ultimately stupid reason for being here, the fact you had no special mission, no unique feature to offer. Those who were paid to protect you had been under a false illusion that there was a power to be harnessed and used to fight the righteous war, provoking you into revealing a fictitious ability and keeping you as a servant to eventually break your will but also keep you safe. Even now they knew the sad truth, your superiors still wanted to help, expressed a concern about others who would wish harm on you. It was quite lifting. And then the events of last night had to be mulled over, chewed up until it all made sense.

Of course there had been tension, frustration and need coursing through you both but it was still a relatively bizarre situation to have wound up in. Maybe not bizarre, more like sudden. That kind of thing was only human, granted, however it all seemed to have come out of the blue, struck you down with a blow of emotion. Perhaps it was best not to try and read too much into it, one night of passion to reacquaint yourselves with what it was to be a part of mankind. You would keep an open mind, follow this wherever it was headed and take one day at a time - this world offered little other choice.

Silent steps took you through to the main room and you scanned around for Levi, finding him quickly. He sat upright behind his desk, eyes closed and face calm. Smiling, you moved to the fire and got down in front of it, hands out in an attempt to grab the energy generated by the dangerous flames. They were all-consuming, sways and jumps holding your concentration with hypnotic flashes of colour. It would be so easy to stay here, locked onto the bright, undulating vision, lose yourself completely…

"What the fuck are you doing on the floor?"

"Shit!" Throwing your arms up in a laughable display of fear, you cringed back and spun to see grey slivers staring, man totally unmoved apart from the now open lids. "Oh fuck, I thought you were asleep?"

"I was. You woke me up."

"How the hell do you sleep like that?"

"Habit." That was all to be said on the subject, creak of wood announcing his rise. The man joined you on the floor, just like he had done during your paperwork assault. Orange flickers lit up his blank expression, brows knotted as usual now and a hand landed on your knee. "You'd better go get ready." Something began to spin inside. Ready as in just get dressed, or ready to go on the mission? Had they changed their minds?

"Why?" Holding your breath, you waited with perhaps too much anticipation.

"Tack doesn't just fucking appear on horses." Scowling, you picked up his arm that had been close and threw it to the side in a huff, away from touching you. Levi cocked his head and smirked. "You and I both know that you can't sit still. I'm giving you a purpose, (F/N)."

"Whatever." Absorbing the last minutes of glorious warmth, you stared back into the hearth and sighed. The man next to you sensed this was more than just griping at having to prepare the equine beasts and leant in.

"It's just a short one today. We'll be back to annoy the shit out of you soon."

"Every time, Levi. Every time you all leave, it scares me." It seemed ok to be saying this to the fire, not him. If you'd have locked eyes, you surely would've clammed up, stopped talking and ceased sounding so selfish. All you had to do was stay here and wait, they were risking their lives.

"Like I said, we won't be long." Nodding, you got to your feet, avoiding his glare. "Hey." The now standing male took your chin lightly in his grasp, forcing you to look, softness in the usually fierce orbs. "Until next time, right?" Placing a small kiss on your lips, he let out a long, slow breath in a faint hum, once more enjoying the feeling but telling himself to stay away from this woman until the departure time. It wouldn't do to become distracted. Pulling away, he gave a tiny smile and you grinned despite the inner turmoil which came around on these days, the deathly hold on your heart that was sadly all too normal.

"See you later, Levi." The door was opened quietly and you stepped out, only to find yourself stumbling into the wall opposite with a squeak. Glancing round, you were able to make out the foot that had just tripped you up and the smug face that disappeared back inside. Fucking idiot. Laughing lightly to yourself, you shook your head and trotted off to your room, praying that no one would be around to see the half naked flight.

~~~~~~

As always, you stood by the main entrance as soldiers filed past, smiles given in support to your extended family while they left to put their existence on the line. Erwin had led the pack, words of farewell short and triumphant and now the rest followed, a few hands ruffling your hair like you were a lucky charm. It happened each time from some of those on horseback and you used every fibre in your being to try and imbue an air of success into their touch, be a talisman of sorts. Dita winked and admonished his ride as nips were applied to your locks.

"Oi! None of that, be nice!" Turning his attention to you, he grinned sheepishly and tossed something your way. "Sorry (F/N). Here." Unfolding the cloth, a scarf for your head was revealed.

"Thank you! I'll wear it when you're back, give this one a good rub down, yea?"

"For sure." It was a way of saying goodbye for now, not forever and it was sufficient to end it there. Faces passed by, mumbles and other non-committal farewells given and then Mike came into view.

"Behave yourself, (F/N). Try not to break any doors."

"That wasn't me! I told you…"

"Yea yea. And for what it's worth, he certainly seems in a better mood today. Well, less grumpy than usual anyway."

"What are…?"

"Don't worry. Secret's safe with me." Shooting you a devilish grin, the blonde moved on with a pat to your head and the next person arrived, one who also knew something was going on with you. Mike had obviously used his unnatural talent to come to his conclusions, but this one had a more tangible form of evidence.

"You took that stuff, right? Listen dear, I didn't have time today but I'm getting you later, you hear? No holds barred, full story. Right?"

"Hange, concentrate. I don't want you flying around thinking about my night time activities."

"But…"

"No. Focus. And yes, I took it."

"Good. Ok, here we go sweetie! Mummy's off to find some new play things!" Laughing with a crazy undertone, the bubbly woman sped off and left you smiling. Rows of the active Corps swept through, all given the same gesture of nods or words from the female who always stood to attention at the gate to their headquarters. Two of the last were light haired, friendly faces beaming down but you could feel the fear from one in particular.

"Brynn, you get your ass back here quickly, you hear me?"

"I will (F/N). I'm not ready to be with Leo again just yet." She seemed resolute, more so than before and your chest tightened, her soft voice still powerful.

"He's watching out for you."

"I know. Thank you." Reaching out, you gave her hand a squeeze and nodded to the other soldier.

"I'll make sure she's ok, (F/N)."

"Thanks Petra. Take care of yourself, too." They spurred their horses on, muscular animals complying as your friend cantered away, cloak flapping behind her. Hands on hips, you turned to watch, thoughts cut short by a slap to the back of the head.

"Stop being so fucking sentimental."

"Don't get eaten, you dick."

"Little shit." Smirking, Levi left with a slow nod, one which held meaning much deeper than it would appear to an outsider. Finally they were gone, entrance secured as you and the few remaining members of this branch of the military stood vacantly, those around you being too injured to fight or essential to provide care to the horses that weren't needed today. Short trip. That's all it was. A few hours, maybe they'd be back by dinner? A bleak truth circulated inside of your mind, vivid certainty that when the group did return, it would be a depleted force.

All squad leaders were at the front now as they rode behind the Commander, crowds gathered to shout in encouragement or grumble with distaste. Levi kept his gaze forward, ignoring the excited chatter and the children who fought to get a better view, hating all of the attention. Despite seeming focussed on the task at hand, he had made note of a few things, particular members of the throng whose presence caused concern as a voice sounded from beside him.

"You see them?"

"Yes." Muttering sideways to Mike, the pale man kept his cool, stowing the anger away.

"Look at them. They're searching for (F/N), I know it."

"We can deal with those pricks another time. Won't be hard to find them, those stupid fucking hats are a dead giveaway." Erwin's battle cry could be heard over the black thoughts in his head and the sound of gates clanking open signalled the start of the expedition, one which would hopefully be as mild as possible. Seek, obtain, return. That was it.

~~~~~~

You prowled the building, looking for things to do, keep busy and carry out mindless jobs whilst you waited. That was becoming harder as tasks ran out and time ticked by. It was nearly dark. They'd be back soon, surely. Climbing the stairs, you got to a high vantage point and looked out over the grounds, eyes scanning carefully as you wrung your hands together. It would be ok.

It had all gone to shit. Levi paced the streets, leading his horse behind him as screams of relatives rang in his ears, words spat from all around about how useless the Corps were, waste of money, waste of food. The mission had been a success in that they had obtained the supplies, tins and bottles abandoned in a ravaged village and also a chance discovery; notebook belonging to a fallen soldier from a previous expedition. But with that came a cost - life. Same each single time. The formation had gone well up to a point until someone freaked out, forgot to signal with their flare, the last mistake they'd ever make which led to the ranks being broken and scattered. Narrowed eyes forward, he was acutely aware of the wagons behind that contained not only their loot but the bodies of the fallen and wounded. It was inevitable, members numbering less when they re-entered the city but not as little as last time, thankfully. Still, any death was unacceptable.

In the distance you could see the column approaching, calculating quickly and estimating those still capable of movement. It wasn't as bad as before by the looks of it, however there were certainly missing comrades. Rushing down to the infirmary, you lit oil lamps and readied the items needed, assisting the medical staff who you had roused from the mess hall with a shout. Waiting impatiently, you hopped from foot to foot, nervously anticipating the impending influx of patients. Who would need help? Who had been beyond it? Questions spinning, the sudden smash of a door hitting the wall banished them to the background, all attention on those in grave conditions.

Activity was all around and you estimated that about fifty souls required some kind of patching up, taking the lesser injured to work on, things like small cuts that might become infected if left unchecked, superficial gashes and gouges. The more serious cases were dealt with by the experts, broken bones, missing limbs, practical disembowelment. None of the gore bothered you, chunks of flesh and blood soaked cloths everywhere in sight but it couldn't affect how you behaved, not now. Perhaps later you'd take a moment to process all of this, catalogue and store the visions away in the hope that they wouldn't resurface in your sometimes overly-clear brain.

Tending to a red stained man, you carefully washed away the crusted liquid, face mangled in puffed cuts and scrapes. As you cleaned him up, you realised underneath it all was Edward, the guy who had become tangled in his steed's gear recently, a moment of frivolity now probably just a distant memory. He looked awful, nothing like he should and you delicately stitched at his brow, gentle tugs given to hold his skin together. None of your superiors had entered, which meant they were either fine or past help. You hoped it was the former and got on with your work, also noting that Brynn hadn't been in either.

Two hours later and the walking wounded had been seen to; some of those sporting worse trauma hadn't made it, bodies wrapped to be added to the macabre pile outside. Passing a few words to the doctors, you told them they'd done a good job, magic hands giving back the capability to see another sunrise. Their sombre expressions matched the mood and you left them alone - emotions could be discussed at a less raw time. Making for the courtyard, you sighed and steadied yourself for what would be a mass cremation, numbers unknown.

Stars twinkled high in the sky, pin pricks of hope in an otherwise black outlook. The way they looked down upon you all was soothing, telling of other life in the universe, maybe. Theories had been given on that by people now dead or imprisoned for madness, crazy ideas stamped out and prevented from eventual circulation but you recalled reading one man's writings when the leaflet was still available. His suppositions gave a kind of comfort at a time like this - whether you were struggling here, others may not be; peace was possible.

A cart was currently being unloaded and you went to aid the heavy lifting, cocoons of fabric containing people you had spoken with only this morning. Existence was fleeting. That singular truth rode strongly in your mind while the packages of those now passed were laid with care and respect. Pyre complete, you stood back and finally set eyes on those closest to your heart, four individuals who kept you safe, three others who you enjoyed the company of. Brynn looked shell shocked, eyes brimming with tears as she shook uncontrollably in Petra's arms, Dita a few paces away on his own, bandana twisted in fraught hands.

Hange looked exhausted but steady, a slight glow to her eyes that told you a discovery had been made. Mike was flanked by his decimated squad members, now only two remaining as the trio stared at the stack of white shrouds. You spotted the men under Levi's command, standing together in silence behind their leader. The Captain was unreadable as always, dark clothing in favour of the restrictive uniform, one which may have been damaged or torn, soaked with blood. Erwin cleared his throat and held up one of the flaming torches, voice strong and intended to spread defiance.

"Forty three souls. That's our sacrifice today. But what we can learn from the documents retrieved could spell the start of humanity's strike. Without putting ourselves on the line, we gain nothing. These comrades have not died in vain. We will prevail." A few mumbles of half-hearted agreement whispered around, along with bottles passed throughout. One was placed in your hand and you glanced down at the hard liquor, presumably part of the haul from the village as they had not been in storage yesterday. Sipping in quiet reflection, you gave your own wordless sentences of remembrance as the fire was lit, orange hues a far cry from the enjoyable flickers you'd watched before sunrise. It could be as cruel as it was beautiful, destructive substance engulfing the deceased.

Tonight would be a time to stay alone, gather thoughts and more than likely drink steadily in a complete opposite to the feast that preceded the expedition, everyone locked away to process what had happened. They were all used to it, no new recruits, no novices, yet it never failed to hit hard. Tomorrow you would begin your rounds, offer verbal support to anyone who wanted it. It was too soon now. As one collective, the remaining members of the Corps grieved, smoke rising up in spirals to join the midnight cosmos as the last reminders of any corporeal existence was eaten up by the flames.


	13. Treatment

Sleep wasn't an option so you found yourself standing by the window, gazing up into those stars and dreaming of reaching out to touch them, gather the spots up and bottle their light as a form of hope. The reality was much less poetic, harsh alcohol at your lips as the receptacle filled with something completely opposite was tipped. Celestial objects would give warming comfort in a wholly different way, brightness allowing the strength to go on another day and leave any thoughts of death behind. This wouldn't be the last time, of that you were sure and it most definitely wouldn't get better. Tonight was your chance to get over the events and turn to those who had witnessed them, lived through the horrors once more.

A shuffle behind made you jump, tired eyes meeting equally fatigued ones as Levi stepped in, papers and his own drink in hand. You didn't even register the fact that he locked your door behind him, key stashed in his pocket - the dark lids bothered you more. He had come here without hesitation once official business was completed, strong realisation gripping his heart. Yesterday had awoken an as yet undiscovered need to be in company, namely your company and now was certainly a time to sit in the presence of a woman he had been glad to return home to. Sitting heavily on your bed, he let out a small sigh and threw the documents to the side. They could wait. You joined the fragile looking man and spoke softly.

"Did you get injured?"

"Not really."

"Let me see."

"It's nothing."

"Levi, don't be a fucking martyr." Huffing, he held his left arm up and let you roll the sleeve, stare trained at the floor. "That needs cleaning." A small yet angry looking cut stood out on the porcelain skin, one which would probably be ok with a light bathing now, medicine to follow in the morning. Gathering the supplies kept in your cupboard, you tended to the wound, basic items stashed here in case of…well, you didn't really know. You just wanted them on hand for any eventuality, like an artist would carry a pencil and pad at all times. "What happened?"

"Debris." You nodded, presuming flying pieces of rubble had been sent his way by a titan crashing through already crumbling edifices, wood and stone shattered and dispersed into the crowds. Finishing the quick job, you dropped the fabric down after applying a bandage and remained still.

"Talk to me." Levi didn't move, glaring into space so you treated him to his own kind of behaviour, holding his chin gently to ensure his eyes were on yours. His standard response was lined up and ready to go.

"Just because I fucked you, doesn't give you the right to interrogate me, (F/N)." Ignoring the offensive summary of the newfound relationship, you shook your head.

"Levi, I'm not doing this because I think I have a right. I'm not doing this because of anything that may or may not be between us. I'm doing this because you need it." He swiped your hand away with a tut, no power behind the gesture.

"I don't fucking need it. I've dealt with loss many times in the past, on my own and before you even dragged yourself here."

"And you're the pinnacle of a well-rounded individual, aren't you?" Sighing at the unneeded outburst, you lowered your tone and spoke again. "Showing pain doesn't make you weak, it doesn't paint you as any less of a man. It reminds us what it is to be human."

"I'm forgetting every day what that feels like." His words were so quiet that they nearly went unheard, sad admission of a fraught mind causing your heart to drop into a clenched grip of sorrow.

"And that's why you need to release it. You keep holding on to all of this, you'll snap, Levi." Grey, dull orbs remained on your (e/c) ones that were full of hurt, mirroring those that broke contact to return to the floorboards. Giving him time, you simply sat there, hand taking his empty one tightly and voice speaking quietly. "Say them out loud." Levi took a swig at the bottle and grit his teeth, jaw clamping down. He nodded once and began to talk, slow monotonous sound dragged from his mouth as he recounted every single full name of those lost today, forty three dead remembered in utterances that would never be used again. Last of the fallen voiced, you both held the bottles up and drank.

"Someone fucked up. Got scared and didn't use their flare. Whole left flank was broken through. We were on our way back, almost out of the town when it happened." Squeezing your grip, you indicated he should continue. "Not one person died up until that point. That huge bastard's formation finally worked." He paused, a look of guilt crossing his features.

"You can't plan for accidents, Levi."

"I should have been quicker. Noticed the abnormal sooner. I could've saved…"

"No. Out there is uncertain. Lines on paper are all very well and good inside this building but once you're faced with unpredictable enemies, anything goes. This is the lowest mortality rate since I've been here. Focus on that."

"It could have been fucking zero, (F/N)."

"One day it will be." Silence descended and he raised his head, eyes circled with remorse. "You need to sleep. Come on." Taking the documents he had brought for some reason, you placed them on the desk along with the bottles and extinguished the candle, moon allowing a tiny amount of light. Shoes off, the two of you crawled into the bed fully clothed. Levi made no protest at your order, his failing barrier against feelings stretched so thin that if he didn't rest, it would likely end in some sort of breakdown. You'd done this, allowed him to mourn outwardly for the first time in nearly five years and he was unsure what he thought of that fact. It may have been a small show of grief compared to that last intense event, however it seemed more effective. Holding you tightly to his body, he began to unwind and gave in to slumber.

~~~~~~

Eyes flickered open and came to rest on already open ones, steely semi-circles that stared out from under low lids. "Morning." It was light, way past breakfast if your calculations were correct and you smiled slightly before answering.

"Morning. Did you get any sleep?"

"Shit loads, actually (F/N)."

"Good. You don't look so fucked."

"Thanks." Shuffling sideways, he leant in and placed a singular kiss on your lips.

"What was that for?"

"I'm not allowed now?"

"No, you are." Pondering how soon this next question might be, you decided it was ok. Levi certainly seemed lighter. "How are you? Really?" He mulled it over, assessing his thoughts and considering the honest answer.

"I'm alright."

"Yea?"

"Yea. I think I've figured you out, (F/N)."

"Huh?"

"You're some kind of witch."

"Hey!"

"How else would you be able to do that fucking shit to me?"

"It's called being a good listener, Levi. And knowing what people need to do to let go of their demons." He nodded, agreeing that your description was much more accurate. "And on that subject, I have a lot of soldiers to see today."

"What about my paperwork?"

"I'll help later." He held you in place with a glare, only half real, knowing how your skills would be required by so many people. "Promise."

"Dangerous ground there, (L/N)."

"I will. And you can do something for me too."

"Oh really?"

"Yup. You can give me that fucking key, Captain." Clarity had broken through and you recalled what happened last night. Levi smirked and prodded you in the forehead with a finger.

"I don't fucking think so. It stays with me at all times."

"Why? In case I go crazy and you have to lock me in?"

"Something like that." Weight now lifted from his previously cold heart, mischief and lust took over as his mouth captured yours again. Speaking in amongst the pecks, you mumbled with little force.

"Shit Levi…I'm going to…have to…see Hange again…"

"You only got one?"

"I didn't want to presume."

"Tch. Go and get a whole fucking crate."

~~~~~~

Any of the elation from an hour ago had been removed as you did your rounds, visiting those holed up in their rooms, circulating the hall where most were gathered despite any meal time not being due. It was a way to keep together, have company in the dark days that always followed loss. Before the end of the week, life would return to normal but this was tentative ground. Currently you sat with your rediscovered friend, a woman who until recently had been busy training while you were occupied with chores.

"I can't stop seeing them, (F/N). Hearing those screams."

"I know, Brynn. I guess it doesn't get any easier but it can be turned around."

"How do you mean?" The pair of you sipped at warm tea, preparations underway in the kitchens for dinner in a couple of hours, clunks and clatters sounding out.

"I heard the notes Hange found are really interesting. Titans speaking. Can you imagine?"

"Oh wow, really?"

"Yes, so I suppose Erwin's right. Their deaths weren't in vain."

"Yea." Sitting taller, the light haired female nodded. "We'll get those bastards one day."

"You bet." Squeezing her hand, you smiled into Brynn's eased expression. Not everyone was so pliable, unfortunately. Deep sorrow could be difficult to alleviate for some of those you'd spoken with, especially the closer comrades of the fallen. They'd be ok in time, you assured yourself. After a while the next port of call was required, an all too awkward one and you sloped down the halls towards the small lab that you spent so many hours in, arranging glass jars and tidying samples. For the second instance in two days, you were back for the same thing.

"(F/N)! How is it out there?"

"Better than last time, Hange."

"We did so well. All those supplies and this book? Oh my word, it's amazing."

"So I've been told. You think you'll get anything useful?" Of all those returning, she always seemed steady, focussing on the job, goodbyes having been given during the cremation.

"I'm sure of it."

"And you? You're ok?" Glasses loomed close at your query, a smile on her lips.

"Of course. But you're not."

"What?"

"You're eyeing up my medicine cabinet (F/N). You dirty girl." Winking, she forcibly sat you on a chair and giggled, rummaging through the small vials. "If this is going to be a daily occurrence, I'll give you something else too. Not that I don't enjoy your visits, but I really have no desire to know what you've been up to."

"Yes you do."

"Ok. I do. Right, take this…"

"Every day, I know."

"Oh? Training for three years with frisky cadets…ah, I remember that…" Clouding over, she shook the memory away and delivered the items. "So. Tell me everything."

"Hange! No."

"Aw c'mon! Just a little something?"

"No."

"Fine. I suppose I'll just have to find out on my own."

"Good luck." You spoke on other matters a little longer, impending debrief pulling the older woman away finally. You'd done all there was to today, advice given and gentle reminders that you were always around if anyone wanted to talk, so a decision was made to see if those in the kitchen needed help.

~~~~~~

Dinner was over, a few people remaining to chat as you cleared up the tables, plates taken back and forth before the scrubbing could begin. Erwin stood to one side with two of his subordinates, discussion too low for you to pick up any details.

"We all saw them."

"I know, Levi. What do you want me to do?"

"Do? Find out what the fuck they're up to."

"Mike, are you sure they're watching for (F/N)?"

"Positive."

"Ok." Glancing over to the subject of conversation, the Commander let the beginnings of a plan form vocally. "Let's lure them in."

"Lure them…what? Are you fucking serious?"

"Deadly, Levi. Until we know what they want, we have no counter attack, no way of stopping them." He hadn't worked out the logistics, but to bait the men dressed in long black coats would be the best way to discover their true intentions.

"This isn't some kind of shitty little group of thieves, Erwin. They look like they're organised and armed to the fucking teeth."

"All the more reason to gain the upper hand."

"At what expense?"

"What price a life, you mean? Really, you need to stop concerning yourself with trivial matters."

"Trivial?!" Those left all stopped and turned at Levi's exclamation, large eyebrows raised to the Captain as a whispered reply was given.

"Those people we lost yesterday were expendable. As am I, as are you, as are all members of the Corps."

"Well if that's the case, why bother? Hmm? If someone's after (F/N), who has no special fucking mission by the way, why go to the trouble of seeking these guys out? If she's as expendable as the rest of us, just let her fulfil her duty, send her outside the walls and come what may." He meant none of it, spoke only to play devil's advocate and expose the flagrant hypocrisy. And as always, his boss had an answer.

"Don't lose yourself in the finer details. An enemy of one of our numbers is an enemy to all. This could be part of something far bigger than we could imagine." 

"Fuck me. You and your theories. Ok, so what? Shall we stick her out on the street and let them take her?"

"Why so bothered, Levi? Afraid you might need to do your own reports? And don't deny it, I know her handwriting."

"Fine. Do what you want. Just don't expect me to fucking like it." Storming off, the pale man grumbled and shoved the doors open violently, snapping at a passing soldier for nothing in particular. You watched the whole heated exchange, just that one shout the only thing intelligible but the way Mike looked at you was troublesome. Washing down the last table, the bucket was stowed and you rushed off in the direction of the blonde, originally selfish in nature however it was now for something else. Tracking him down outside his room, you noted that the door was now fixed. Gasping for breath, you leant hands on your knees and struggled to catch in air.

"Running the halls after men, (F/N)?"

"Shu…shut up…"

"You're really out of shape."

"I said shut up. How are you?"

"I'm fine…why?"

"You lost half your squad, Mike." He shrugged and sniffed once in retort, facial hair twitching.

"It happens. That's the risk."

"Oh give it a rest. You sound like Erwin."

"And you smell like Levi."

"This isn't an insult match. Cut the crap." He sighed and rubbed his face, tiredness spilling out from his pores.

"They crumbled under pressure, (F/N). I didn't train them well enough."

"Yes you did. Even the strongest can falter. What you did was make the best of a shitty situation. If it wasn't for you, more would have died. And before you say anything, I know you took out three titans on your own." The guy was good, second only to the Captain and he nodded.

"I suppose."

"No supposing. It's the truth. So be proud and go think up some stupid prank. Just not at my expense."

"But it's so fun to pick on you, (F/N)."

"Maybe, but I know your strategies. I'll be waiting for it." Leaving him with a laugh, you saw his stance change slightly and smiled to yourself. Humour was a good way to lighten the load of a joker. Now was the matter of a grumpy man with paperwork to do. A short distance away and you reached the next place on your mental list, body exhausted by the long day. Knocking softly, a growl allowed entry and you slipped in, brain spent and muscles aching. None of the physical work you'd done today had been asked of you, all taken on as part of a routine and the desire to be useful, especially in times of stress. Levi didn't look up, just glared down at the still blank forms on his desk. He hadn't been able to concentrate.

"Want me to go and get some tea?"

"No. In there." He pointed to the cabinet door to his side, the place where he had stashed the luxuries obtained in town not that long ago, a trip which seemed like years in the past. Crouching down, you unearthed a bottle with no label and held it up, dark liquid seeming so colourful and deep in the fire light. 

"What is it?"

"Wine, (F/N)."

"Oh shit, I haven't had any for fucking ages."

"Me neither. I was saving it for some stupid reason."

"Don't open it on my account, Levi."

"What better occasion than when you want to commit murder?"

"Erm…what?"

"Oh nothing. Sit." Pushing the papers to one side, he searched a drawer for a small screw of metal and pulled out two mugs. "This will have to fucking do." The pop of cork joined the sound of flames, joined soon by cups being filled. Levi picked up the drink and you followed suit, holding the ceramic items up. "To Erwin and his fucking stupid ideas." Taking a long gulp, the man nodded in appreciation and sat back.

"What's he up to now?"

"You don't want to know. Actually, you'll find out soon enough. It'll piss him off if I tell you, though." With a faint smirk at that thought, he let you in on the prior conversation, observing the growing frown on your face. He couldn't tell if it was distaste or intrigue.

"Could it work?" Intrigue it was.

"Maybe." He didn't want to think about it anymore so pointed down. "Pen's there, (F/N)."


	14. Strategy

Two weeks had passed and as predicted, things returned to normal. Scuffles broke out between members of the Corps over random things like lost socks, wrong looks, misplaced affection. It was like being back in training again, passions running high along with hormones as everyone seemed to be trying to get hold of one another. This all meant that you and your growing friendship with Brynn had plenty of gossip to discuss, regularly catching up in your corner of the hall to talk about the goings on in the headquarters. Her love life was still firmly based on a ghost, feelings strong for the departed Leo as it would be for some time, you imagined. Despite Hange's best efforts and Mike's threats, your own romantic ties remained undiscovered.

Daily life for you now consisted of the same exercises as the others, joining in sparring and gear practice but you maintained the hard working side, often to be found cleaning something or helping out where needed. It was habitual and also a part you weren't ready to say farewell to, assistance much appreciated and you found it to be a kind of trade off for not being a part of the expeditions. A lot of your spare moments were spent doing Levi's much hated office tasks, enjoying the time together. If he wasn't carrying out official business or generally being a Captain, he was with you, usually in his quarters. It was warmer in there, larger and also no questions would be asked about the locked door.

Your relationship had moved fast, as was required in this existence, physical and emotional bonds bolstered with every passing hour, appreciating the chance to spend quiet moments in one another's presence. Plans for your ruse to smoke out the potential enemy had manifested into a concrete idea, mechanisms underway to carry out phase one during the next trip outside the walls. You'd been assured it was wholly safe, as safe as could be anyway, but Levi still held his reservations. For him, this was an unnecessary risk that could possibly take away the woman he seemed to require now, your aura alone allowing him to sleep, actually properly sleep for once in his often wretched life. Also, seeing the way in which you had almost single handedly picked up the whole Corps after the last mission was a massive factor - that kind of person was needed by many more than him.

It was as if you'd broken down his barriers but in a form that allowed fortification rather than just eliciting naked sorrow and leaving it exposed and untended. The chanted names of the fallen did something inside, allowed fragility to surface however with the knowledge that a sturdy support was there at all times. With you, he felt safe. In almost over a fortnight it would all be happening again, journey made which had different repercussions this time. Erwin was convinced that his scheme was watertight, flawless plot to expose enemies yet Levi had yet to be fully encompassed by his superior's dream.

Glancing up, he studied the small scowl on your features, the little frown which had become so endearing over the intense time spent in each other's company. It signalled concentration and he swirled his tea, watching closely to ensure he would never forget these tiny things about you, burning them to memory. He hoped to never need the stored visions, always have the ability to see them first hand but he was a realist; shit happened, especially in this type of job. You looked over, aware of eyes on you and smiled.

"What?"

"Nothing. Get on with it. Erwin needs that report tonight."

"Shouldn't have sat on it for days, then."

"I was waiting."

"What for?"

"To piss him off, (F/N)."

"You're worse than Mike sometimes, you know that?"

"Please. He has nothing on my evil fucking mind."

"Evil?" You smirked and placed your elbow on the desk. "That's not evil. It's just annoying."

"If he doesn't have that today, he's going to get his balls ripped off. So yes, evil." Holding the flashing stare, you shook your head. About to make some kind of comment, your open mouth was halted by a loud knocking at the door. "And here's the man himself." Standing slowly, Levi stretched and took his time, walking sedately to let the visitor in.

"Have you got that…oh, hello (F/N). I should have guessed. All finished with the report?"

"She's too fucking slow."

"No, Levi. You're too lazy."

"What can I say? She's got a gift." Snorting laughter, you shrugged and held up the pen.

"At least you can read my writing, Erwin."

"Actually, I'm glad you're both here. As usual." Ignoring the accusatory tone, you retained the sweet smile and stifled a laugh as the official occupant of the room closed the entrance, rolling his eyes. "We're going to use a decoy."

"What? Who?" The Commander paused, almost unwilling to continue.

"Brynn."

"No."

"(F/N)…" You stood, tea spilling slightly and a vague mental note was made to clean it up later.

"I said no. I'm not endangering someone else because of me." Pointing vehemently, you kept the blonde pinned down with your glare, mostly unaffected by the who but the why, although using your friend made it much worse.

"Listen to what I have to say?"

"Erwin, I know you want to get to the bottom of this and if it means I can join you to fight, then good." Pacing, you sighed and stood by the fire. "I'm grateful for your protection, I really am. But please, no needless deaths?"

"No loss is needless, (F/N)."

"It can be. Brynn's an excellent soldier, let her do what she does best."

"She will. Just listen." The large man waited for you to turn, hand outstretched towards the chair you had recently vacated. Shooting a glance to Levi, you saw him nod in an almost non-existent bob of the head; he knew this guy better than anyone and you trusted his judgement. Complying, you sat down heavily and were joined on the other side of the desk once more, Erwin taking up residence on the leather couch, huge tree trunk legs crossed. He explained how your friend would be wearing her hood and surrounded by the cream of the crop in a show of keeping her safe. Your name would be used as often as possible without being blatant but she wouldn't speak, keep her head down and just nod. Meanwhile, you were to be on the outskirts, covered well and joined by Mike to watch those who would be following the procession.

"But Mike's one of the best? Won't they notice he's not present?"

"He's going into town soon wearing a sling and bandages, make it look like he's too injured to participate."

"How do you know they'll be there?"

"They're always there." That alone was enough to cause chills in your bones. Whoever was observing you did so around the clock, it seemed. Physically displaying that shiver, you hugged yourself tight and flinched despite the warmth in the room. Levi did everything he could to remain still, preventing himself from adding his own body heat to your distressed form. He wasn't often outwardly compassionate, choosing to save that kind of treatment for the moments before sleep took hold but the way you had trembled lightly was agony. Verbal shelter would have to do.

"Erwin, don't be so fucking melodramatic." The warning in his voice was clear and blue eyes shifted to question half-lidded ones. "Isn't it bad enough to be in this position? We don't need you trying to scare the shit out of (F/N)."

"I'm not. I'm being honest. If that's harsh, then so be it." No one spoke and you looked between the battling stares, waiting for a break in the tension. None came so you took matters into your own hands.

"Alright. So what do Mike and I need to do?" Attention was back on track and you let out a shaky breath.

"Observe. Once they have Brynn, you track them."

"Wait, what?" Back on your feet, you marched over and held the Commander in place with furious orbs. "You're going to let them take her?!"

"We have to, (F/N)."

"Stop, hold on." Levi was by your side, two angry figures before the man in charge. "None of this makes sense. If (F/N) is supposed to be hidden, how is she supposed to fucking track anyone without being discovered? And surely as soon as they see Brynn's face, they'll realise? Probably kill her?"

"Levi..."

"I'm not done." The low growl was menacing, demanding to continue. Erwin stayed passive and allowed the griping. "And once they kill Brynn, all the shits have to do is turn round and see (F/N) coming for them. We'll have handed her over on a silver platter." Crackling flames were the only sound, three people unmoving and you saw the look on the blonde's face - it was still part of the plan.

"Oh no. No no no. I know that expression, Erwin. What's going on?"

"(F/N), I won't let anyone harm you or Brynn."

"How?!" The big man sighed and placed a hand on the sofa next to him, patting and inviting you to join. The person to your left had crept closer and you shook your head. "I'm good here, thanks."

"Fine." He started to go through the rest of the proposal, stating the points in a monotone fashion as if he were simply talking through what he'd had to eat that day. It wouldn't just be you and Mike. Whilst the two of you were the spearhead of sorts, others would be close behind, far enough to be inconspicuous but near all the same so they could follow in your wake. Brynn would have her face covered like yours and this all hinged on one factor - speed. "It's all going to happen so fast that we will rely on their haste and use it to our advantage."

"How."

"They won't have time to do much but grab their target and we'll catch up before they uncover her identity. If we all go racing after them, it might force their hand so we make it appear as if they've gotten away. That's why you and Mike are instrumental, a middle man between the abductors and the rest of us. A trail of bread crumbs, if you will." That made more sense, however it was still all too dependant on external factors.

"What if it doesn't work?"

"It will." He was always so sure of himself, you thought. Self righteous and goddamn annoying. Levi tutted.

"So who is actually going outside the walls? Soldiers with no leaders?"

"No, Levi. No one will."

"It's all for show?"

"Yes." Not only staging a fake kidnap, but a false expedition too? That could be very costly. "I'm aware of what those in the interior may say but we have a threat to deal with. I'll take full responsibility and counter any backlash we might suffer."

"Damn fucking straight you will, old man."

"Thank you for that, Captain. Now, I'll let you get back to work. Think it over and we'll speak again soon." Erwin rose and stretched his muscles, imposing form appearing larger than ever. "I don't have to tell you this is need to know basis."

"Whatever. Now get the fuck out of my room."

"Good night to you too. Sleep well. And get that report to me first thing." He exited and left the pair of you alone, minds spinning with how horrifically wrong this could all go. Levi shook his head and flopped to the sofa, eyes piercing through the air which was suddenly thicker.

"He's fucking crazy."

"Yep." Joining him, you put a hand on his thigh and squeezed lightly. "He seems to have thought of everything, though."

"That giant only thinks about himself, (F/N)."

"He doesn't have to do this. It's all because of me." Silver wells were flashing as they shot into your (e/c) hues and he sighed.

"That's not true. He was right about one thing. This is most likely a group that will cause trouble for us regardless. Taking them down early might be for the best."

"So you agree with him now?"

"Sadly, yes. That fuck is too clever for his own good." Smiling, you nodded and took in a deep gulp of air. Whatever may happen, it was going down in two weeks, fourteen days standing between you and potential death. "Don't worry. We'll be right behind."

"Ok, Levi." A hand took yours in a tight grip, fingers laced and he raised his arm, kissing your knuckles gently.

"We can do this."


	15. Covert Operation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nearly done updating the old chapters, sorry for the onslaught of posts!

Never had time flashed by so quickly than the past fortnight, days feeling like hours until the moment was almost here. The finer details had been hashed out, a few others brought into the mix - not only the Commander and his four squad leaders, but those under Levi's rule also, the best of the best. Those new to the plan had been advised of the mechanics yet not the full story, only told what was expected of them come the time. No one questioned Erwin's authority, no demands were made for further information, they just agreed. That's how it was in the Corps. Brynn was afraid, understandably, however the details included a huge force to support her so she had agreed, stature similar to yours, the one she would be imitating without knowing why.

Mike's part of the ruse had been executed, limping form having been on a few journeys to the town for what appeared to be a sedate shopping trip, taking advantage of the fake lack of active service. His observations had been brought back along with some items he'd purchased, keeping up the pretence with satisfactory results - gifts, to be precise. The recon missions had discovered that there were always six dark characters waiting near the headquarters, the same ones every day. Come the time, that could change so everyone worked on the supposition that there would be more.

The rest of the Corps thought they were heading out to face the titans one more time, standard feast having taken place last night and you did your best to provide luck and good wishes to those gathered, knowing it was wholly false. Glances from the small group in on the plot had been given, serious stares shared between you all. Your usual place by the gates was not occupied today, already in hiding and covered almost head to toe with disguising clothes, face wrapped up behind a scarf and long cloak enclosing your gear. The blonde by your side on the roof had lost the bandages, similarly dark garments covertly keeping his identity unknown and you stared down, waiting for the sound of hooves, heart trying to escape your body. Again, half a dozen shadowy figures hung around, anticipating the arrival of the troops.

Clutching at your shaking hands, you tried to keep the nerves at bay and failed miserably. Up until this point, Levi had calmed your fears, provided encouragement and blatantly called you out on it when you panicked unnecessarily. To the outside world, it would have seemed like there was nothing different between you, constant squabbles and orders, the odd shove or kick, keeping up the facade as you had done for a month and a half. It wasn't due to shame that you kept your relationship hidden, just a sense of privacy. Distant rolls of wooden wheels could be heard and your chest tightened, cold sweat springing upon you uninvited. It would be a while before they came into view so in an attempt to steady frayed thoughts, you cast your mind back to last night, the gentle display of affection being unusual, different to the normally fast and passionate sex the pair of you enjoyed. The intimacy wasn't a way of saying goodbye, merely solidifying your growing feelings and sending a clear message - it was only until the next time you met.

"Hey."

"What?"

"Breathe, (F/N)."

"Shit. Sorry Mike. I'm just really fucking nervous."

"Good. If you weren't, I'd worry."

"Weirdo." Nudging the often playful man by your side, you smiled. He was an expert at alleviating tension.

"Anyway. When are you going to admit that you're fucking the Captain?"

"Mike!" Hissing quietly, you pulled the scarf further up so all he could see was your glare, one which started off filled with fury but soon softened and he regretted his terminology.

"Ah, I see. Sorry."

"What for?"

"I thought it was all just a bit of fun."

"Who says it isn't?"

"Your eyes, (F/N)." Flustered, you looked away and made out the start of the column of soldiers, human line containing brave souls who wouldn't actually be going into normal enemy territory today.

"Shut up, Mike. Concentrate." He laughed lightly and patted your head through the hood, usual good luck charm still employed for him at least. Crowds milled about and began to chatter excitedly as the Corps arrived, but your attention was firmly on those you were here to deceive, black coats moving into the throng to get closer. You could faintly hear the sound of your name and flicked over to check on Brynn, the woman circled by those chosen for this mission. Hange was doing a good job at drawing looks towards the protective formation, voice shrill as always and you huffed with amusement.

The enemy closed in, nodding to one another as they supposed you were in there, all approaching from different angles to ensnare the prey. If this had been real, it would likely have ended in a blood bath but for the purposes of today, the temporary guards had been advised to stand down, act shocked and let you/Brynn be taken. From your vantage point, it was like watching animals sneak up on wounded prey, wolves pressing in to make a strike. Gripping tight to your handles, you felt Mike tense and sent thoughts below to those involved, wishing there was a way to communicate with them.

Levi knew they were coming, that shitty glasses was making far too much noise and he suppressed the need look up to where you lay in wait, wanting to see the eyes he had stared into yesterday, those captivating irises that shone so brightly during what had been the closest he'd ever felt to another person. But he couldn't, wasn't able to catch a glimpse in case the game was discovered so he clenched his teeth and let the inevitable happen. Bodies got near, ones which he could easily strike down but that was no good, it had to be done properly, see if their base could be found. Snarling, Levi muttered to the female in the centre. "It's coming. Be ready." A nod was given and he sighed. Passive behaviour was not his strong point.

"Hey?! What…?!" Oluo gave a bit of a dramatic attempt at shock, acting skills needing work and earning him a small tut. Erwin made a show of reaching for his blade and the pale man carefully took note of the way the abductors moved, their fluid motions and swift action. Not being able to react was indescribably painful, making them all look like imbeciles who couldn't even defend their own. Two of the attackers grabbed out, target acquired with more cries of forced disbelief, true ones ringing out from those not in on the scheme, yells at their superiors to do something, stop this. Dita's part was brought into play, voice cutting above the furore as the small group readied themselves, stolen member disappearing quickly into the streets.

"Everybody cease! Back to headquarters! The expedition is cancelled!" Gasps from civilians accompanied incredulous whispers - nothing like this had ever been seen before.

"But Sir…"

"No buts! Get back, now!" In the confusion, seven figures were able to dismount and leave their horses with the now commanding squad leader, beasts passed to the back to look like extras for the aborted mission. Nods exchanged, Levi was eventually allowed an upwards glance, faint hint of a wave given from the roof as he pushed his thoughts your way. Be safe, (F/N). Keep out of trouble.

The six members of the enemy fled the scene, eyes from above on them at all times. Moving with silent speed, you and Mike travelled across tiles, jumping over gaps and keeping track deftly. You managed to make out ties around Brynn's wrists as she was carried over one of their shoulders, ropes that must've been applied instantly on capture. She kept quiet, struggling without sound to keep her true identity hidden. Good. So far it was working. Once round the corner, you knew there were a variety of routes they could take and were also aware that those behind would be following now, distance maintained as agreed. A slight sideways stare allowed you to see flashes of green as the rear guard lifted into the air to join you at this height, extra bodies for the fight.

A glimmer of metal on the street sent the plans crashing down and you hissed to the man by your side. "They've got gear!" He glared down. Sure enough, there was the unmistakable sight, steel items exposed by the flapping of their black coats.

"Shit."

"I'll tell the others." Still propelling forwards, you turned and pointed at your belts and then jabbed your thumb back, attempting to convey the information sufficiently. It worked.

"The enemy has manoeuvre gear. Prepare for that eventuality." Everyone muttered their understanding to the Commander and continued with the chase, the pair in front moving out of view as buildings were traversed. "It will get difficult from now on. Keep the pace." A more built up area meant a clear line of sight was impossible and they had to trust signals that might be left.

Just as you had feared, the six split up, two taking the left path with your friend in tow. Unspoken words were exchanged and you drew your sword, scraping a mark on the tiles, a couple of vertical lines in the direction of travel to denote it was your route and how many you pursued. Mike did the same, using the gas to cross the street and apply four horizontal slits, again explaining numbers along with identification. Hange was first to arrive at the junction and shouted back. "(F/N)'s this way, got two. Check the other side." Petra swept over and found the next sign.

"Mike has four."

"Brynn will be to the left." Levi knew you'd go after the woman and they divided their forces - he took Eld and Hange, Erwin the others, figures racing to catch up with their comrades. The Captain was sure you could handle it, his only concern was the captured female being discovered. That would spell disaster.

Fingers on the triggers, you got ready as those below were twitching at their sides, a sure sign that airborne escape was close at hand. Another turn was made along with your markings to show the new avenue and the inevitable happened; a face looked up, eyes straight into yours and you saw Brynn tighten her grip as an instruction was given, presumably something like 'hang on or fall, your choice.' Hooks shot out and you deployed your own in unison, pursuit now taking place by flight. It meant no signals could be left but you'd stamped on a tile before lifting off, smashing it in the hope someone would notice.

"Look. They must be in the air." Eld made the correct assumption and looked to Levi for orders, waiting for the go ahead. It was given in the form of a grumble and the three of them gave chase, citizens below gazing at the unexpected display above. There was no point in remaining unseen, presumed the pale man. The use of gear must have meant you had been spotted, hopefully only as a random human and not the one they really wanted.

"Quick, get on top of them. Bring those fuckers down." Hange laughed at the growled order and flew forwards, irritatingly enjoying herself. Levi scowled and shook his head, shooting left and right to use the walls for purchase, one after the other as he avoided overhanging balconies and strings of washing. Of course he was used to this kind of thing, practice in close quarters coming back with ease and finally he caught sight of you, almost in reach of the kidnappers. "Not too close (F/N)." Mumbling to himself, he saw an archway approaching and made for it, intending to swing round and cut the bastards off. In a sweeping motion, his body glided through the city air, twisting in what seemed liked suspended animation only to reconnect and present a blockade.

You noticed the move before it was complete, snarling and gaining ground, Brynn's fearful eyes now swimming in your line of vision. Something was wrong, though. Her mask. It was gone. Had they noticed? Working on the assumption that it fell off recently, you continued and glanced over just as Levi loomed before them. Taking the chance, you used their momentary surprise and made straight for the one who carried your friend - this part was a rescue now, Mike would be the intelligence gatherer. Foot out, you aimed for the face and collided heavily with a man's chin, ready to snatch his stolen loot away. A spark of blonde swept by and Eld grabbed out, carefully obtaining the goal and fleeing to higher safety with the other female as you swung out, blade severing the enemy's cables.

Tumbling to the road, he yelled in pain but got to his feet as you landed, vaguely aware of two allies taking down the other foe. Erwin had ordered no blood shed, contain and interrogate only so you stowed the large swords, hands up and ready to fight. The already injured male made for an easy opponent and you offered him blow after powerful blow, grunts of effort coming from your throat. He got a few in too, none incapacitating and you went for his neck, intending to deliver a final chop to render him useless. A hand came from nowhere and pulled the scarf from your face, wide eyes combining with an evil grin. Oh fuck.

"(F/N)!" Levi shouted from across the street, other man now secured with Hange sitting on top of him and you blocked the incoming punch, sending your own in swiftly and following with a harsh kick to the chest, felling the male once more. Drawing sharp metal, you pointed the tip into his throat and glared down, daring him to move.

"Don't be fucking stupid. Who are you? What do you want?"

"You, obviously."

"Why?" Digging in further, you leant over, waiting for an excuse to slit his flesh.

"You know why."

"Sorry to disappoint you, but there's nothing I can give. It was all a lie."

"That's what you think." Momentarily confused, you let down your guard but luckily you were joined at the last minute, solid boot connecting with ribs in a crack of bones.

"Shut the fuck up, you piece of shit. You're coming with us." The guy on his back started laughing, demonic sounds rattling from his mouth and you saw what was happening a split second too late. In a decisive move, he sat up suddenly and impaled himself on your blade, hot red blood spilling out into the back alley as he left this mortal coil with splutters and chokes.

"Oh fuck. Shit, no!" Flinching back, you tried to stop what had already occurred and looked on in horror as the noises ceased, leaving just a puddle of crimson liquid. "What the…?"

"Clever. Or stupid, depending on how you see it." You nodded at Levi's utterance, understanding that their rules were death before capture.

"Hey (F/N)? That's your first kill!"

"Fuck off, four eyes." Steely orbs got your attention and held you still. "It's not. He did that, not you."

"I don't care, Levi. Did you hear what he said?"

"Mm hmm. And I wouldn't put any stock in his stupid shitty words."

"How can you be so sure?"

"I can't. But trust me. It does no good to dwell. Don't keep it all inside until it eats you up, remember?" You gave a wan smile as some of your advice was served up.

"Yea, I remember." The others joined the morbid scene, Eld and Brynn from above and Erwin's group from the main road, large blonde enquiring about the situation.

"What happened?"

"Fucker killed himself. This one didn't though. I'm going to have fun getting information out of that little prick."

"Levi, calm. One thing at a time." The Commander looked over at the stricken man beneath Hange and sighed. "We followed ours as far as we could but they got away."

"From all of you?"

"Yes. They're exceptional with the gear."

"We fucking managed it."

"Listen, it's not a competition. You're unrivalled in these settings, the rest of us are more at home elsewhere."

"Tch."

"How are we going to clean this all up?"

"We'll have to improvise, Gunther. See what you can find. Luckily this place isn't overlooked." Erwin oversaw the operation, watching his subordinates locate a variety of old clothes in abandoned buildings, wrapping the corpse up tightly and soaking up what blood they could. It didn't take long before the band of soldiers were returning home, taking to the roofs once more to avoid being seen, captive bound to Mike's strong back, dead body on the one in charge.

Eventually walking back into the headquarters under cover of darkness, you spoke quietly. "You ok Brynn?"

"Yea I'm fine. Feel a bit sick, it's odd when you're not in control of the gear." She glanced over and got close. "What's going on?"

"You'll have to ask him." Pointing to the highest ranking one here, you shrugged in apology. "I can't say. Sorry." Your friend nodded and yawned, exhausting day coming to a close. Debriefing would take place in the morning, along with a decision on what to do with the man you'd brought back. No questions were asked by anyone who saw you all enter, the look on your tired faces suggesting now was not the right time. A few weak farewells were given and you all went in separate directions, the deceased already hidden to be taken care of tomorrow as well. His last words rung in your ears and you felt torn - you'd made peace with the fact you had nothing special to awaken, but now you had been thrown back into turmoil all over again.


	16. Disclosure

The official line had been delivered, a threat to the Corps more important than exploring outside of the walls, one which was currently being investigated. Most of the soldiers believed it, relieved in part at not having to risk their lives another time. In reality, the interrogations were rather fruitless so far and three days after the operation, four people sat together in the Commander's office all looking at the one who stood. Levi leant against the wall, arms crossed and scowl in place, never meeting any of the eyes that gazed upon him.

"What's the update?"

"Not much to tell, Erwin. He's still not fucking talking." The captured man had remained tight lipped for the most part, all but for one singular truth, one which had to be beaten out of him. "The only thing he's said so far is probably inconsequential." You wondered if this had something to do with the reason why he'd been distant, choosing to stare out of the window while you scrubbed the floor instead of making shitty comments about your work. His red knuckles had been evident too, a show of how far he was pushing himself to get anything out of the prisoner.

"We'll decide if it's of use or not, Levi." The man who was addressed huffed and tried to burn a hole into the desk with his glare, shifting position to rest his weight on the other leg. I should've told her this last night, he scolded internally. Now wasn't the best time, however putting off sharing the scant information had been too easy. Things always caught up though, came back to bite people in the ass.

"Fine." Sniffing once, Levi tilted his head back against the bricks, bored expression now facing the ceiling. "He said that (F/N)'s grandfather visited them way before the old idiot came to us."

"What?"

"Now (F/N), let him carry on." Hange spoke gently and held your hand, soothing and smiling warmly. Pausing to ensure you were finished, the dark haired male started back up.

"He said he had information about a potential weapon, one person who could be used in the fight against their enemies, mainly the poor, the unlawful and those who oppose the fucking King." He spoke with venom and distaste, the grip on your hand growing harder also. "They paid him for it. Presumably the same money he then gave to us."

"And who are they, exactly?" Now it was Mike's turn to include himself, usually staying quiet and letting the rest argue it out.

"That, he won't say."

"Why did they believe my grandad?"

"No fucking idea."

"And why did he tell them that? Other than total lunacy, obviously."

"(F/N), do you have any siblings?"

"No Erwin, why does that…oh." It dawned on you that in a haze of madness, your relative had probably done what he considered to be protection, create a real threat to keep his only grandchild locked up inside the headquarters and away from the harshness of life out on the fields. What a sentimental fool. Shaking your head, you started to laugh, not a manic one like last time he was discussed but a more genuine offering. "He did it out of love." No one spoke at first, letting you absorb the reality and consider how the crazy man had at least some kind of clarity in his troubled mind, even if it did put you in danger at the same time. He'd meant well. Hange broke the contemplation.

"When did you see him last, (F/N)? Is he still alive?"

"The day I left to enlist. That's the last time I saw any of my family or friends. He didn't say anything, no hint of recognition that I was following his plan." You snorted and shook your head. "Probably forgot all about it. Could be dead by now." Intense manual labour wasn't the kind of atmosphere that acted kindly to elderly bodies, especially in this weather. The grip on your hand tightened again and you looked up into the friendly face by your side, offering a tired smile back.

"So we're in the same fucking position we have been for a year."

"Not necessarily, Levi." Erwin always seemed three steps ahead and had that glint in his eyes, brows raised slightly as if they held the meaning of life deep inside the thick bushes. A small huff was pushed from the stoic man and he nodded once before growling darkly.

"You just let us know when you're ready to explain, Commander. (L/N)? Stables."

"Oh come on…"

"Now." A steely glare advised you he was certainly not joking, but you weren't sure why he'd suddenly decided to send you off to that heap of shit again. Narrowing your stare, (e/c) shards dug into his blank features to see if any clues lay within, however as usual there was nothing to be found, only pure asshole.

"Fuck you." The flash of your figure exited the office quickly with a slam of the door, angry footsteps audible as they marched away. Three confused people looked over for clarification, the Captain meeting their frowns coolly.

"Can't let her start slacking. She still needs to earn her fucking keep."

"Give (F/N) a break, Levi. This isn't exactly fun for her."

"If you want to play games and run around like a little child with her Mike, then be my guest. I, however, will get the most out of that brat while she's still here."

"Still here?" The answer to the blonde's query was given in the form of a full on strop, pale man storming off with fire in his eyes and leaving his colleagues behind to mull over the last minute.

~~~~~~

Ripping the scarf from your head, which had indeed saved your hair from Shallot, you shoved it deep into the back pocket of your trousers as the sun started it's farewell, last threads of day dwindling in a display of red that also heralded an impending new year. Even the pretty scene couldn't lift your mood, anger having grown with each passing minute spent mucking out the horses. The job didn't particularly enrage you, it was the manner in which you'd ended up here that caused such wrath. For the past three days, Levi had been out of sorts, more moody and quiet than usual and unwilling to discuss the reasons. And now he was sending you away to deal with literal shit. Stomping sullenly inside, you swept through the busy halls and made for home, aware that whilst the covering had protected you from bites, it most certainly hadn't eliminated the invasion of hay.

Menacing eyes stared down, following your swift feet as they progressed further, all of which meant that the approaching attack remained unnoticed. A biting grip took your upper arm as you were wrenched round, direction forcibly changed in a second and you stumbled to stay upright.

"Get off!"

"Shut up, (L/N)."

"Levi, I said get the fuck off, what are you doing?" Dragging your body down the corridors, he led the struggling woman through crowds towards his quarters, shouts and exclamations narrating the whole journey. The man threw you inside, door locked and a stand off began, fiery gazes shooting mutual annoyance through the short space of air between the two.

"What is wrong with you recently?"

"Don't forget you're still in out debt, (F/N)."

"Debt? I didn't ask for this! You know what? I might as well leave. Take my chances and go back home, do some demeaning work for someone else who won't be such a changeable fucking bastard."

"And get yourself killed? Great plan."

"Better than this shit." A flicker of remorse crossed the porcelain face in front of you, one which had been seen before and you softened a bit, curiosity seeping in. "Levi…tell me what's going on in that head. I seriously haven't got the energy to deal with this." He stayed silent, weighing up the situation. His behaviour had a source, a perfectly acceptable explanation for it all and he wanted to apologise, yearned to say sorry but the word was stuck in his throat, damn pride and habit denying what should be said. You deserved it, a release from the tension so he decided on a strange and different route, give you a physical option to get revenge. Also, seeing your wrath once again was too alluring.

Silver eyes sparked and you faltered. You knew that look all too well, but if he thought that this would work, he had another thing coming, this can't be solved with…

Any further debate was ceased as lips smashed against yours, strong hands searching your form and you reciprocated instantly without argument, fingers grabbing insistently into raven hair. Coming to your senses, you pulled back and scowled, touch still on one another as heat was exchanged. Did you stop this, or use the intense resentment to your advantage? Whatever the problem was with him, Levi remained someone close to you, an intriguing and often irritating man, one who you also knew had fierce personal struggles every day - that kind of fragility would lead to this temper and you granted him a second chance. Well, you would eventually.

Not quite ready to forgive and forget, you gave a low snarl and allowed passion to combine with outrage, mouths connected again as you fought viciously against his tongue, ripping at clothes to remove every single garment with speed. It may have seemed like the most ridiculous course of action, the way he'd treated you pointing towards taking the completely opposite stance but you couldn't help yourself, the prospect felt too inviting. Now naked, you pushed the man to the sofa, dropping down to straddle his legs, lips nipping at his neck as palms squeezed and kneaded your flesh.

"I fucking hate you sometimes, Levi." Biting sharply onto his skin, you felt him tense and grind his hard member into your stomach, rubbing impatiently to create friction.

"And you can be a petulant little shit."

"Fuck off." Reaching below, you positioned his cock and slid with precision, taking the stiff shaft inside in one angry slam. Groans called out and you held onto his shoulders, the one you had just bruised with your teeth getting a more forceful grip. Levi gasped lightly and looked up into your furious eyes as a fast, unrelenting pace commenced, hands now on your ass as he watched you ride him.

"That's it (F/N)…let it all out…ahh yea…"

"Fuck…shut up…ngah..." Panting, your harsh words came out in a growl, treating him to vengeful thrusts. The hint of animal indignation in your (e/c) orbs was hugely arousing, the way your body moved in delicious rolls captivating and he started to lose his mind, only the sensations remaining bright and lucid. 

"Oh shit…come on…show me how pissed you are…" Incensed enough to allow yourself to be encapsulated by the moment, you kept grinding onto him hard and raised an arm, slapping ferociously across his pale cheek.

"I said shut the fuck up, Levi." A glimmer of his own ire made an appearance but it was short lived and he pressed his fingers into you, giving his own ramming motions as he bucked up. Rasping voices mumbled in strings of pleasure, peaks waiting on the sidelines and ready to go. The power you had over him was delectable, letting the build up of dark emotion drive you onwards. Tingles in your stomach demanded attention and you moaned loudly, almost there so soon. "Oh fuck…yea…fuck..."

"Mmm yes (F/N)…ah shit yes…" Levi clenched his teeth and brought you down roughly in time using the hold on your butt, flesh banging together noisily as a well known knot formed below.

"Dammit…say sorry Levi…say fucking sorry…" He couldn't speak, only able to blunder incoherently as insane strands of ecstasy flowed through his being. You didn't care, orgasm hitting like a ton of bricks and rendering you incapable of anything but small screams of euphoria, joined by his deeper series of groans as you started to calm, whispers spilling out. "Fuck…oh fuck…Levi…oh shit…" Head down on his, you slowed and gulped in air, hips still moving as he softened slightly. Wet kisses were applied but you maintained the connection, not content to leave just yet.

"Shit (F/N)…stop that or…" Over sensitive nerves lit up with desire, continued motions inviting round two already and you sighed, ignoring the mess between your legs. Levi could feel himself getting hard again, the soft, warm pushes up and down his member causing unprecedented lust. Closing his eyes, he leant his head back and gave in, breath shallow and heart racing. And then something came to the fore. "You slapped me."

"You deserved it." Picking up the pace, you smirked and got ready to unleash what remained of your now dwindling fury but the man had other plans. In a flash you were on your knees, hands holding onto the arm of the couch as fingers tugged your hair.

"I can't believe you fucking hit me, (F/N)." Teasing at your entrance with his tip, he circled around agonisingly. "Your turn to pay." In an instant, he filled you again from behind, pumping savagely with grunts of effort. The hold on your locks intensified and pulled your head back, his other strong limb wrapped around the front to dig into your throat, scar from the last expedition visible. Levi's body lay heavily on your back as he pounded fast into you, hot breath at your ear. It was divine, sharing aggravation in such a way that created crazy enjoyment, built up tension dealt with in a way neither of you knew possible - anger management at it's best. Smiling with an open mouth, all you could do was make a series of squeals as yet another climax threatened your still buzzing walls.

"Don't ever slap me again…ahhh yea…fuck…"

"Ohhhh…ah…ahhh…Levi yes! Hell yes!" The exquisite and vigorous pushes sent you wild, squeaking in abandonment and you clenched tightly, mewls of potent delight announcing your second release, shaking with tremors beneath his form.

"Ah fuck…take it…gnahhhh…" Giving a series of jarring thrusts, he burst forth in brilliant satisfaction, spilling yet more fluid to add to his previous peak. Finally Levi stopped and sat back, struggling to get enough oxygen as you turned and flopped onto his sweaty chest. Once steady, you swallowed with a click and laughed.

"You'd better tell me what the fuck is going on."

"Later. Shit." Holding you close, he regained composure and smirked. "Shower. Now. You've got crap in your hair." Sharing the small space, the two of you washed slowly, paying attention to one another's curves and contours, assistance given to rid you of grass and other foreign objects that had been brought along. It was a show of care and affection, miles apart from recent activities and you revelled in the closeness, taking in every inch of the man with studious eyes. Once dried and dressed, Levi lay on the bed and held out a hand, inviting you to join. Taking the offer up, you curled into him, cheek on his ribs as you listened to the slowed beats under dense bones as he spoke.

"Whatever Erwin's planning, it ends in one of two ways, both paths ultimately unsatisfactory." Staying down, you knew it was easier to speak candidly without someone staring. "If we get the bastards, the threat is eliminated and you go into full service. If they get you, then…" He took a deep drag of air and finished. "Each option puts you in harm's way and I'm not prepared to let that happen."

"Levi…"

"No. I won't. And that's why I acted like a prick earlier. I was trying to turn things back to before, back to normal."

"There's no escaping the truth, ok? Something's going to go down and I'm not about to stand back and allow others to do it for me. This is my shit, I'm involved, I have to help."

"But…"

"Listen." Propping up on one elbow, you gazed into reticent grey wells, the man's delicate finger tracing along your jaw and chin. "I'm a strong woman. I can fight."

"Don't I just fucking know it." He gave a tiny smile and you grinned, red ghostly mark on his face a testament to the fact.

"Sorry Levi." Becoming serious, he turned to come close, noses touching as he stroked your cheek.

"No, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have been so fucking selfish. And I shouldn't have acted like a spoilt brat."

"Apology accepted." Kissing lightly, you sat back and gave one of your best looks, one which meant business. "So, talk to me. What's bothering you the most?" Despite his admission, it felt like there was something more, a heavy weight that needed lifting. Levi sighed.

"I knew you were a fucking witch."

"Don't avoid the question."

"Alright, give me a chance." Gathering his thoughts, he pondered how to actually say this. He'd skirted round the issue but hadn't outright vocalised it. You noted his stance and lay down again, face in the crook of his neck, warm skin so soft and inviting. The man silently thanked the understanding move and opened his mouth to speak. "I said I wouldn't put you in danger."

"Mmm?"

"Fucking hell." His muttered grumble was ended with a strong exhale as the truth was brought out kicking and screaming. "Because I can't lose you, (F/N). Of all the people that have left me behind, I can't add you to the list. I just can't."

"Levi?"

"What?"

"I won't tell you I'll never be amongst that number, much like you wouldn't promise me that you'll always come back. It's how it is. What matters is the time we have together. Ok?" Levi nodded and held tight, smelling the scent of soap in your wet hair, yet another thing to add to the mental collection of memories to keep with him in case, in case the unthinkable manifested and cruel fate took you away. But you were right - the here and now was important and with that in mind, he surrendered to the serene moment and allowed a small smile, one unseen by you.

Rumbling had sadly broken the spell and you found yourself making for the mess hall and dinner alone, a double entrance not quite the right thing to do. Humming lowly, you pushed through and walked over to get some food to silence your loud stomach, initially not picking up on the change in atmosphere. People had been speaking recently about both your freak-out in sparring and also the strange aborted expedition, but now they had a much better thing to discuss. Unbeknownst to you, the small snickers of laughter and whispered words were solidly on one slightly unrelated subject. Heaping your plate, you looked over to see the usual spot was occupied so scanned the room, Hange waving dramatically for you to join her and two others, namely Mike and Levi. The former had a smirk on his face and the pale man sat with an expression like thunder, eyes as close to being shut without the lids touching - that was pure anger.

"Hey (F/N)! Come sit!" The woman was bouncing on her seat, glee on her features and you tentatively lowered down to the chair, frown in place.

"What's going on?" The knowing looks from all around suddenly became apparent, the gossip and smiles. This couldn't be good and Mike delivered the start of the bad news.

"You do know that people can hear, right?"

"And?"

"And see, yes?"

"Just get on with it, weirdo."

"Well, at least thirty of these guys saw you getting hauled off by grumpy here in the direction of his room."

"So what?"

"So on it's own, nothing new there from this sadistic dick but there was something else this time. Something very, very loud and very, very inappropriate."

"Oh shit…oh no, no no no." Burying your face in your arms, head on the table you tried to disappear, wished for the world to end and take the embarrassment away. But, as sod's law dictated, it only got worse, Erwin's voice deep and close.

"Which one of you is going to explain?"


	17. Until Next Time

Five people sat together in the midst of the now rowdy hubbub, voices overly loud at the appearance of the Commander, topics changed swiftly as a finger flicked the top of your still bowed head. Slowly lifting your face, blue eyes stared into yours with pious expectancy, large brows raised in superiority. Struggling where to find the correct words, you wondered why this was so bad - you weren't disobeying any rules as far as you were aware, yet it seemed like a telling-off was on the way. Croaking weakly, you opened and closed your mouth uselessly and a low tone saved the day. Sort of.

"What's to fucking explain? You need me to have 'the chat' with you, Erwin?"

"Thank you Levi, that won't be necessary." The conversation was held quietly, hushed sentences and gripes.

"Then what? She's not on my squad, no conflict of interest."

"No one does my paperwork for me, so I'd say it's preferential treatment."

"Shut up, Mike."

"Could say the same thing to you, (F/N)." Blushing furiously, you looked down again and grumbled to yourself.

"It's not my fault if she can't fucking contain herself." And now the man supposed to be on your side was against you, it appeared.

"Enough, leave them alone." At least Hange was nice. "So adorable!" Or maybe not. She pinched your red cheeks, earning her a slap on the hand.

"How long?" Erwin was back as interrogator again and you mumbled at the table.

"Couple of months nearly."

"Couple of…? Right. I knew something was up."

"Up quite a lot, probably."

"Hange!" Glaring over into her manic face, you went to speak some more when a hand pulled your collar and you were on your feet, being marched out of the hall towards the nearest exit by the back of your neck. Whistles and calls came from all around and Levi graced those gathered with the middle finger over his shoulder, kicking the wooden door open harshly to remove you both from the centre of attention.

"Fucking idiots. None of their damn business." Changing grip to your waist, he smirked. "Never mind." He had no idea why he was being so flippant, normally one for intense secrecy when it came to anything personal and he surprised himself by giving no shits. Nothing untoward was going on though, so there wasn't any point in getting worked up.

"Levi?"

"Mmm?"

"I'm hungry. I never got to eat." Silver eyes rolled and he stopped, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"You've got to be shitting me. Ok. Get back upstairs, start on those ledgers."

"Yes, Captain."

"Don't be cheeky." Winking, you hurried off and gave your finest attempt at a seductive strut, hips swinging and a bounce in your step. Suddenly you didn't care either.

Only ten minutes had passed and you turned the page, completing sums and ticking off supplies with the ink in small marks, taking care to allow it to dry before leafing over so as not to cause smudges. A small knock came from the entrance to Levi's quarters and you leapt up to help, tray precarious in his hands.

"How did you get so much?"

"Kitchen. Who in their right mind is going to tell me no?"

"True." Laughing, you cleared a space and set out the cups, tea poured as you laid into the bread and stew, starved belly finally satiated. "Thanks Levi."

"Tch." Smiling, you pointed down.

"You need to eat too. Keep your strength up."

"Fine." Tiny mouthfuls were taken and you shook your head. Such a strange man sometimes.

~~~~~~

A week before the next planned expedition and you had kept out of sight where possible, away from Erwin and his judgemental azure stare. For some reason he had taken badly to the revelation and always looked on the brink of admonishing you, so scuttling into hiding was the best course of action. Training had continued along with jibes and digs from your colleagues, lewd questions asked and details requested, none of which you justified with an answer. Brynn came to your aid frequently, scolding childish behaviour with a motherly tone. She didn't need to but it was heart warming all the same.

Mike wasn't as insufferable as you would've imagined, probably due to the fact he knew already and had seen there was more to it than just physical need and carried on as normal, dragging you into practical jokes and yet more thefts, actions you took joy in as a type of revenge on those who tried to invade your sex life. Hange made every effort to obtain information however that proved fruitless too, your lips well and truly sealed. Of course some intelligence was out there, overheard liaisons giving fuel to the steamy fire. Levi maintained his questionable professional stance in public, continuing to insult and push you around, juvenile snaps still held in what was now a form of anticipation, foreplay even. The rough way you'd dealt with each other that time had awakened something so every kick, scuffle and squabble added to the relationship. Seeing as you never used your unsecure room anymore, the few items you owned had been shifted into his, two sets of gear sitting together by the door, a collection of books turned into nearly a shelf-full. No point in hanging around.

Levi's squad said nothing to his face, kept quiet and seemingly uncaring about the whole thing but you imagined in seven day's time, camaraderie would kick in and a few comments might be passed his way. Currently relaxing under a tree, you flapped at a fly that tried to cause issues and succeeded in removing it from your presence.

"(F/N)?"

"Yea Brynn?"

"You think you'll ever come out with us?" Lying on your backs and looking up into the clouds, you smiled and turned your head.

"Soon I hope. Just got to sort out whoever those people are."

"Why do they want you?"

"I really don't know." Lying blatantly, you followed Erwin's orders at keeping it quiet. "We'll find out I suppose."

"Aren't you scared?"

"A bit. But look who I have around me. All of you are so strong, so supportive. I'm sure it'll be ok." Sighing, your friend raised her arms and splayed her fingers, encompassing her line of vision.

"I talk to him every day, you know. Tell him what's been going on, how I'm doing, what the next mission outside is all about. He's listening, I know it."

"He is, Brynn." She dropped her hand and grabbed hold of yours tightly, smiling when your squeeze was given back.

"Thanks (F/N)."

"What for?"

"Being here. No one else has the talent you do."

"They're dealing with their own problems."

"True. But there's something about the way you understand."

"I could never fathom what you guys go through. I just like to help where I can."

"It helps. It really helps." Holding each other's stares, you tried to bestow her with more courage and support, transfer a sense of well-being that would hopefully come out in the heat of battle.

"Break it up, you two." Glancing over, you saw the pale figure getting closer, shirt sleeves rolled up in the unseasonably warm weather. "Erwin needs us."

"I'll see you later, yea?"

"Sure thing, (F/N)." Brynn leant in and left you with a kiss on your cheek, remaining under the canopy as you got up to obey orders. Waving, you left her behind and smiled.

"What does he want? I've been able to keep out of his way so far."

"It's about our friends. We're stepping up the offensive."

"When?"

"Soon." Levi looked stern, glare forwards as you strode across the grounds to find out what awaited you.

~~~~~~

"Absolutely not."

"Levi, this isn't a debate. It's an order."

"A fucking stupid one, Commander." Spitting his words, the scowling Captain challenged his superior with a steely glare.

"We need everyone trusted on this. Myself included, so it's not like I'm sending you out on your own."

"Oh, I'm feeling much better now, thank you." Sarcasm dripped as he shifted to stare out the window. Nine people. That was the magic number, his team and those five present right now. Mike had done some more investigating and noted that the six who lingered around every day nearby left at sundown, presumably back to their headquarters. The plan was as simple as it was stupid in Levi's mind - follow and obtain a location. Once discovered, further details could be garnered and next steps put into place. The enemy's skills were undoubtedly proficient and their disregard for life just as dangerous, hence why you were all required in case of something going wrong.

"I'll ignore that. Right. Are we all clear? Keep your distance, no uniform and Levi? Prepare your squad. We go tonight."

"Tonight?"

"Yes, (F/N). I understand you're our most capable with the gear in the dark, apart from this guy here. Use it well."

"I will, Erwin."

"Good. We'll leave in secret, take an unwatched route over the back perimeter, two at a time and set up our posts quietly. Hand signals only. Dismissed." Chairs scraped and nods were shared. It was on in a matter of hours.

~~~~~~

Levi had briefed his allies and you wrapped the scarf around tightly, body still buzzing from the past twenty minutes of passion. "Wait (F/N)." The man stopped you covering your face and came near, lips pressing against yours strongly. "Stay fucking safe." Hugging closely, the pair of you tried to block out the impending journey and concentrated on each other, emotions running high. Erwin had decided that you wouldn't be in danger given the team and your abilities. Also, outnumbering the people in black was an advantage and that along with your desire to be involved in your own fate had sealed the deal. Levi didn't bother trying to dissuade you, aware of how strongly you felt, so instead stayed silent on the issue.

"You too, Levi." Dark clothing in place, you checked one another's gear and mumbled in agreement - it was time. Silently making your way to the back fence, you met the others and huddled together in a group, awaiting orders. A few jokes came from Mike, nervous laughter courtesy of Hange and a comment was made by Oluo.

"This is nothing compared to titans. Tch."

"Don't be so full of yourself. That kind of attitude gets you hurt."

"Oh Petra, no one can hurt me."

"If you say so."

"Focus, everyone. First pair, move out." Eld and Hange nimbly leapt over at their leader's instruction, off to remain in the shadows at their designated spot. After five minutes, the next two departed and it was your turn, Mike by your side. Turning to Levi, you nodded once.

"Until next time?"

"Until next time, (F/N)." Eyes flashed as you pulled the covering up over your mouth and nose, a small wink offered to the man, causing him to smirk as he watched you disappear. Erwin was left with his second in command and Gunther - they would be a trio, covering the largest ground.

"Ready? Let's go." Making their way to the allotted space, silver slits scanned carefully, avoiding areas still touched by fading daylight and watching for those under scrutiny. Positions were secured and nods offered from around the rooftops, bodies all ready to spring at a moment's notice. The ones you tracked usually hung around here every day, just outside the Corps' home unless it was time for an expedition; then they would stay by the main gates as had been experienced already. Never did they try to gain entry, that would mean certain death given how many loyal soldiers lived in the HQ. If Mike's timings were right, it wouldn't be long before action was needed.

"Always six."

"There could be more, Gunther."

"Maybe. But Commander, why are they here?"

"That is what we hope to find out soon."

Across the street, you lay low and saw the dwindling sun finally set, last streams of colour dissolving into the dark skies. Glances were given and one large hand was raised. With a pounding heart, (e/c) eyes observed the exodus and you clutched your triggers, aware that these people had gear too. In formation, the nine figures moved out and prowled above, proximity of buildings yet again allowing easy travels. The hustle and bustle of humanity grew larger and more dense as you got closer to populated space, markets still in full swing and general chatter being held. Six determined adversaries swept through unhindered as they kept a steady pace, authoritative footsteps traversing the roads.

As crowds began to thin again, residential area reached, you saw a faint gesture from below, a conversation or signal. Shooting a look to Mike, you noticed his expression - he'd seen it too. Holding up two fingers, the man advised there was something going on and everyone tensed, duty the only thing on all of your minds. Levi glared intently and gave his own gesture; they were being joined. Three extra people made your numbers equal and you groaned inwardly, element of a larger force now scrubbed away.

Without warning they flew to the tiled roofs, all in different directions which could point to only one thing - you'd been spotted. No need for secrecy any more, Erwin shouted out. "Switch to gear! Follow them at all costs, don't let them get away again!" It was depressingly similar to last time, once more on the back foot and you began to allow doubt to creep in, soul chilled by the change in control. Sailing through dim streets, you kept an eye on your comrades to ensure everyone was in place, keeping the ranks tight and as discussed. A split could very well occur, in which case the original pairings would remain, that was unless the whole lot of them went their own ways. In that event, instant decisions would be made to take what was now one each.

Hange spun to the side, using bricks expertly as she screeched a kind of war cry, glasses gleaming from the brightness of her stare and you smiled at her vitality. Levi soared past, eyes forward but a faint change in his stance told you something bad was coming. Sure enough, his loud voice cut through your bones.

"There's more. I count twenty."

"Twenty?! Fucking hell."

"Concentrate, (F/N)."

"Don't engage unless you have to. These guys are willing to die today. We are not." The Commander's tone was steadfast and you looked over to Petra, determination painted on her features as she added her own call.

"We just need to keep up! Come on." Gas came in bursts along with the sound of hooks connecting to people's houses, crumbling pieces falling to the cobbles below and you frowned. Did they know you were coming? Or was this just normal procedure, always a score waiting but you only ever spotted six? The latter would eliminate the possibility of a mole in the Corps so you clung onto that one, making a swift dive to pick up speed and narrowly avoiding the ground, favoured techniques brought into play with no hesitation. Those you pursued hadn't parted company, remained as one which confused you - why not make it harder, unless…

"Ambush!" Yelling at the top of your lungs, the last thing you were vividly aware of was at least another ten coming straight for you, black coats billowing around white shirts, unfamiliar faces leering as the worst happened, arms wrapping around you viciously and bringing you to street level. Kicking and flailing, you attempted to free yourself, those above blocked by the larger force and another male landed by your side, syringe in hand as he grinned a devious smile, one you would come to know better in time.

"It'll only hurt a bit." Thick with malice, he spoke lowly and stuck the needle into your neck. Crying out, you looked up to see Levi attempting to break his way through the throng that now stood in the way, eyes demonic with rage as you reached out in a useless gesture, light fading along with your consciousness.

"L..Levi.."

"(F/N)! Fuck, I'm coming! Hang on!" You were up in the air again, pulled away on someone's back, restraints applied without your knowledge and the final image emblazoned onto your retinas was your man screaming with fury as Erwin grabbed him from behind. Then your eyes closed, useless and foggy as your brain shut down, body hanging limply from the abductor's fleeing figure.

"Erwin get the fuck off of me!" Legs shooting out wildly, the incensed male struggled against the blonde, watching you fade from sight as the veritable army of enemies dispersed almost as soon as they had appeared.

"We can't take on that many, Levi. It'll only end in death."

"Fuck you! Let me fucking go, I'll kill you myself." His protestations became weaker as the rest of the group joined them on the ground, cuts and bruises on all involved as a sign of the clash.

"Levi? They have guns."

"I don't give a shit, all I need his my bare fucking hands. I'll get her and annihilate every last one of those bastards." Another voice was added to the depressing mix.

"We had to pull back. Lost them."

"Thank you Mike. Everyone, return home. We move outside the walls at the end of the week. Concentrate on that."

"Are you fucking kidding me, old man?"

"I said go." The others stalled a moment and watched the waning fight, the strength leaving the Captain's body visibly as his face was pulled into a grimace of anguish. Obeying orders, they returned to the roofs, leaving two friends behind in the deserted alleyway.

"No. No this isn't right." Last threads of effort seeped from his pores, writhing limbs coming to a stop and Levi stood unmoving, unable to give any more as the man at his back continued to hold him tightly, ability to exert effort now gone from his failing form. Staring into the distance, he felt his heart shatter into a thousand shards of ice, all digging in with morbid precision and making it hard to breathe, ragged pants forced out of his parted, dry lips. Grey eyes dulled and he spoke quietly, uttering fragile words he never thought he would say, especially not in the presence of his commanding officer.

"I never even got to tell (F/N) that I love her."


	18. Struggles

Cold stone was pressed against your cheek, body shivering in the dark room and you tried to open your eyes, struggling against the fog of whatever had been injected within earlier. Moving slightly, icy shots burst through your legs and you managed to curl round to look down, almost non-existent light allowing a faint glimpse of your current state. Most of the clothing worn for the mission had gone, leaving you with only a black top and white underwear, lower limbs exposed across the paved floor. A glint suggested something else and you raised your knees, shackles shining out from your ankles, chains dragging behind. Great. Hands next, but that was harder as they were secured at your back in presumably similar bounds.

There was no pain, nothing to make you suppose any physical harm had occurred at least, however a lingering nausea threatened, presumably after effects of the stuff that rendered you unconscious. Turning your head carefully, you saw there were no items in here, just your body. Brick walls were seamless, lacking windows or fixtures and the door was wooden and sturdy, slight crack underneath providing the small shard of illumination. So basically, no clues as to their intentions and no way to judge the passing of time. Frowning, you shuffled up to a sitting position, brain muggy and stomach fragile as a grunt of effort came from within. Sighing deeply, you recalled that last vision from when they took you away, Levi's screaming face and the way Erwin held him back.

It was probably just as well, you supposed. If the Commander hadn't restrained him, eight against nearly thirty would've ended disastrously and the thought of them putting their lives at risk for you was unacceptable. The danger was made clear, you were well aware of what might happen and no one could have imagined how many of the enemy would turn up. Levi was also under no illusions, potential pitfalls laid out bare. Yet it still hurt, excruciating bolts of sorrow that came from much more than being imprisoned. They could lock you up, keep you isolated, do whatever horrific things they were planning but one void would always cause a greater agony - being apart from that man.

Once the headquarters had been reached, Erwin tried to speak with the Captain to no avail. The short male had closed himself off, shut down and held his stony expression as if nothing had happened, eyes dead and lacking in any sign of life or mischief as he made for his room. No, the room he shared with you.

Storming down the halls, Levi ignored any passers by; not that they usually tried to hold a conversation but there was something about his posture that exuded 'fuck off' more so than normal, people shrinking out of his way to allow swift passage. Slamming the door shut, he didn't bother with the lock and threw his gear to the side, next to the now empty space that usually contained your own set. Staring at the vacant corner, he spun swiftly and gathered up the uniform shirt you had carelessly discarded on the sofa, closing his lids and holding the fabric to his face, breathing deeply to capture your scent while it was still strong. Visions crossed his mind's eye, all of the little things stored up for this kind of moment, ones he hoped to never use - your crinkled frown of concentration, sweet smile, scowl that meant no real malice, only playful annoyance.

With a snarl, Levi dropped the garment and tossed a chair against the wall as if it were made of feathers, wood shattering on impact and he turned his attention to the china set that still contained some of the tea you had shared recently. Smashes of porcelain rang through the corridors, a few people flinching at the sound that was joined by a feral growl. They scurried away, not wanting to know what was going on and obliviously hoped you weren't in there.

After ten minutes of destruction, the broken man stood panting, surrounded by splintered pieces of his meagre life, furniture obliterated all around. Fists clenched, he punched at bricks in rage until he had nothing more to give, chest hitching in wretched breaths. Levi leant his forehead to the cool surface and squeezed his eyes shut once more, arms loose. Channelling the rage, he blamed Erwin for not letting him pursue, blamed those who took you, blamed himself. Dark spirals coiled through his bleak, empty soul and a singular bright realisation made itself known, words spoken in your soft voice coming through. 'Don't fight yourself. Deal with your demons or they'll eat you up.'

Straightening, the Captain moved to the window and looked up, finding the faintly red star that you liked to gaze at. You'd once told him that someone said it wasn't actually a star but a planet, one where people lived in peace and without struggles. Measured intakes of air replaced the previous fast gulps and Levi nodded. Mumbling quietly, he recounted the names of those lost to him, the most important people now missing. Starting with his mother, he spoke softly and murmured two more, the friends he was closest to all those years ago. Continuing, the man's stare remained locked onto your planet and concluded the list. But he didn't add your name. You were out there somewhere.

~~~~~~

Cold water woke you from a troubled and uncomfortable sleep, liquid thrown across your already frozen body and you shrieked, scrambling up to sit quickly as your eyes were assaulted by light from a lamp. The grin that accompanied the rude awakening was looming close, man crouching down and dropping a black bag to the floor. A woman stood behind by the now closed door, light hair tied back and lips full. She could have been quite pretty if it wasn't for the evil in her glare.

"Well (F/N), finally I get ta play. I suppose y'know why you're here?"

"Piss off." Staying resolute, you attempted to look strong and defiant despite the shivers on your skin. Your abductor laughed and shook his head.

"Wrong answer. We'll get there, though." Large hands opened the leather carrier to reveal medical equipment, sharp and shiny metal objects and vials of liquid. "So, I'll try again. Maybe my question wasn't right. How 'bout this one - what's your purpose?" Now it was your turn to giggle, crazy hiccups of dark humour coming out.

"I have no purpose. That guy who you paid for information? He was my grandfather. The most deluded man you could ever meet. So you see," you shrugged. "It was all a massive waste of time. I can't do anything different, I'm just a normal human being." A faint flicker crossed the features of the one you addressed but it disappeared quickly, replaced by demonic glee.

"We'll see about that." Reaching into the bag, he brought out an empty needle and motioned for his accomplice to join him. "Hold 'er still."

"No! Fuck off, let go!" Struggling against the restraints, you twisted and turned to put up the best fight you could. If they were going to mess with you, you'd make it hard work.

"Stay still, slut. It's just gonna hurt more if you wriggle round like a worm." You spat in his face and stared with fury, eyes burning as finally you were overcome, female containing your body tightly. "That's better." The pointy steel was pushed into your pinned arm roughly and without care, circular handles pulled down to fill the waiting glass with your blood. Teeth gritted, you showed no sign of pain, not allowing them to see anything weak as the large item was withdrawn. "One's enough?"

"No. I need more." The blonde behind you spoke in your ear and yet another syringe came into view, going for the other arm this time.

"Don't worry. I'll leave ya with just the right amount." You didn't know how many they took, but by the time the extraction was finished your head felt light, body floating in sickening swirls. Stashing their loot, the ageing man gave his parting words.

"Let's take a look. Find out what's so damn special about ya, see if all of that protection was worth it." His voice was muddy and distant and you were released, frail form dropping easily to the floor as dim eyes watched them leave. This was only just beginning and they obviously had no intention of believing what you said.

~~~~~~

The Corps had been advised of impending new recruits and of your situation to a degree, Erwin offering scant details at breakfast to a throng of shocked faces. Levi sat by the Commander's side as usual, expression bored and uncaring as the still sharp stare scanned the hall. No one would make eye contact, cringing away when the silver shards met theirs, all apart from one set, those of your friend. Brynn held his glare easily and the man stood, head twitching to suggest she should follow.

Out in the corridor he sighed and waited, joined by the one in charge also.

"How could you?"

"Brynn…"

"No Erwin, I'm talking to him." Pointing with a shaky finger, she tried to keep it together and scowled. "You're supposed to be humanity's strongest but you couldn't even save (F/N)! Useless, spineless bastard! Where is she? What are you doing about it? Bring my friend back, bri…br…" Pounding fists against his solid chest, she started to sob and lost control, tears streaming in bitter rivers. Levi stayed in place, letting it happen. This is what you would have done, allowed whatever was needed to alleviate the sorrow. He'd had his moment, now it was this woman's. Stopping short of a full on show of emotion, he lifted a hand and placed it gently on Brynn's back in support.

The other man present tilted his head at the action, wondering what was going on inside his friend's mind. News of the breakdown in the Captain's quarters had reached him last night but no discussion had been held. It seemed a total opposite to his current behaviour and Erwin spoke softly.

"Brynn, you're relieved of any duties today. Take some time." Sniffing, she stepped back and gave Levi a faint look of thanks.

"No I'm ok. I need to keep busy. Just tell me one thing? You are going to get (F/N) back, right?"

"Yes. Perhaps not as soon as we'd hope, but we will." Brynn nodded and wiped her eyes, walking away slowly as two men watched closely. "Levi, my office. We need to talk." No protest was given as they began the small trip.

Sitting instead of standing, the shorter male placed his right leg over the left one, arms crossed and face lax as he started the conversation. "I've cleared everything, don't worry."

"Thank you. Do you need a new chair?"

"Yes."

"Anything else?"

"Might want to get another fucking desk, too." He was calm and collected, apparently unconcerned with chatting about his violent meltdown yesterday. "Actually, just give me everything." Large brows lifted in surprise, full extent of the man's wrath made clear. 

"I can't give you everything, Levi."

"Oh? Shall I sleep in your bed, then?"

"No, I mean I won't be able to mend mental scars."

"Tch. Fuck off, Erwin." Leaning forward, the blonde fixed onto molten discs that were almost white today.

"Don't keep it all inside."

"I'm not. I deal with things in my own fucking way."

"Your way, or (F/N)'s?" Shrugging, Levi stayed unflappable.

"I had a good teacher."

~~~~~~

Weak and spent, you groaned as another bout of sickness racked your body and dry wretches followed, no food having been provided yet. By your estimation it had been a few days now, maybe four, each one filled with tests and experiments. The latest invasion had consisted of physical exertion and you were made to run round the room for hours, all the while chained by the neck like a horse being broken in. Eventually your legs had given out and sent you crashing to the floor, which was where you had remained. If your internal calendar was correct, an expedition outside the walls would be taking place today, your comrades leaving to put their lives on the line for mankind once again. Sending positive thoughts, you wished for a safe journey to all and gagged, stomach empty yet still intent on ridding you of something.

An unknown distance away, Levi vaguely heard the cry from the front, excursion going ahead regardless as yet another call from Erwin sounded out, announcing the fifty sixth mission was underway. Tutting, the dark haired man spurred his horse on and as he exited the confines of the perimeter, he glanced up and made a promise, one which he never would have in the past - I'll be back, (F/N). After this, I'll commit all of my waking hours to finding you and slaughtering every last one of those fuckers. Unfortunately, unimaginable events were to put a stop to that.

~~~~~~

A commotion had been raging for what you guessed was nearly a week, rushes of bodies in the corridors above and hurried footsteps. Something major was going on somewhere but it didn't seem to deter your abusers as you sat strapped to a chair, being force fed. Every swallow was punctuated by a churning below, organs deprived and unable to take the sudden influx of sustenance.

"Stop…please…I…" Ejecting the last piece of meat involuntarily, you spared a faint thought about how ironic this was, body refusing a coveted item for some reason.

"You have ta eat. Restore that strength."

"I can't…please don't…" Bread was rammed into your begging mouth and a hand clamped your jaw shut.

"Take it down." Dry muscles tensed and you managed to do as commanded, stamping back the need to vomit. "Good girl. Right, that's enough fucking about for now. Shit's bad out there, we don't have a lot of time." The man smiled, facial hair framing the almost gargoyle-like sneer and held up a scalpel, eye reflected in the surface. "Are you gonna tell us now?"

"There's nothing…nothing to tell…I swear..." A fist connected with your cheek for the hundredth time, knuckles digging into already bruised skin as the attack spread, blows and kicks offered along with your faint mumbles.

"I'll get it out of ya eventually (F/N)." The last bit of food reappeared again, adding to the pile of not yet digested items. Yesterday's tests had been intense, a variety of substances injected which all elicited different reactions in you. One had caused uncontrollable tears, another ridiculous anger, next a black out for hours. None of it gave them what they wanted though, never would. You were literally useless.

"Hold on." The woman who delighted in providing the poisons spoke from the corner, halting the onslaught. "I've got an idea." Coming close, she selected yet more drugs and you moaned.

"No…not again…"

"Shut up. This might have no effect, but I think it will. Should be interesting." Whatever it was, the fluid was shoved into your failing veins, arms peppered with purple dots that told a tale of constant additions and also frequent removals. "That last blood work was slightly different."

"Wha…what do you mean?"

"We'll see soon enough, (F/N). This could be the catalyst we need." Smiling with devilish joy, the two stood back to watch.

"How long? We're needed upstairs." Your male tormentor appeared restless and kept glancing over his shoulder.

"Few minutes, maximum." You let your head drop forward, acidic taste in your mouth and waited for the no doubt horrific avalanche of sensations. What eventually followed was most certainly not expected.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is where I got up to before moving it over, next chapter will be up soon hopefully!


	19. The Passage Of Time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a time-skip chapter, as the title suggests. It's not out of laziness, purely didn't want to re-hash what we already know. Hope you enjoy :)

Levi stared down the deep well, eyes searching for anything interesting as Hange shouted by his side. Fucking nothing, just a distressed figure covered in his own blood. Probably best to stop this before the kid does himself serious damage, he thought and brought the experiment to an end. Taking a break, the Captain sipped his tea as Petra chatted excitedly as usual, her words only slightly making sense. Nearly a month had gone by since that fateful day, a whole new year upon him and he found his world plunged into yet more turmoil, unprecedented events keeping them all occupied with the more important task. After seeing the carnage that had ensued following the breach, he had once more chanted the names of those fallen, the ones he knew anyway, keeping up a habit and using it in a way to stay close to you. No one had a clue where this would all lead just yet and he barely even flinched at the explosion behind. 

Miles away you knelt on the floor and sobbed, surrounded by red fluid and in intense pain. The last injection hadn't been instant like the woman had supposed so they gave you more every single day, filling your body with evil potions until now. It had been a success of sorts but they still weren't happy by the sounds of the man's voice.

"Nothing. Fuck. What else can we do?"

"I don't know. Keep it up. We have other considerations too, remember." 

"Yea. That new gear ready?"

"Nearly." Two sadistic stares looked down on your sorry form, battered and bruised, malnourished and now enveloped in pitiful wails of sorrow. "Stop blubbering, (F/N). Get over it." You couldn't even manage a reply and fell backwards, curled in a ball and praying for something else, pleading internally to see Levi one more time before death took hold. 

~~~~~~

Weeks of tests had resulted in this moment, along with a lot of risky gambles and covert planning. Erwin led the troops once more outside the walls but with a different goal in mind this time. He knew losses would be heavy but this needed to be done, traitor smoked out once and for all. Trees came into view and he gave the orders, aware of how odd it might seem but it was all part of the scheme, members waiting inside to use the newly developed machinery. 

Levi glanced back and saw the bait had worked, Eren used expertly to draw the enemy in, one which was quite different from the norm. He hoped the Commander was right. Too many had died already. Raising the gun, he shot a noise flare to signal their approach and thundered through the forest. 

At the same time you looked up with fatigue, no longer caring what these people would do. Anything more would just be surplus and much of the same. They seemed to realise that but carried on regardless and as the next round of punches were inflicted, you closed your one good eye, other swollen shut already and started to think, blocking out the pain as you wondered what everyone was doing. Were they safe? Alive? Was the increasing activity anything to do with your comrades? Would you ever see them again? 

Hours later and night had fallen, your destroyed form huddled in the shadows. They'd at least given you clean clothes at some point but the floor was still stained with your blood and sick, the smell awful and dank air dripping in thick reminders of what had been done to you. No questions or interrogations ever came anymore, just brutal torture.

Levi sat in quiet contemplation, alone and holding a bottle with a pale hand. So many had been taken today, bodies never to be recovered and now the threat of being reprimanded by those above hung over everyone. Of course they wouldn't allow it, plans in motion already but right now it was about remembering the dead, a solemn line of words coming out - his peers, your friend. Brynn had been one of those brought back but couldn't be saved, hold on life not strong enough as she passed with a smile on her face, finally meeting her lost love somewhere in the skies. Drinking deeply, he honoured those spirited away and once more refused to speak one thing. (F/N). 

Revenge was firmly in mind now, that big fucking shifter bitch had to pay for all his comrades, those who he worked with in perfect synch, the four who trusted him implicitly. And now they were gone, mangled corpses left for the picking, whether that be by titans or animals. Wincing as he rolled his injured leg, Levi took another swig and voiced them last - "Petra, Oluo, Eld, Gunther."

~~~~~~

Eren stared at the man opposite, the placid and seemingly solid male who had suffered a serious blow, all of his team no longer with him but here he was making crude jokes about bowel movements as if nothing had happened. How could he be so cold? Also discovering the female titan's alleged identity had been taken in his stride, no sign of emotion at finding out who potentially had killed all those people. 

Shuffling nervously, the brunette spoke quietly, a far cry from his last outburst. "Commander? A decoy? Will that work?"

"Worked before. In a way." The Captain answered his question and stood, leaving the room slowly to account for his wound. Something else needed to be asked so Eren got closer to the large blonde who had just given him a chance to remain safe with the Corps. 

"Why is he so calm? After everything that went on?"

"He has his own way of mourning, Eren." Looking down to the head strong youth, Erwin sighed. "That man has lost more than you could imagine, but he was taught well."

"What do you mean?"

"Someone left us a while ago, a person who kept everyone sane and helped us deal with death."

"Why did they leave?" A frown crossed impressive eyebrows, sorrow etched on his features. 

"She didn't want to." It was all he'd get by the looks of it so Eren stashed the interesting sounding story for later, concentrating on the mission he would be undertaking in two days. 

~~~~~~

No one had bothered you for a while, last beating probably over a day ago. You weren't even chained up. Movement wasn't an option though, body too weak to consider any kind of escape plan. Luckily there had been a jug of water left in here which you'd been rationing, odd sips taken when needed. Given your abandonment, food hadn't arrived either, typical now that you actually had an appetite. There had been a ferocious burst of extreme action up top, shouts and yells still continuing as some offensive was being undertaken. Peeling your eyes open, you leant up on shaking arms and tried to crawl to the door, one which may or may not be locked. A few words were made out, ones from your main abuser as he ordered people around, warning them to be on their guard. 

"He might be a little shrimp, but that Levi can be a slippery shit. Watch out." Did he…did he say Levi? He's alive! About to fight these guys by the sounds of it, but alive! Gaining some new found strength from the pit of your soul, the exit was scrabbled towards, hoping that their lack of attention had extended to security. Never before had you wanted so badly to be in a room without a key. Wood swung inwards as the tall man strode in, terrifying grimace on his face and a bag in one hand. Throwing the brown sack to the wall, he brought his leg back but before the foot connected with your head and darkness came, you were able to croak one last thing. 

"He's going to fucking kill all of you." 

When you finally woke, the taste of blood was strong in your mouth and it was deathly silent, no others here any more. Holding your sore jaw, you slithered over the filthy floor to see what had been left in here. Inside the hessian was the most glorious sight, lightened mood turned ecstatic as you saw the bundle of food within. So they weren't finished with you yet, just temporarily distracted by what would surely be a vengeful attack. Smiling for the first time since arriving in your prison, you dug in and estimated the amounts, mentally dividing and noting perishables which would need to be eaten sooner. 

What was going on out there? Nibbling on some fruit, you took it slow so as not to cause any cramping to your empty stomach but it was hard to stay calm, the texture and juicy flesh sending you insane with pleasure - such a small thing causing so much joy. You imagined it was like tilting your head up in the rain when you hadn't drunk in days. Sweet chunks ran down your throat and you made some more calculations, working out your sentence based on beatings and experiments, the latter having all but ceased now. Six weeks? Maybe more? Never mind. Focus. If they really are outside in battle, would they be back? Best thing to do was remain here a while and gain strength before attempting to leave. 

Far above the cellar in which you were kept, Levi scaled the roof tops and snarled. Finally he could exact revenge on those responsible for your abduction and who knews what else. But he never guessed it would be fucking Kenny at the head of all of this, him and his group of shits that had killed two colleagues already. He wasn't going to let them get away with any of it, a number of the enemy taken out swiftly and he spun into a nearby tavern, aware that the landlord would be allowed to keep a weapon. Crouching behind the bar, he kept up the pretence of conversation and adjusted a bottle, shotgun in hand and ready to go. Fate had brought these bastards into play and they would pay dearly for everything. 

~~~~~~

Using an empty jug for a makeshift vessel, you grumbled at the degrading toilet you'd had to employ and regretted drinking so much. It had stayed quiet for a while, perhaps a few days or even a week and no one returned, leaving you here to ponder next steps. Resting a while, you used the ability to recall events with immense clarity and zoned in on happier times, smiling at memories. Levi when he had massaged your sore muscles, Mike in the middle of placing every single item in Erwin's office upside down, including the desk. The Commander talking to you excitedly about the outside world, Hange bouncing around when her latest theories were proved correct. Brynn laughing as Petra tipped a cup of freezing water down someone's trousers in payback for spying on the girl's changing. Dita lovingly feeding his horse, only to have it rip the scarf from his head for the millionth time. You'd see them all again. Soon. 

Shaking your limbs, the recollections were still vivid in your mind and a decision was made. Now or never. Whoever was keeping you locked up seemed to be gone for good, hopefully meeting their end by painful means. Standing on uncertain legs, you gathered the rest of the food and shouldered the bag, door still ajar as it had been since the man left you behind. You'd wanted to wait to make sure they didn't come back but also become better at physical exertion. With no idea how far from home you were, you took a deep breath and walked out. 

The only other thing down here was a stair case which you took slowly, unable to consider faster steps. Up on the ground level, you looked around and spotted a water skin, full of liquid and snatched it to your chest like it was your first-born. Scowling, you placed it in the brown sack and continued through plush seats, some of which had been knocked over like it had been a rush to leave. A small pistol sat on a table, ornate details in the handle and you lifted the heavy item carefully. Maybe not. Placing it back down, you realised having no experience with guns would probably lead to self-injury. 

The main entrance was in sight and you pulled it open, bright sunshine burning your eyes like needles had been shoved into them, hand up to provide shade. You were in the middle of a town, a city, one which was busy but in a different way to normal. Military police circulated and you saw a rather important looking man being arrested, populous either jeering or reading their newspapers closely. A page from one had become detached, floating over in the breeze and you bent gently, holding the lines up to your face, words like 'revolution' and 'true Queen' standing out in your fuzzy line of vision. A lot had happened, it seemed. Discarding the paper that you could no longer focus on, you began to walk, aimlessly following streets and paths. Some glances were passed your way, a few sympathetic however mostly distasteful. You were aware of what you must have looked like but didn't give a shit. You were going home. 

Progress had been at a snail's pace, stopping for breath and sustenance regularly, not pushing too hard and causing further harm. Directions had been requested and points given, arduous journey probably not yet half way through by the time night fell and you found a quiet alley to rest in for a while, shivering body unable to retain warmth sufficiently.

~~~~~~

Nearly twenty four hours after your attempt to sleep, Eren sat in the mess hall surrounded by familiar faces, usual conversations being held like nothing had been going on in their crazy world. In reality, Historia had been recently crowned, the Corps exonerated and plans were being made to retake Wall Maria. It would take a while to get to that point so it was down time now, new additions to their numbers joining in with the chats, people who had signed up now that they could see the facts clearly. Turning, he saw Levi sitting on the walkway outside as he had taken to doing recently, cup in hand and staring upwards into the night's sky. The brunette considered going to talk, see what the Captain was thinking about and he stood, tentative steps taken in that direction but something made him stop, a figure approaching from across the grounds. 

Dragging your feet, you dropped the nearly empty bag and grinned, laughing and crying at the same time as lights brighter than you'd ever seen came into view, strings of luminous lamps across the awning that a lone person sat underneath. Body language told you exactly who it was even if your failing sight didn't and you tried to speed up, torso forward to urge your weary legs to go faster. Levi sensed movement and glanced round, eyes narrowed at first but suddenly they widened and he jumped to attention, heart racing with flutters of adrenaline. Could it be? After all this time? Of course it was, there was no mistaking that flash of messy (h/c) hair and admittedly slighter frame. He observed the way you struggled to move and ran, ran for the woman who had been missing in his life for too long. 

As he got closer you couldn't stand any longer, limbs giving way and you collapsed to the grassy ground, kneeling as if in thanks to some higher power, tears streaming down your face. In seconds the man was in front of you on his knees, arms hugging tight as kisses were placed quickly on your dry lips. Levi almost failed to believe it, needing to make sure this was real and placed his hands on your cheeks as you copied his action, gazes connected. 

"Levi…" 

"Shh (F/N), don't speak, save your energy."

"But…"

"Shut up, brat." Stealing more pecks, he smiled, a genuine expression and mumbled quietly. "I fucking love you (F/N)…so much…"

"I love you Levi…shit…I thought I'd never see you again."

"Don't be stupid. This was always going to happen. Do you know why?"

"Because we didn't say goodbye. This is the next time."


	20. Mixed Feelings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I should give a warning for this one, not being specific because that would ruin the flow of the story but there's descriptions of cruelty here.

Green eyes watched the embrace from afar, realisation of who had returned finally sinking in. Eren had managed to gather information on the woman Erwin spoke about once, the person who seemed to have provided so much mental support in times of need. Stories had been given, funny anecdotes and some downright embarrassing ones, tales that made his cheeks flush bright red. He saw the way the two of you held each other close on the ground, the blatant emotion radiating from a pair of darkly clothed humans.

"Hey Eren, what are you doing standing there with your mouth open, deary? You'll catch flies like…oh…my…DAYS! Go and get the Commander!" Hange pushed past the brunette, sending him into the wall as she ran out of the building, arms in the air waving maniacally with joy. Nearing the couple, the older female shrieked with elation and threw herself down, grip around you both and wet kisses applied to your cheek. "(F/N)! I can't...it's…argh!" She pulled back with a crazy grin, one which dropped instantly. "What the hell did they do to you?" 

Levi hadn't paid attention at first, was just happy to have you back but now he could see your features in the dim light, the bruises that were in different stages of healing, the way your lids were swollen and how hollow your face looked. If the people responsible hadn't all perished already, he would have killed them instantly. You smiled weakly and shook your head, trying to bite back fresh tears; any speaking would have caused them to fall. 

"Fuck off four eyes, give her some space."

"Sorry." Another figure approached and you looked up into bright blue eyes that held the weight of the world inside. Something was wrong and you frowned. 

"Erwin…what happened?" Whispers were all you could manage as you saw the right sleeve of his shirt pinned up, empty and loose. 

"Don't worry about me, (F/N). There's plenty of time to fill you in and believe me, it's a lot of information to take all at once." Crouching, he held his remaining arm out and ran a large, caring hand down your cheek. "It's good to see you again."

"And you. All of you. I…" It became hard to make sense of the shapes all around, blurred images that you knew were people but they just wouldn't stay still, refused to make a coherent picture. "I…"

"(F/N)? You ok?"

"Fuck…I…" 

"Get her to the medical rooms, now." Levi was already picking you up before Erwin spoke, the haze in your eyes causing fear to shoot through his heart. Eren looked over as a frail form was carried to the other end of the building, the Captain's strides swift as his pale face was pulled into a frown of determination. 

"Who's that?"

"The woman that everyone from before was telling us about. She's back."

"She doesn't look good, Eren." 

"No Armin. She doesn't." 

You were laid on a bed, Hange carefully removing the loose clothing, a throwback to how you used to dress. Erwin turned after getting an eyeful of your injuries, not wanting to intrude on what was a naked body beneath the huge garments. The other female hissed in disbelief and Levi glared down at the broken, damaged skin under his stare, the needle holes and what was most certainly a boot mark on your abdomen. 

"They're all fucking dead now, (F/N)."

"Really?"

"Really. I only wish it was purely by my hand." 

"Ok honey, this is going to sting but trust me, it will quicken the healing process." Wincing at the cold tincture, delicate female fingers massaged the gel into your flesh, all over due to the extent of your beatings. "What did they put in you?" Moving over the puncture points, she remained professional despite just wanting to scream on your behalf. 

"I…I don't know. Poisons. Drugs. Stuff that made me act strange. Also took my blood frequently. They were trying to make me snap."

"Just like we did."

"No Erwin. You didn't hurt me." Silence descended as your back was seen to with tenderness, sitting position making your head spin. Clutching out, you found Levi's shirt and held on tight to provide steadiness. "How long was I gone?"

"Two months."

"Fuck. Where's Mike?" The softening in his grey orbs told you everything and you moaned. "Oh shit, no. No." Gulping back as salty droplets sprung forth, you spoke quietly. "Brynn? Dita? Petra?" Your lover's response was to recant all of those lost since you had been imprisoned, a depressingly long list that just kept going and going, some you didn't know but most were painfully familiar, including your friends. Crying loudly, you felt strong arms take you into a protective hug, any physical pain overtaken by mental. Hange eventually broke the moment with a quiet tone.

"All done. Is there anything else we should know?" Alluding to sexual abuse, she stroked your bare shoulders. 

"No. Nothing like that." Something in your voice was hesitant, pointing to a darker admission but thankfully your doctor for the day didn't probe. 

"Good. Obviously I'd like to take some blood to check it over but that can wait. Get some rest." 

"Thanks, Hange." She grabbed the Commander's arm and led him out, leaving the couple alone. 

"I'll go and fetch something for you to wear." 

"No, don't. Stay, please?" 

"(F/N), I have to. Get you dressed and then I'm taking you home. Ok?" 

"Ok." Kissing your forehead gently, Levi slipped out and ran, wasting no time being apart from you. Enough of that had happened already. In a matter of minutes he was back, favoured night shirt gone to be replaced with what looked like a comfortable set of pyjamas, soft fabric of dark blue begging to be curled up in. "Where…?"

"I bought it as a gift before you went. Never got the chance to give it to you." 

"Thank you, they're beautiful." He helped you into the new items, tutting at the fact he'd forgotten anything for your feet but you simply smiled. "It's ok. I'll survive." Leading you upstairs slowly, Levi made sure to bear your lighter than usual weight, delicate body assisted through the halls. A few unfamiliar people flew past, waving or nodding in greeting and the door you used to live behind came into view. 

"It's a bit different, (F/N)."

"How?"

"New furniture."

"Why?"

"Fancied a change." The look on his face was somewhere between anger and humour and you correctly surmised that any previous items must have been destroyed in rage. "Erwin wasn't very pleased, big bastard." The man locked up and set you carefully onto the bed, making sure you were happy with the position, offering extra pillows, more covers, food and drink, generally fussing. 

"Levi, stop. Come here." He nodded and laid beside you, cautious cuddle pulling you in. Taking a deep breath, you began to panic, wondering how the fuck you were going to say this. Waiting for another day wouldn't do, reunion placed on hold for the important things. "I...they…shit…"

"Hey. You don't have to…"

"Yes I do. It's not fair if I don't." Employing your method of keeping it as easy as possible, Levi placed his chin on your head and let you bury into his chest. "They gave me some shit one day, the woman said it would work quickly but it didn't. So they stuck it in me again and again until something happened. Something terrible." Pausing for composure, you exhaled in a shake, stomach clenched with fear. "I didn't know, but she noticed. She spotted a way to cause immense pain and bring out my fucking so-called powers." Spitting now, you realised you weren't scared, simply enraged at the whole situation.

"It's ok, (F/N)."

"It's not. It's really not. They took our fucking baby Levi, made my body reject it." Clenching your eyes shut, you waited for any response, not ready to look up yet. A finger on your chin forced that to occur, silver puddles that you'd missed so much staring back with determination. The man felt a mixture of emotions; loss, fury, sorrow. But a resolve ran through him that couldn't be dampened, heart and soul ripped apart yet bursting with certainty.

"(F/N), no one can steal anything away from us ever again. You hear me? Never gonna happen. So." He reached down and took your hand in his tight grip, fingers laced together. "Here's how it's going to be. We get you better, I tell you all about everything and then you and me can start again."

"Start again?"

"Yes. Let's put that shit in the past where it belongs and do it properly." The hold on your hand faded and reappeared as a palm on your belly. "Do it right." 

"You're saying…"

"Be a family." He smiled lightly. "I know how fucking stupid that sounds, but you'll see how things are changing when I explain. For once it's looking good. And those two months only confirmed what I already knew - I can't live without you, (F/N)." Blurred vision signalled the start of more of your tears, happier ones this time as a cracked voice spoke. "Don't. You're going to make a stone cold fucker cry in a minute." Laughing softly, you held him close and sobbed into the brilliant white shirt, mourning and rejoicing all at once. A few shifts in the body next to you suggested a similar state and you kept up the solid embrace, allowing the combination of joy and pain to manifest for as along as needed. 

You both had the same kind of thoughts - obviously something had been taken cruelly, violently, abruptly. But not having known did lend itself bizarrely to the healing process. You presumed it was along the lines of 'how can you miss what you never knew you had?' Perhaps shock had settled in at the time, provided a way to deal with it and now you were being allowed the chance to grieve, for those you'd lost, friends never to be spoken with again and a tiny speck that didn't have a hope, it seemed. Taking solace at Levi's determined words, you clung onto the future, steadfast and resolute to focus on that. You had to. 

Glassy eyes finally swam into view and you raised a hand to his face, tracing the lines that had been absent for so long as he spoke. "You must be hungry."

"I'm…I…yea I am, to be honest." 

"I'll find something, unless those little shits ate it all again."

"Levi?"

"Hmm?"

"Are we actually safe?" He considered your query, holding your gaze. 

"More so than we were before." 

"Ok. I think I should see Hange again in the morning." Levi just nodded, aware of what damage might have been done internally but he didn't want to delve any deeper, enough had been delivered tonight to make for a lifetime of contemplation. 

"I'll be back soon. Rest, (F/N)." Flicking some hair from your face, he ran his finger down a cheek he had recently only dreamt of touching. The man rushed away, dead set on obtaining some nourishing food for his frail woman and passed unhindered down the corridors, pale form striding with purpose. Whatever had been lost could be clawed back, recreated, it would be. Never before had he felt so sure of one thing, one possibility that made perfect sense. A large figure approached and joined him in the swift journey. 

"How is she?"

"She'll be fine, Erwin. She's back here."

"And how are you?"

"Don't start all of that shit again."

"Just remember I'm here if you need me, Levi." The onyx haired man stopped dead, halting in his tracks as an idea formed.

"I do need something, actually." Continuing on their way, he began to explain his simple yet effective request, met by a smile of agreement from his superior.

By the time Levi got back upstairs, tray in hand, he found you sound asleep, exhausted body no longer able to hold onto the day as it allowed what he presumed was the first decent slumber you'd experienced in ages. Smiling lightly, he placed the items down and pulled at sheets, tucking you in carefully before giving a small kiss to your forehead. He looked down at how peaceful you seemed, any troubles forgotten and the man sighed. You'd been returned to him, broken and delicate but that could be fixed. He'd make sure of it. 

~~~~~~

Lying back on the medical bed again, you explained in soft tones to an enraged Hange, her eyes like tiny cuts in between lashes. Levi was standing across the room, arms crossed and face dark as you went into more detail than last night, horrific ordeal relived with a wavering voice. Not knowing what had been injected inside meant little light could be shed on potential treatment but the older woman nodded as you spoke, seemingly aware of a culprit based on the colour of their chosen poison. The last parts were delivered; unbelievable pain that went on for days, inability to stop what was happening, feeling of being completely useless as the first parts of new life drained from you against your will. Without appearing to move, your lover was by your side in an instant, two individual's hands clasped together as he ran a thumb across your skin, holding tight. 

Shaky breaths shuddered out from your lips as you tried to keep calm, wet orbs begging. "Can you help? Please?"

"Oh (F/N), you poor thing. I think I know what it was they gave you but I'll have to do some checks, ok?" Nodding, your affirmation came along with a growl from above.

"Don't fucking hurt her."

"Levi, it might be a bit painful. I'm not going to lie. We need to take bloods too, carry out some examinations. Maybe you should wait outside?" Part of him never wanted to leave again, stay and protect you from everything however he knew this kind of action was required and was also aware of how he would react to seeing you in distress. A squeeze was given as silver hues glanced down into scared but resolute flashes of (e/c). 

"Alright. (F/N), just shout if she's being fucking harsh." 

"Hange wouldn't intentionally harm me. It'll be ok." Levi snorted once and left with a backwards stare, warning implied in the action. As he shut the door, the overly cheery voice announced a small scratch would be felt as yet another sharp, hollow piece of metal was no doubt inserted into your skin. His body remained tense as what was surely hours passed, faint yelps of discomfort seeping through the wooden entry. Digging his nails into soft palms, the grave man made himself stay still, rooted his feet to the spot to deny any attempt at running in and scooping you up. One particularly strained cry sent shots of anguish through his tortured being and he grit his teeth, muttering menacingly under his breath that this had to be done. 

In reality it was about twenty minutes of invasive tests, ones that were carried out as lightly as could be and you opened your eyes. "Done?"

"All done. You did great, (F/N). Levi?" The name wasn't even fully out of Hange's mouth when the angry male re-entered, back to the bedside in seconds as he snapped impatiently. 

"Well?"

"I won't know for certain yet but the substance seems to have all gone. Also from what I can tell, no internal damage is apparent."

"So I'm ok?"

"I think so, dear. Now you need to rest, eat and get strong, you hear me? Lots of relaxation, got it shorty?"

"Fuck off." 

"I'll take that as a yes. Right, off you pop (F/N)." Steady hands helped you off the bed and kept a hold, grip tender but strong. Smiling weakly, you thanked your friend as you were led away slowly, outside instead of back upstairs. Glancing to Levi, you frowned. 

"Where are we going?"

"Somewhere to help you relax, like four eyes said." The grounds were quiet, hardly anyone around and your route was uninterrupted, light breeze bringing relief from what was already a warm day. It tickled through your hair, a sensation lost in recent times and you closed your eyes to enjoy the freedom of nature. In this moment you felt like anything was possible, recovery and stability, health and family. The sound of birds reached your ears, a lifting noise that reminded you of lying beneath the trees with Brynn, shade from the canopy providing a break in the sun's harsh rays. Lids open, you looked up and smiled. She was out there now with Leo, dancing through the clouds and laughing lightly hand in hand.

You saw other faces appear, those of your lost comrades, one particular blonde grinning with mischief as he had no doubt played an evil trick on a fellow ghostly form. A single tear ran down your cheek in memory, lump forming in your throat as Mike's features disappeared to be replaced with reality. They were gone but you had both been spared, left behind to carry on and bear the heavy loss. 

"Levi? I need to know what happened. What's been going on?"

"Sit. I'll tell you everything." The soft grass was pointed at and you lowered down gingerly, careful to take into account your injuries. Levi joined you, silver splinters shining in his gaze. He was ridiculously lucky to have you back, one spark of kind fate in his usually bleak existence. Despite all of the suffering endured, a small glimmer of hope and faith had been offered and he would be holding onto it with both hands, grabbing it tight to his chest and never letting go. "Ok (F/N). Are you ready for all of this shit?"

"Yes. I'm ready."


	21. Back To Normal

Two weeks had gone by with little event, giving you time to digest the insane amount of goings on that occurred whilst you were absent. It was unimaginable what these people had been through, but the younger soldiers continued behaving like usual teens, arguing and snapping at one another. The fact that the often childish Eren could do what he did still hadn't quite sunk in, his vivacious personality betraying the hardships endured. Most days they would go to help the new Queen with the orphans, a noble cause for a noble woman. The lull had also allowed you to train and build up strength, impending attempt to close the breached wall meaning everyone was needed, including you. It was daunting yet exciting, finally able to use your skills for the greater good. 

Pushing yourself as hard as possible, you started the sixth circuit of the grounds, legs pumping and heart racing, shorts and vest soaked in sweat. Perhaps it wasn't the best set of conditions to be running in, however this was required, physical limits pressed forwards with every passing day. Dust clouded up from beneath each footfall, dirt scattered and molecules of brown powder stuck to your wet skin. This was the furthest you'd been able to go so far, lap five usually finishing you off but sheer determination drove you on, ignoring the burn in your lungs and ache in your muscles. 

Growling with effort, you rounded the corner that marked halfway and spotted someone watching, a familiar figure who had recently grudgingly attended meeting after meeting, planning session after planning session. It came with the territory now, the extra power and control meant an increase in political discussions, all of which came down to one thing - paperwork. You kept your eyes ahead, focussed on the goal of circuit seven but a wobble denoted this might not be possible today, a chasm too wide to leap. Giving in to inevitability, your legs slowed as if they were being dragged through deep water and you gasped in gulps of air, feeding your starved body as the sun beat down relentlessly in the afternoon heat. 

"Enough for today, (F/N)."

"You...you…" It was impossible to speak just yet and the man gave you a sly smirk. 

"Is that what it takes to render you speechless? I must remember that."

"Fuck…you…Levi…" On the last word you dropped to the ground, pleased with progress but totally spent. 

"Not in that fucking state. Go clean up, take a shower. Then you can fill this shit in for me." A veritable tome was waved in your direction, so many sheets to sift through and note correctly. It was going to be a long day. 

Aches hadn't set in yet, that would come in the morning and you sat at the desk, white leaves spread around and pen in hand. You'd washed and changed clothes, not just from orders - the way you had smelt was horrific after the work out. Hair still damp, you tapped the end of the writing instrument on pouting lips as calculations were made, numbers carried and proposals put together for the next mission, one which was of so much importance that the margin for error was zero. Levi leant back in his chair, tea in hand and eyes trained on you once more, little details scrutinised; frown, posture, the small drip of water that had run down the front of your throat unnoticed, residue of the wet locks. And the scent. You used the same soap, but somehow he never caught that fragrance quite like you, an entrancing mixture of perfume and your own body. 

After about an hour you announced it was complete and laid the pen to one side, stretching your neck to rid the strain that came with being hunched for so long. The man stood and walked behind, strong hands appearing on your flesh as expert digs were applied to the offended area. It was sublime, stress and pain removed almost instantly by that touch. He gazed down, the ghosts of your injuries still visible ever so slightly as your sleeves were short. Neither of you would forget what had happened, what had been taken, unknown entity stolen even before you were aware it existed yourselves. Faint dots on the inside of your arms stood out and he scowled. 

"You're pushing yourself too hard, (F/N)."

"You made me do it."

"Not the paperwork, idiot. Training." Knowing what he meant, you smiled and closed your eyes in satisfaction. 

"I have to. I can't be out there and not in peak condition, Levi. You know that."

"Mmm. I suppose." Working on a particularly stubborn knot, he sighed. "I have no fucking idea what's going to happen." 

"No one does. That's how it is."

"Just stay fucking safe."

"Same applies to you. Shit, I'm starved. When's dinner?"

"Tch. Always thinking with your stomach, (L/N)."

"I have lost time to make up for."

"No need to gorge yourself though. Fine. Come on." The Captain led the way through quiet halls, others presumably all gathered for food already, but he took an unusual turn, one that pointed away from the kitchens and you frowned. 

"Losing sense of direction, Levi? Sign of old age."

"Fuck off. Just follow me." He looked round, smug smile on his lips as he peered out through ebony locks, a gesture that never failed to create childish butterflies in your stomach. Corridors were taken along with stairs, ending on the uppermost floor which contained more plush surroundings, rooms for receiving important visitors. You'd been up here to clean and tidy before, Erwin's own quarters residing at the far end but he rarely seemed to use them, often found in his office below instead. The smallest of the spaces was reached, door firmly closed. Levi placed his grip on the handle and stifled the larger grin that threatened when he saw the look on your face, pure confusion and the beginnings of what could become a grumble if things weren't revealed soon. It was too much fun to wind you up and he paused. 

"Are we going in, or…?"

"Wait, (F/N). Patience is a virtue."

"Well in that case I must be a sinner because I don't deal very well with waiting." 

"Think of it as an order?"

"That won't wash anymore, Levi. I'm just a regular soldier now." Something flickered across his expression, a softness rarely seen but always alluding to a deeper emotion. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong, brat. Why would it be?"

"You look weird."

"Thanks. Keep the fucking compliments coming." You sighed and shook your head, gentle touch on his arm. 

"Sorry. I just worry when I see that face on you." He supposed it may have looked like sorrow, which it was in a round about way. He should have known better than to expect you to miss it. 

"Quit with that fucking psychological shit, (F/N)." 

"Then tell me what's bothering you. Don't keep it inside." The roll of silver eyes was unexpected, as was the twitch in the corners of his mouth and the door was finally opened, sight taking your breath away. Candles had been lit to provide light in the dim evening atmosphere, shining glasses on the table along with all sorts of delicacies and a bottle of deep red liquid. You didn't know what to say and just stood dumbfounded at the threshold. 

"Coming?" A pale hand was offered and you took it, allowing your body to be dragged in. 

"Oh…my…why? What's going on?" 

"Dinner, idiot."

"But…"

"Don't question it. Sit." 

"Yes Sir." Smiling with cheeky intent, you gazed over the offerings and felt your chest tighten, disbelief at the effort and gesture. "How did you do all of this?"

"I know people." It was all you'd get, man unmoveable on the subject so you sat, joined by his form by your side. Eating in silence, you tasted things as yet undiscovered, each morsel providing sustenance along with delight. You still sensed a reticence from the person next to you, male deep in thought and it became too much. 

"Thank you Levi. For everything. But please, what's the matter? I know when you're brooding." A small huff was given along with a sigh, his face down as he stared into the wine. He was no good at this but had to swallow his pride. 

"You said you were just a regular soldier."

"Right?"

"And a while ago you told us there was nothing special about you."

"Mmm hmm?"

"Neither are correct."

"What do you mean?" Placing his glass down, Levi stamped down the ball of nerves forming inside and mentally slapped himself for being such a fool. Steely eyes met yours and a tight grasp appeared on your skin, fingers linked together. The serious stare was one never before seen and you swallowed deeply, slightly apprehensive at what was coming. 

"(F/N) listen. If it wasn't for you, I'd have let all of the loss and violence consume me. You gave me an outlet to deal with this shit, allowed me to grieve in a way that works. Saved me. So you see, there is something special about you and 'regular soldier' will never be a term I would use to describe you." He gripped harder, nails digging in but you didn't care, the shine in his flecked orbs was captivating. Levi gazed back, taking in the (e/c) flashes that sparked with life, perfect features and a beauty that came from within, radiating understanding and compassion, a person who had delivered him from insanity. Keeping the same studious look, he laughed lightly, a single noise of irony - able to slay giants and humans yet useless in matters of this persuasion. 

"You don't have to be afraid, Levi."

"I'm not afraid." In reality he was completely petrified and gulped back the huge lump in his throat, giving in to inevitability. "One day (F/N). One day I'm going to fucking marry you." The two of you stayed still, eyes locked and smiles growing on your faces, souls lifted. 

"Is that a promise?"

"It is. A deadly serious one. I have nothing to give you, only my word."

"That's all I could ever need, Levi." 

"Just don't expect me to get all fucking emotional."

"Wouldn't dream of it." Leaning in, he did the exact opposite and took your lips softly, conveying what his words were lacking, loving embrace sealing the moment. Drawing back, you reached up to place a hand on his warm cheek, elation bubbling below and ready to burst in a fountain of inane chatter so you dampened it down, staying relatively calm. "I knew there was a soft side in there somewhere."

"Fuck off." 

"I won't tell." The man smirked and stood, coughing slightly and regaining his usual sardonic expression.

"You can tidy this fucking mess up later, (L/N)."

"Like fuck I will!" Slapping his arm playfully, you saw the glimmer of mischief in his eyes and shook your head. "So irritating sometimes. Just because you're going to be my husband, doesn't mean you can boss me around."

"No. I'm your Captain, that's reason enough."

"Whatever, Levi." Walking out with a smile, you felt intense euphoria, heart bursting in a sense of completeness. How things changed, you thought. Once driven down with menial tasks and kept subservient, here you were now with love in your very core and a true purpose; it wasn't a fabled prophecy, only an honest path, one which was twofold - serve in the Corps and be part of something equally special, a real and deep partnership that could see you through anything. Mind occupied, you failed to notice the leg shooting out and fell into the hallway, just managing to stay on your feet. "Oi!"

"Helping with your concentration, (F/N)."

"One day you're going to do me some damage."

"Tch. As if." The door was closed and the two of you made the trip back to your shared room, bickering and nudging one another the whole way. It wouldn't be the same if you suddenly turned into some loved-up couple who worshipped the ground the other walked on, preferring to retain the childish jibes that had always formed part of your relationship right from day one when you entered this job. At first it had been plain annoying, or perhaps not. Maybe this was meant to be? Sentimental fluff probably, but warming all the same. 

Inside your quarters the tender side was allowed to materialise, private life often full of the same good-natured, juvenile squabbling but there was often room for more gentle behaviour, this being one of those instances. Sighing, two mouths connected in soft kisses, calm and peaceful. Levi had a spark inside, something he'd never experienced before, a firm yearning that had been satiated finally with his somewhat callous proposal. Pulling your top away slowly, he tossed the item to the side and ran his palms up and down your flesh, basking in the sensation taking over his skin, feeling the strength that had been returning with every day you worked so hard, a testament to your resilience and desire to be useful. 

You dealt with his also, naked torsos allowed to come together again and you placed pecks in the spot you knew drove him crazy, on the jaw just below his ear. A light grasp in his raven locks gave you further access and a moan announced the move was much appreciated. Muttering, you kept up the motions as fingers undid your trousers. "Love you, Levi."

"Love you, (F/N)." It was rare to utter those words, neither of you saying it often as you both knew, however sometimes it had to come out, join the passionate moment. Not long after and two bare figures shuffled for the bed, hands rubbing without urgency and lips lazily nipping wherever they wanted. Down on the mattress, the care continued and Levi paused, gazing into bright (e/c) that seemed tinged with a variety of other colours tonight. "So fucking gorgeous." You smiled at the slight tilt to his head, a position of almost wonder and you shifted to the side. In a languid adjustment, the man softly filled his wife-to-be and gave a groan of satisfaction, not just sexual but much more. Pushing up into the sedate pace, you sighed and held tight, keeping your lover close as two bodies intertwined with care and attention. 

No matter what was awaiting you in the coming months, you would do it together, side by side and with extreme vengeance - no one was going to take anything away again and the two of you would fight for your lives to hold that true, fight for your family, one which was yet to be built but the foundations were solid, unmoving and powerful. 

~~~~~~

Despite the late hour, Erwin paced the headquarters, unable to rest as his mind buzzed with ideas, plans and schemes. As usual in this state, the Commander had taken to walking it off, surveying his domain and tiring his wired body out. 

Approaching a familiar room, one which now housed the reunited couple, he smiled. Judging by the sounds, Levi's plan had been well received. Quickening his step, the smirk dropped as he hurried away, lewd squeals and shouts becoming too much to handle. 

The blonde shook his head. For now, everything was back to normal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that is that! I could have carried on but in honesty, it seemed like a nice happy place to end it and just *cough* ignore what actually happens next.. .

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [There's No Such Things as Ghosts! (Ghost!Mike Zacharias x various) *manga spoilers *](https://archiveofourown.org/works/6810136) by [orphan_account](https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account)




End file.
